Comfort Zone
by IamJenbob
Summary: Jane accepts a New Year's resolution challenge from Maura to try new things each month in an effort to break out of their comfort zones. Will love eventually be one of those new things? – Rated M for Rizzles (and probably a little cursing)
1. New Year's Day

**January 1 - New Year's Day**

"So did my mother throw things out the window again last night?"

It was an Italian superstition to throw old pots, pans, clothes, appliances, and in some cases even furniture out the window on New Year's Eve. The activity symbolized the idea of letting go of past unhappiness to prepare for the future. Jane's father had adamantly refused to allow his wife to throw "perfectly good things" out the window when they had been together, seeing it as nothing more than a waste of money. Now that she was on her own, though, Angela had fully embraced the custom.

"As a matter of fact, she did," Maura replied, a trace of laughter in her voice. She and Jane were currently sitting side by side at the counter that separated the detective's kitchen from her living room, drinking wine and finishing up a dinner that had been prepared by the aforementioned Italian matriarch. "Which was almost very unfortunate for me. I completely forgot she would be doing that, and I almost tripped over a pan that was lying on the ground when I got home last night."

"I don't know why you keep letting her do it," Jane said, half exasperated, half embarrassed by her mother's behavior. "Just tell her to stop and she'll stop. She didn't do it while she was living with my father."

"Yes, that's true, and look how lucky that turned out to be," Maura said pointedly.

Jane's eyebrows shot up. "Sarcasm on the first day of the year, Dr. Isles? I'm impressed."

Maura chuckled softly. "I'll admit that it's a bit of an inconvenience, but it's her home. I can't tell her that she can't do something if it's important to her."

"Of course you can," Jane scoffed. "You're her landlord."

"It's a tradition, Jane."

"It's a tradition to put you at risk of breaking your neck tripping over the crap she throws out the window?" Jane asked.

The medical examiner sighed and shook her head. "It's not that big of a deal."

"Alright, fine. _I'll_ tell her not to do it next year."

"No you won't."

"Yes, I will. Maura, it's just a ridiculous superstition."

"'A ridiculous superstition'? You mean like eating _cotechino con lenticchie _on New Year's Day?"

Jane looked down at her plate. _Cotechino con lenticchie_, or pork sausage with lentils, was a traditional Italian meal served on New Year's Day. Eating the dish was supposed to bring good fortune and wealth in the upcoming year. For as long as she could remember, Jane had eaten her mother's _cotechino con lenticchie_ as her primary New Year's Day meal. And while she didn't really believe it would bring her wealth and good luck, she also didn't see any reason to risk not eating it either.

Jane lifted her head to see Maura smirking at her. "No, this is a _delicious_ superstition," she replied, before taking another bite. She tried to keep her features neutral, but despite her best efforts, a smile began to appear on her face. "There's a difference."

"Of course there is," Maura replied solemnly. The medical examiner studied her own plate. "Well at least the lentils are good for you, but the fatty sausage–"

"So what time did you get home last night?" Jane asked, deliberately changing the subject.

Maura looked up at the detective. Jane's expression was one of complete innocence, but the medical examiner knew her friend far too well to be fooled. Deciding it wasn't worth arguing about Jane's eating habits while she was enjoying a special dinner that her mother had cooked for her, Maura ate the last bite of her meal, set her fork down, and used her napkin to dab at her mouth. "About one o'clock," she replied.

"Really?" Jane asked, not bothering to hide her surprise. "You were home by one o'clock? Obviously I was right about the party. It couldn't have been that great if you were home so early."

Maura had attended an annual New Year's Eve charity event thrown by the Isles Foundation the night before. Every year for the past four years, Maura had invited Jane to attend with her as her guest, and every year for the past four years, Jane had declined. The detective had made it clear that she had no interest in attending a formal event where she would feel uncomfortable and out of place, when she could instead spend the evening at home in comfortable clothes.

"Actually it was wonderful. The music, the dancing, the food. You should have come with me. You would have had fun."

"Right, and which part would have been fun?" Jane asked sardonically. "The music I don't like, the dancing I don't do, or the tiny weird food I can't stand to eat?"

"The company you enjoy?" Maura asked meaningfully, her left eyebrow rising a fraction.

Jane sighed contritely. She knew Maura had really wanted her to go with her to the party, and that fact had _almost_ been enough to convince the detective to go. The memory of five years ago when she _had_ attended the party, however, was still clear enough in her mind to prevent her from doing so.

The Isles Foundation New Year's Eve party was one of the most prestigious events of the winter season, and was attended by the crème de la crème of Boston society. As hostess of the event, Maura had been required to spend her time mingling with the members of Boston's wealthy elite, every single one of whom seemed to have been intent on having a long, drawn out conversation with her. As a result, Jane had barely seen Maura the entire night. Instead, she had found herself talking to people she didn't know while pretending to be interested in things she wasn't interested in. On the one occasion she had been asked to dance, she had tripped her partner and nearly sent them both crashing to the floor. She had never felt more like an uncultured, graceless clod in her entire life, and she had no intention of putting herself through that again when there was no reason for her to do so.

"The company would have been enjoyable," Jane agreed, somewhat chastened. "But as hostess, the company had duties to attend to that would have made it impossible for her to spend more than a few minutes of time with me anyway. I'm sure there were plenty of fascinating people there to keep you occupied."

Maura nodded her head slightly. "As a matter of fact, I did meet one interesting gentleman: Gerald Ayers. He's an environmental lawyer for the state."

And that was the other part of the Isles Foundation charity event that Jane had hated: the part where she had been forced to watch every single man in the place drool over her friend like she was a piece of meat. It would have been one thing, Jane supposed, if the men fawning over Maura had been doing so because they had seen for themselves just how incredible her friend was. But they didn't see the kind, thoughtful, intelligent person behind the beautiful face, the perfect body, and the expensive clothes. No, all they saw _was_ the beautiful face, the perfect body, and the expensive clothes, and perhaps more important, the ticket to instantly increasing their own social status amongst Boston's elite. Watching her friend gliding effortlessly across the dance floor with pretentious suitor after pretentious suitor, each more shallow and less deserving of the amazing gift that was Maura Isles than the last, had been nearly more than Jane could bear. And that had been five years ago; now, Jane knew, it would be far worse.

Five years ago, Jane had not yet realized that she was attracted to women.

But things had changed over the last five years, and slowly but surely, Jane had begun to accept that she was just as interested in women as men, if not more so. Nine months ago, she had finally found the courage to go out on her first date with a woman. Since then, she had dated a handful of other women and only had one date with a man. Jane had kept this change in her dating habits private, and none of her friends, coworkers, or family members had any idea that she had begun to see women. It wasn't that Jane was ashamed of what she was doing, but she wanted the chance to figure out her feelings for herself, before she invited everyone else to weigh in on her life.

The one thing that Jane did know for certain was that, regardless of the label that she or others might ultimately choose to attach to her, she was most definitely attracted to the beauty and grace of the female form. And as far as Jane was concerned, there was no more perfect example of the female form than Dr. Maura Isles. Because of this, Jane couldn't help but be drawn to the charming medical examiner. There were even times, crazy times admittedly, but times nevertheless when Jane considered revealing her attraction to women in general, and Maura in particular, to her friend. However, even though she didn't believe that the medical examiner would be upset by the revelation, for a variety of reasons, Jane had remained silent. First and foremost, she had chosen to keep her feelings to herself because, although she was reasonably confident about how Maura would react, she wasn't absolutely certain. The last thing Jane wanted to do was to in any way risk or even put a strain on her friendship with the medical examiner. The second issue was that, as far as Jane knew, Maura wasn't interested in women and only dated men. Of course, all of Jane's friends and family would say the same thing about the detective. That fact notwithstanding, though, Jane had no concrete evidence that Maura could be attracted to any woman, let alone to her.

Unfortunately, even if the medical examiner was interested in women as well as men, as far as Jane was concerned, Maura was so far out of her league that it was ridiculous to even consider such a match. Maura was like a starting pitcher on the Boston Red Sox, while Jane was just some poor schlub toiling in Single-A ball. Still, there were moments, especially when they were alone together like they were now, that Jane allowed herself to wonder what it might be like to date someone like Maura Isles.

Knowing that no good could come from such thoughts, Jane did what she always did and pushed them aside and focused on the conversation she was having with her friend. "If he was so interesting, why were you home by one o'clock?"

"I had a very early conference call this morning with a professor of forensics sciences at Cambridge. I didn't want to stay out too late."

"Wow, that sounds like a great way to start off the new year," Jane said.

Maura shrugged matter-of-factly. "I've had worse. Besides, after the call was over, I had a nice breakfast with Tommy and then went for a short run."

Jane immediately scowled at the mention of her youngest brother. Tommy was as bad if not worse around Maura than any of the men at the damn charity event. Between the lecherous looks and the pathetic come-ons, Jane had lost count of the number of times that she had had to restrain herself from punching him in the face over his lack of proper respect for the medical examiner. "What was Tommy doing at your house first thing in the morning?"

Maura took a sip of her wine before answering. "He came over to get the things your mother threw out the window last night. She sent him over so that my first visitor of the new year–"

"Would be a tall, dark-haired man," Jane finished, rolling her eyes in exasperation.

"You forgot good-looking," Maura teased, "But yes."

The detective made an involuntary face in response to Maura's comment about her brother being good-looking, before shaking her head at her mother's actions. "God she's unbelievable sometimes," Jane muttered. It was another one of Angela's superstitions. The first person to enter someone's home after the stroke of midnight would determine the kind of year that they would have. For good luck, the "first footer" was supposed to be tall, dark-haired, good-looking, and most definitely male. Sending Tommy over to Maura's house in the morning, though, was going too far. Jane was definitely going to talk to her mother about it the next time she saw her.

The detective stood up and picked up their empty plates and then took them over to the sink to rinse, before placing them in the dishwasher. "Too bad things didn't go better with Mr. Environmental Lawyer. He could have been your first visitor."

"Oh that wouldn't have worked at all," Maura replied.

Jane turned around and leaned back against the sink. "Why not? Wasn't he good-looking enough?"

"Devastatingly handsome actually, but he's blond."

Jane gasped and placed her hand over her heart. "The horror!"

Maura laughed. "He had a friend at the party. If you'd come with me–"

"I would have been bored, uncomfortable, and miserable, and I probably would have made you miserable too." Jane straightened up and walked over to the fridge to get a beer. A part of her had hoped that Maura would say that the lawyer was not attractive, but deep down, Jane knew that had been unlikely. After all, Maura was drop dead gorgeous, so it was only logical that anyone who caught her eye would be ridiculously good-looking as well. Jane opened up her beer and took a drink. "Trust me. I was much happier here, drinking beer, eating pizza, and watching TV in an old t-shirt and sweatpants."

Maura watched as Jane took another drink. "And red underwear?" she asked, a twinkle in her eye.

Jane nearly choked. "Oh my god!" she exclaimed, as she wiped beer off of her chin. "_Please_ tell me that she did not buy you underwear for New Year's Eve!"

Maura laughed, enjoying Jane's discomfort. "No, of course she didn't. She just made sure that I knew the importance of wearing red underwear on New Year's Eve to ensure good luck in the coming year. I take it from your question, though, that she bought underwear for you."

"Boundaries woman!" Jane exclaimed. The last thing she had any intention of discussing with Maura were the details regarding her underwear. Such a discussion would inevitably lead to discussing Maura's undergarment situation, and that was definitely not a conversation that Jane was prepared to have. "God, you're as bad as my mother."

Maura regarded her friend with amusement, as she took another sip of her wine. "So," she said, resting her chin on her hand. "Did you make any New Year's resolutions?"

Jane snorted. "No, why would I do that?"

Maura tilted her head slightly to the side. "About half of Americans make New Year's resolutions each year in an attempt to make changes in their lives."

"So you're saying I need to change who I am?" Jane asked, feigning a look of hurt. "And here I thought you liked me for who I was."

Maura arched an eyebrow at her friend's attempt to bait her. "What I'm saying is that everyone has room for improvement in their lives. For example, you could resolve to eat better."

"Oh I think we both know that won't happen," Jane said. "On the other hand, _you_ could resolve to bug me less about eating better."

"Oh I think we both know _that_ won't happen," Maura replied wryly.

Jane took a long pull from her beer and then frowned slightly. "What's the point of making New Year's resolutions anyway? No one ever actually keeps them."

"That's not true," Maura said. "Approximately ten percent of people are successful in achieving their resolutions each year."

"Wow. Ten percent?" Jane asked, her voice laced with sarcasm. "Well sign me up then. I'll be a better, more fulfilled human being in no time. In the meantime, though, I think I'll just watch a movie. You want to stay and watch with me?"

"I assume you're planning on watching _Die Hard_?"

"Of course, it's New Year's Day."

"That movie doesn't take place on New Year's Day. It takes place on Christmas."

Jane walked over to her DVDs and began searching through them. It took her only a few moments to find the one she wanted. "That's not the point. It's a tradition to watch my favorite movie on the first day of the year."

Maura watched Jane put the DVD into the player and then pick up the remote. "Tradition, or superstition?"

Jane turned to face her friend before responding. "Tradition," she said emphatically.

"So it wouldn't be 'bad luck' for you not to watch it?" Maura teased.

"Only for you, because I'll be grumpy if I don't watch it."

"Well I certainly wouldn't want to ever experience 'grumpy Jane,' Maura said with a smirk. She rose to her feet and walked over to sit down on the couch. "But I get to pick the movie next time."

"Fine," Jane agreed, as she moved to sit beside Maura. She waited impatiently for the DVD to cycle through the opening "commercials" and disclaimers, until finally the first menu appeared. Just as she was about to hit play, however, Maura reached out and placed her hand over the remote.

"Wait."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just had an idea. Studies show that setting specific small goals is better than just planning to generally become better at life."

Jane groaned and shook her head. "Seriously, Maura? The resolution thing again?"

"Hear me out. How about if we agree that in each month of 2015, we'll both learn something new and eat something new–"

"Fine," Jane interrupted, ready to agree to almost anything if it meant she could watch her movie. "For January I'll learn a new way to play solitaire and I'll eat deep fried bacon. I've always wanted to try deep fried bacon." She aimed the remote at the player and hit play.

Maura sighed in frustration. "I wasn't finished." The medical examiner waited a few moments for Jane to look at her, but the detective pointedly ignored her friend and kept her attention focused on the TV. "Jane," she said warningly, after several seconds had passed.

"After the movie," Jane said, waving the hand that was holding the remote at the blonde dismissively.

Maura reached out and snatched the remote from Jane's grasp and hit pause. "I wasn't finished."

Jane slowly turned to face her friend, an incredulous look on her face. "Give me the remote."

"No."

"Maura," Jane half growled. "Give me the remote."

The medical examiner's left eyebrow arched defiantly. "No," she said slowly and deliberately. She shifted slightly away from the detective and placed the hand holding the remote behind her back. "Not until you let me finish."

Jane knew that the sensible thing would be to simply allow Maura to say whatever it was that she wanted to say, get the remote back, and then watch the movie in peace. The challenge she could see in Maura's eyes, however sparked a need inside Jane to meet that challenge head on. "Last chance," she said, holding out her hand. "Give me the remote."

Maura lifted her chin slightly, obviously daring Jane to make her move. "Not until you let me finish," she repeated, carefully enunciating each word.

Jane leaned closer, her eyes never leaving her friend's. "One."

A slow smile began to play at the corners of Maura's lips.

"Two," Jane warned, her voice lowering to a deep rumble. Her body tensed as she prepared to launch her attack.

"Listen to my proposal, or I will point out the huge plot hole in _Die Hard_," Maura said calmly.

Jane immediately froze. "You wouldn't dare."

"Try me."

Jane clenched her jaw in frustration. She hated giving in to anyone for any reason, but the last thing she wanted was for Maura to ruin her favorite movie by pointing out something that Jane had never noticed about it. After all, she hadn't been able to watch _The Karate Kid_ ever since a puzzled Maura had asked how Ralph Macchio had won the tournament using a kick to the face, when they had said over and over during the tournament that kicks to the face were illegal.

"I just have to listen?" Jane ground out through her teeth.

"Yes."

With a muttered oath, Jane sat back and impatiently gestured at her friend to speak. "Alright, finish what you wanted to say."

Maura tried to hide her triumphant grin, but she was only partially successful in doing so. "I propose that each month, we agree to learn something new and eat something new, but _I'll_ pick what _you_ have to learn and eat, and _you_ pick what_ I_ have to learn and eat."

"That's it? Nothing else?"

"That's it," Maura agreed.

Jane held her hand out expectantly. When Maura placed the remote in her grasp, Jane turned so that she was once again facing the TV. "Absolutely not," she said, as she hit play to start the movie.

Maura stared at her friend for a moment. "Why not?"

"Because I don't want to," Jane replied petulantly.

Maura shook her head and reached for the remote, but Jane quickly extended her arm to hold it beyond the medical examiner's reach.

"Jane–"

"The agreement was that I would listen, not that I would do it."

"Jane."

The detective closed her eyes briefly when she heard Maura use her caring, gentle tone of voice that Jane was powerless to resist, and then hit the pause button. Jane sighed and turned to face her friend. "Give me one reason why I should agree to do that."

"Because it would be good for you, for both of us, to try new things," Maura replied without hesitation.

"And do you have peer-reviewed papers to back up that hypothesis?" Jane asked, her eyes wide and earnest.

"As a matter of fact, I do. If you'd like I could bring them to work tomorrow…and you don't actually care about the papers, do you?" Maura finished ruefully.

"No, I really don't," Jane replied, running a hand through her hair in mild frustration. "How about this…you've been after me for years to take a real vacation, so why don't we go somewhere together for a week this summer, and that can be our new thing to do?"

"We can do that too."

"No, not 'too'…instead. We could do that instead," Jane urged. "Maura, I like my life. Why should I make any changes? I'm perfectly content."

The medical examiner studied her friend thoughtfully. "Content?" she finally asked. "Is that really what you're looking for out of life, Jane? Just to be content?"

The words were softly spoken, but there was something about the way that Maura had said them that made Jane suddenly realize that it was a question that at some point, she was going to have to answer at least for herself. She had been drifting through her life for a long time now, and that fact hadn't really bothered her. But maybe it was time that she figured out what she really wanted out of life and go after it.

"I don't know," Jane said at last. "I guess I haven't really thought about it."

Maura shifted closer to her friend and placed her hand on the detective's knee. "Please Jane? Say you'll give this a try."

Jane looked over at the blonde, a resigned expression on her face. "So the reason for doing this is what exactly?"

Maura smiled. "To get us out of our comfort zones."

"Our 'comfort zones'?"

Maura nodded. "Yes, comfort zones. Situations where a person feels comfortable, secure, and in control."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Jane said with a slightly nervous laugh.

"There are certainly some benefits to operating within your comfort zone, and truthfully, I usually prefer to stay well within mine," Maura confessed. "But the fact is that comfort zones create mental boundaries that can lead to an unsupported sense of security. From time to time, it's a good idea to step outside of them. Sometimes, taking chances is the only way to get what you want out of life."

Jane's brow furrowed, as she looked at her friend. "And what is it _you_ want out of life, Maura?"

The medical examiner shook her head. "Honestly, I don't know either. But I do know that I want more than just to be 'content'."

"And you somehow think learning new skills and trying new foods is going to help us to change our lives for the better?" Jane asked skeptically.

"Making changes in your life is never easy, Jane, but you have to start somewhere. This seems like as good a place as any to start."

The detective lowered her head and considered her options. Almost immediately, she realized that she had none. Maura had been able to get her to do ridiculous things that no one else possibly could for years. This wasn't going to be any different. God help her; she was already whipped and the two of them weren't even actually involved.

Jane shook her head and exhaled heavily. "Wow, I am really going to regret this," she muttered.

A slow smile began to appear on Maura's face. "So you'll do it?"

"I'll do it," Jane agreed, "But only on three conditions."

"Ok, what are your conditions?"

"First, if either of us doesn't learn what we're supposed to learn, or eat what we're supposed to eat, then the deal's off."

Maura crossed her arms and looked at her friend suspiciously. "And what's going to keep you from just refusing to eat the first thing I pick for you so that you can get out of the deal?"

Jane grinned. "You actually think I'm going to let you beat me at this?"

Maura laughed, acknowledging the truth behind Jane's question. The detective was far too competitive to simply give up and allow Maura to win by default. "Alright. What's the second condition?"

"I'll eat _regular_ healthy food that is served in _regular_ people's restaurants and in _regular_ people's homes, but I'm not eating bugs and snails and other weird, slimy things."

"Actually, although snail meat is quite healthy, escargot itself is generally prepared in such a way as to add a considerable amount of cholesterol and fat to the dish. But I understand what you mean," Maura continued hastily, seeing Jane about to deliver an eyeroll of epic proportions, "And I agree. Fish, fruits, grains, vegetables, and fungus only."

"_Fungus_?" Jane demanded.

"Mushrooms are fungus and they are not weird or slimy."

"Alright, mushrooms," Jane agreed grudgingly. "But no other 'fungus'."

"And the third condition?"

"You promise that you will never, _ever_, tell me the plot hole in _Die Hard_."

Maura grinned. "I promise."

"All right, then," Jane said, sighing slightly in defeat. "I'll do it."

Even as she verbally agreed, however, Jane found herself mentally groaning at the entire idea. She reminded herself, though, that they were only talking about once a month. Besides, she could surely break Maura before this went on for too long. All she had to do was pick completely pointless things for Maura to learn, and greasy, fatty, sugar-laden things for her to eat. The cerebral, health-conscious medical examiner would be desperate to call the resolution off in no time. To that end, Jane racked her brain for a suitably idiotic skill to assign to her friend to learn. After several seconds, the perfect choice came to her. "Pen spinning."

"What?" Maura asked, confused by the detective's non sequitur.

"Pen spinning. That's the skill I want you to learn this month."

"What on Earth is 'pen spinning'?"

"Exactly what it sounds like," Jane said. "Spinning a pen around your fingers. Look it up and learn five different tricks."

Maura nodded, accepting the challenge. "Alright. I want you to learn to speak Italian."

"I can't learn a foreign language in a month," the detective protested.

"I understand that. Learn four phrases that would be useful while on vacation and then one more phrase of your choice."

Jane's eyes narrowed. "Vacation? It was either vacation or the resolution, not both."

"I thought it was both," Maura replied, "But in any case, I'm not planning on taking you to Italy this year. It's always good to start preparing for the future, though."

Jane considered Maura's choice. Learning to speak five phrases in Italian wouldn't actually be all that hard. Although her parents had rarely spoken Italian, her grandparents had immigrated to the United States from Italy when they were young, and Jane had heard the language spoken frequently when she was a child. "The fifth phrase can be anything I want?"

"Yes, but you're going to have to tell me what you're saying, so I'd appreciate it if it wasn't completely obscene."

Jane grinned at her friend. "Alright, I'll learn to speak some Italian. What do I have to eat?"

"A spinach salad."

"Oh come on Maura. I hate spinach."

"It won't be that bad. I know a place that makes a spinach salad you'll love."

"Careful Maura," Jane grumbled. "You don't want to give yourself hives."

"I'm not lying. We'll go there for lunch next week."

Jane grimaced, but nodded her head in acceptance. From what she vaguely recalled, spinach salad usually involved hard boiled eggs, bits of bacon, and sometimes bacon dressing. She'd be able to eat one small spinach salad. "Fine, and for your special January meal, I want you to eat a fried bologna sandwich."

"A what?"

"Don't worry," Jane said, fighting back a smirk at the thought of Maura's reaction when she had her first bite of the fried bologna goodness. "I'll explain what it is when I make it for you." She knew full well that Maura would look up the sandwich on the internet when she got home and would be dreading the thought of eating it the moment she saw it. '_We may not even make it to February with this stupid resolution_.'

Knowing that she had no alternative but to go along with Jane's choice, Maura nodded. "A fried bologna sandwich it is." She extended her hand to Jane to complete the deal.

Jane hesitated for a moment. "So do you really want to go on vacation together?"

"Of course."

Jane considered the idea for a few moments. She knew if she protested, Maura would probably agree to drop the issue and would never bring it up again. After all, the medical examiner had already gotten Jane to agree to the resolution. If Jane were honest with herself, though, she'd have to admit that the idea of spending a vacation somewhere with Maura actually did sound like a great idea. "Alright," she said at last.

Decision made, Jane took Maura's hand in her own and shook it briefly. When Maura tried to release the detective's hand, however, Jane held on. "You're not taking me anywhere for vacation."

"I don't understand. You just agreed to go on vacation with me."

"I agreed that I will take vacation time, and that I will go someplace with you. But you are not _taking_ me on vacation. We'll go someplace that I can afford."

"Jane–"

"No, Maura, I mean it," Jane said, cutting the other woman off before she could voice any protest. "You want us to get out of our comfort zones, fine. But letting you pay for me to go on some extravagant vacation that costs more than I make in six months is too much. I could never be…well I could never be comfortable with something like that."

Maura smiled her acceptance. "Alright. We'll come up with someplace that we can both agree on that is within your budget. Is it a deal?"

"It's a deal."


	2. Epiphany

**January 6 - Epiphany**

"You got extra cheese and extra pepperoni on my half, right?" Jane asked, pulling out two plates from the cupboard and placing them on Maura's kitchen island.

"No. I got extra pepperoni, but not extra cheese," Maura replied, as she deposited the pizza box next to the plates. She walked over to her wine cabinet and began looking over the available options. "It's bad enough to add an increased risk of high blood pressure from all the salt in the pepperoni. I'm not going to add an increased risk of raising your cholesterol from the cheese too."

Jane opened Maura's fridge. "You owe me both after that salad," she grumbled, searching for a beer.

"The salad wasn't that bad, Jane," Maura replied distractedly, preoccupied with selecting a bottle of wine to accompany her meal.

Jane shut the refrigerator door forcefully. "Not that bad?" she exclaimed incredulously. "There was no bacon dressing, no bits of bacon, and no egg."

"I never said there would be," Maura replied, not understanding the other woman's grievance. Decision made on the evening's refreshment, she pulled out a bottle of Pinot Noir and turned around to face her friend. "All I said was that we were going out for a spinach salad."

"Exactly!" Jane shot back, a triumphant note in her voice. She used the bottle opener hanging on the side of the fridge to open her beer and then took a long drink. "Spinach salad is supposed to have bacon bits and egg in it."

"Spinach salad is supposed to have _spinach_ in it," Maura corrected her friend. "Anything else is based on the chef's imagination and inspiration."

"'Imagination and…,' Jane sputtered indignantly. "It had _strawberries_ in it, Maura. And oranges…and kiwi! Who the hell puts kiwi in a salad?"

Maura heaved a long suffering sigh. She'd heard nothing but complaints from Jane ever since the salad in question had been placed in front of the detective at lunch that afternoon. The medical examiner opened a drawer and took out a corkscrew. With practiced ease, she began to open the wine. "You like strawberries and oranges–"

"NOT on salad!" Jane practically growled.

"And you could have pushed the kiwi to the side," Maura continued unfazed, uncorking the bottle.

Jane stopped in mid retort. "Wait…what? I thought I had to eat all of it. Why didn't you tell me I could skip the kiwi?"

Maura shrugged negligently, while she poured a glass of wine for herself. "You never asked," she pointed out, struggling to hold back a smile.

Jane's eyes narrowed. "You think that's funny?"

Maura coughed to cover up a laugh. "I don't find it 'unfunny,'" she admitted. The medical examiner pushed the pizza box towards the other woman, before taking a sip of her wine. "It was one meal out of the entire month, Jane. You'll be fine, even without extra cholesterol on your pizza."

In response, the detective opened the box and grabbed a piece of pizza. Locking eyes with Maura, she folded the slice in half and took an enormous bite.

Maura shook her head in exasperation and crossed her arms over her chest. "Slow down," she admonished, her lips thinning into a grim line. "I'm not going to save you if you choke."

Jane washed part of her food down with a healthy chug of beer, and then stuffed even more pizza into her mouth. "Yeah you will," she mumbled confidently.

Maura arched an eyebrow at her friend. "You sound certain about that."

It took several seconds for Jane to finish all the food she had in her mouth. "I am," she said. She put another slice on her plate and moved to sit down at the kitchen island. "You need me," she finished with a wink and a cheeky grin.

Jane's sudden flash of good humor momentarily caught the medical examiner off guard, but almost immediately she found herself smiling back at her friend for two completely different reasons. First, she realized the detective wasn't actually all that upset about what she had had to eat for lunch. Jane's tirade about the spinach salad had mainly been for the sake of appearance to preserve her image as someone who only consumed completely unhealthy food. Second, the blonde had to admit that her friend was right; Maura definitely needed Jane in her life.

For the longest time, Maura had believed that she was destined to go through life surrounded only by casual acquaintances and work colleagues. Having never had a best friend or even particularly close friends growing up, she had seen nothing unusual about such an arrangement. She had even managed to make herself believe that she wasn't missing out on anything important without close friends and family surrounding her. After all, it was hard to miss something that she had never really had.

But then she had met Jane: stubborn, impulsive, kind, amazing Jane. And meeting Jane had changed everything for Maura.

Of course, their friendship hadn't happened overnight. Maura had been far too socially awkward when they had first met to have been capable of such a thing. But from the moment that Dr. Isles, Chief Medical Examiner, had been formally introduced to Detective Rizzoli, newest member of the BPD homicide unit, Maura had found herself drawn to Jane in a way that she had never been drawn to anyone else before. The raven-haired Italian had filled a hole inside of her that Maura hadn't even realized existed, and the friendship they had formed had become the most important relationship Maura had ever had. The simple truth was that she honestly couldn't imagine what she would do if Jane were no longer a part of her life.

"Yeah, well don't push it," Maura replied with mock sternness, as she placed a slice of pizza on her plate and moved to sit down beside her friend. She took a small bite and watched as Jane continued to devour her second piece. Realizing that the only possible way to slow the other woman down was to engage her in conversation, Maura asked the first thing that came into her mind. "Have you learned to speak any Italian yet?" she asked, not really expecting the other woman to say yes.

Jane, however, surprised her. "As a matter of fact, I've learned two phrases," she said, pushing the food in her mouth to the side so that she could speak. "Want to hear them?"

"Of course," Maura replied, delighted that at least with respect to the matter of learning new skills, Jane was showing actual interest and initiative.

Jane swallowed her food and then cleared her throat. _"Dove si trova la stazione di polizia?" _she said slowly and carefully.

Maura regarded her friend with a look of disbelief. "Really? 'Where's the police station?' That's the first thing you decided to learn how to say?"

Jane looked at Maura in surprise. "How did you know what I said?"

"For one thing, I speak French, and Italian is fairly close. For another, '_stazione di polizia_' isn't exactly hard to figure out. Honestly, Jane, out of every phrase you could have chosen to learn, that's the one you picked?"

Jane's grin was not the least bit apologetic. "Hey, you never know what might happen on vacation," the detective replied. "Want to hear the second phrase I learned?"

Maura sighed in resignation. "Probably not, but let me hear it anyway."

Jane sat up perfectly straight and composed her features into a mask of complete seriousness._ "Dov'è la toilette?"_

Maura poked the inside of her cheek with her tongue and counted to three before speaking. _"_Let me guess. 'Where's the bathroom?'"

"Yup," Jane replied, her eyes gleaming with amusement. "You can't possibly disagree with the importance of that phrase."

Maura closed her eyes and drew in a slow, deep breath. Technically, she couldn't fault Jane's choices. After all, they were phrases that could in fact be useful on vacation. It was just that she had expected the other woman to take their New Year's resolution more seriously, and by extension, take their agreement to try to make positive changes in their lives and move out of their comfort zones more seriously as well. It was obvious, though, that as usual, Jane was choosing to fight all efforts to try to improve herself, while taking advantage of the chance to needle Maura and try to get under her skin.

As tempting as it was to be frustrated by the fact that Jane was clearly messing with her, though, Maura couldn't find it in her to be upset. It was in Jane's very makeup to mock and ridicule, and when all else failed, use sarcasm as a way of protecting herself when challenged. Maura had essentially thrown down the gauntlet and dared the detective to try to change part of who she was. It was only natural that Jane's first reaction would be to resist as strongly as she could. Maura remained hopeful, though, that if she was patient, Jane would eventually come around and see the resolution not as a challenge to be defeated, but rather an opportunity to be embraced.

"_Parfois, vous êtes un enfant idiot, mais je ne sais pas ce que je ferais sans toi,_" Maura said affectionately.

Jane had been about to take another bite of her pizza, but she paused in mid motion when she heard Maura's comment. The detective's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What was that?"

Maura smiled and reached out to place her hand lightly on the detective's forearm. "I said I like you," she answered, deliberately "paraphrasing" her statement.

Jane continued to watch the other woman carefully. "I'm pretty sure I heard the word 'idiot' in there."

"I definitely did not say 'idiot,'" Maura replied solemnly, deliberately pronouncing the word with an American accent so that her denial was not an actual lie.

The knowing gleam in the detective's eyes told the medical examiner that Jane was well aware of what Maura had done, but was choosing to let it pass. "So I've learned two of my five phrases. What about you? How's the pen spinning coming along?"

Maura shrugged and grimaced slightly. "I've found several websites that identify various tricks. It seems like a rather pointless activity though."

Jane took a long pull on her beer. "And have you learned any of those tricks yet?" she asked innocently.

Maura wasn't fooled. She could see the smug expression on Jane's face, and it confirmed what Maura had suspected for the last couple of days: that Jane had intentionally chosen a ridiculous skill for her to learn in an attempt to annoy her. Not wanting to give her friend the satisfaction of objecting, Maura simply filed the fact away to deal with at a later time. "Not yet."

"You're falling behind, Maura," Jane taunted. "I've already learned two phrases. Don't forget, five tricks or the resolution is off."

Knowing that her failure was exactly what the detective was hoping for, Maura waved her hand confidently. "Don't worry," she replied. "I'll learn them."

"Well good luck with that," Jane said, the tone of her voice making it clear she was certain that Maura would fail. She took one last bite of her second piece of pizza and then dropped the remaining crust onto her plate. For a few seconds, she studied the pizza box thoughtfully, and then shook her head slightly, apparently deciding that for the moment at least, two pieces made enough of a statement regarding her disdain for her lunch.

Hunger sated at least for the time being, Jane turned to look around Maura's home. "So you took all your Christmas decorations down yesterday while I was stuck at the precinct wrapping up the D'Amato case?"

Maura picked up both of their plates and began walking over to the trash. "Yes, I did. When I was a child, my mother was adamant that Christmas decorations had to come down by Epiphany, so it just seems wrong to me to see them up any longer."

Jane watched as Maura tossed the uneaten crusts into the garbage and then placed the plates in the dishwasher. "The lights are still up on your house, though. I thought the guys you hired to take away the tree were going to take care of those too."

"That was the plan, but the service I hired wasn't able to get over here yesterday. Several of their employees have called in with the flu so they're running behind. They won't be here until later this week to take the lights down."

Jane's brow lifted questioningly. "Then what happened to your tree?"

Noticing that Jane's beer was almost gone, Maura walked over to the fridge. "It was getting too dry for me to be comfortable having it in the house any longer, so Tommy hauled it away for me."

Maura pulled out a beer for the detective and then opened it for her. As she turned to face her friend, she immediately noticed the irritated expression on the other woman's face. "How did that happen?" Jane asked tersely.

Maura simply shrugged as she handed Jane her beer, and then sat down beside her again. "I mentioned my concern to Angela while we were having coffee yesterday morning, and she called Tommy and asked him to come over and take care of it."

Jane shook her head, obviously not happy with the medical examiner's answer. "Ma shouldn't have done that," she grumbled, before taking a long drink.

"Why not?"

"Because you don't need Tommy hanging around here making a nuisance of himself," Jane replied, her attention focused intently on her bottle of beer.

The medical examiner studied her friend in thoughtful silence. She knew that Jane was sensitive about the idea of Maura and Tommy spending any time together, particularly when that time was spent together alone. Jane had told Maura that she was worried about her reckless, unreliable brother taking advantage of her friend's generous nature. Maura, however, knew that that wasn't Jane's real concern. Jane was afraid that her youngest brother might try to make a move on Maura, and that Maura might not reject his advance.

On the one hand, Maura could understand Jane's apprehension. After all, if Tommy hadn't been related to Jane, he would certainly have been a possible "short-term" romantic interest for Maura. He was tall, good-looking, and despite his past history of troubles, he was a decent man with a good heart. In addition, Maura strongly suspected that Tommy would have no interest in any type of serious, long-term relationship with her, which was frankly the way that she preferred her sexual relationships to work. Objectively, all things being equal, Tommy would actually make a perfect lover for a few weeks or even months.

But all things weren't equal. Tommy wasn't just "some guy," he was her best friend's brother. Getting involved in a purely sexual relationship with Jane's brother would at best be ridiculously awkward for everyone involved, and at worst, could easily destroy her relationship with Jane. Since that was a risk Maura would never be willing to take, there was no possible scenario under which she would consider having sex, or for that matter even kissing, Tommy.

Maura had of course explicitly told Jane that she had no intention of becoming involved with her brother. Despite this, the detective remained so anxious about the topic every time it came up, that Maura had begun to wonder if there was some other reason behind her friend's sensitivity. Maura had painstakingly considered and subsequently discarded countless theories for Jane's behavior for months, until she finally found herself left with only one plausible explanation: the detective's attitude and behavior were far more consistent with someone who was feeling _jealous_ rather than merely protective.

The major problem with this explanation, of course, was that as far as Maura was "officially" aware, Jane had no interest in her or any other woman. As time continued to go by, however, Maura found herself wondering if that particular fact was actually true. There had been more than a few times over the last several months when Maura had been all but certain that she had observed Jane "noticing" other women, including on a few occasions, Maura herself. Of course, the medical examiner couldn't be absolutely certain about what she had seen, and even if Jane had been looking at other women, it was always possible that there was a perfectly good, completely innocent explanation for her actions. Still, Maura would be almost willing to swear that there had been times when she had detected a hunger in Jane's eyes when looking at an attractive woman that couldn't be explained as anything other than pure desire.

Having been attracted to both men and women for as long as she could remember, Maura certainly wasn't bothered by the idea that her best friend might be attracted to women. Truth be told, Maura had found herself entertaining thoughts of what it would be like to cross the line between friends and lovers with the beautiful homicide detective on more than one occasion. But unless she was absolutely certain that Jane was interested in women, Maura wouldn't even consider raising the issue.

Knowing that there were simply too many barriers to get past before the subject could ever even be broached, Maura did what she always did at time like this and dismissed the issue from her mind and instead focused on Jane's concerns regarding Tommy. "He wasn't hanging around making a nuisance of himself," the medical examiner explained patiently. "He came over, helped Angela and me with the Christmas decorations, and then took the tree away to have it composted. That was it."

The tension in Jane's body dissipated noticeably at the mention of her mother. "Ma was here too?" Jane asked, turning to look at her friend.

"The entire time," Maura confirmed.

Jane considered Maura's response for a few moments, and then nodded her head in acceptance. As she did, Maura was once again struck by the fact that it was impossible to determine whether Jane's behavior was a result of her being concerned that her ne'er-do-well brother might hurt her friend, or if it instead was a result of being jealous over the thought that her brother might become romantically involved with someone in which she herself was interested. Before the blonde could pursue that line of thought, however, Jane spoke up, effectively, and Maura immediately knew, deliberately, changing the subject.

"So how did your date go with Jerry go?"

Seeing no point in challenging Jane on the topic change, Maura simply went with it. "It was very nice, actually. _Gerald_ was a wonderful dinner companion," she replied, correcting Jane on her date's name.

"And where did your wonderful dinner companion take you?"

"Craigie on Main."

Jane's eyes widened and she whistled softly in admiration when she heard the name of one of the top French restaurants in Boston. "Not bad for a first date," she said, obviously impressed. "And afterwards what? Coffee? A movie? A long, insanely cold walk along the Charles?"

"We went to see a movie: _National Gallery_."

"Never heard of it," Jane replied, as she took a sip of her beer.

"It's a documentary that takes a behind the scenes look at one of the world's greatest museums, London's National Gallery."

An indignant look immediately appeared on Jane's face. "Dang it Maura!" she swore, slamming her bottle of beer down onto the kitchen island with a loud thump. "You went to see a movie about a museum? I can't believe you didn't save that movie to see with me!"

A faint smile tugged at the medical examiner's lips. There had been a time when she would not have recognized that Jane was teasing her unless and until the detective had explicitly told her that she was kidding. Now however, Maura was able, at least sometimes, to recognize when the other woman was playing with her. That fact filled her with a small sense of comfort and pride in the knowledge that she understood her friend as well as she did.

"I'm sorry," Maura said feigning contriteness, "I promise that next time I'll check with you first."

"Please do," Jane said archly, as she lifted her bottle to take another drink. "It's a little something I like to call manners."

Maura laughed lightly and then got up to refill her glass of wine. Deciding that two glasses would be enough for the night, she returned the bottle to the cabinet, and then turned back to look at Jane. "Are you done eating or should I put the rest of the pizza in the refrigerator?"

"Fridge is fine."

Maura placed the pizza box in the refrigerator and then glanced around the kitchen. Everything appeared to be in order, so she picked up her glass of wine and took a drink. She turned to look at her friend and was about to ask if she was ready to watch the movie, when Jane looked up and cleared her throat. "I'm glad you had a good time," the detective said, her tone quiet and sincere. "Gerald sounds like the kind of person someone like you should be dating."

Maura tilted her head to the side, a quizzical expression on her features. "Someone like me? What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, honestly not certain how she should take the other woman's statement.

Jane shrugged and focused her attention on her beer. "You know, someone smart, classy, kind…beautiful," she replied, picking at the label on the bottle. "You're special, Maura. You shouldn't be wasting your time spending it with someone ordinary."

Maura knew that ostensibly, Jane was talking about her brother. After all, they had been speaking about Tommy right before they began talking about Gerald, and Jane had on more than one occasion made it clear that her youngest brother was not good enough for the medical examiner. But there was something about the way Jane's shoulders were slumped, how she refused to meet Maura's eyes, the bittersweet note in her voice that made Maura think that maybe this wasn't really about Tommy…that maybe this was about Jane not believing that she was good enough for Maura. Unfortunately, even if her suspicions were right, Maura couldn't be certain whether Jane simply didn't believe she was worthy of Maura as a _friend_, or as a _lover_.

Maura walked over to stand beside the other woman. She reached down and took Jane's right hand in her own, and waited patiently for her friend to look up at her. It took several moments, but eventually the detective lifted her head so that she could meet the blonde's gaze. "I'm not," Maura said softly.

Jane's brow furrowed slightly. "Not what?" she asked.

"I'm not wasting my time with someone ordinary. As a matter of fact, I'd say that I spend most of my time with someone rather extraordinary."

Jane entwined her fingers with Maura's and squeezed lightly, silently acknowledging that she recognized the meaning behind the medical examiner's words. Slowly, a smile tipped up one corner of her mouth. "So what movie are we stuck with now that _National Gallery_ is off the list?"

Maura laughed and shook her head. She knew that Jane was again deliberately changing the topic, but since she also knew that the detective was doing so because she was generally uncomfortable dealing with serious emotional issues, she decided it was best to simply accept it again. "_Shakespeare in Love_."

"Wow," Jane said, her voice dripping with sarcasm as she released her grip on Maura's hand. "That sounds like it might be just as good as _National Gallery._"

"It seemed like a logical choice," Maura replied.

"Uh huh. And what logic would that be?"

"Last night was Twelfth Night. From what I understand, the movie references Shakespeare's play _Twelfth Night_ on several different occasions."

"Oh yeah," Jane said rolling her eyes. "That's totally logical."

"Says the person who watches a movie set at Christmas every New Year's Day."

"It's tradition," Jane growled in mock annoyance. "Show some respect."

Maura laughed as she got up and walked into the living room. Placing her glass of wine down on the coffee table, she picked up the remote, turned on the TV, and then pressed the button to get to her Amazon Prime account. Jane followed her friend into the living room, settled down into one corner of the couch, and watched while Maura moved through the various menus to find the movie. "So," Jane asked. "Is this a documentary about Shakespeare's life?"

"No, it's a romantic comedy," Maura replied, pleased with herself for again knowing that Jane was teasing her.

"Ahh, good, because the only thing that could possibly be better than Shakespeare, is a romantic comedy about Shakespeare."

Seeing the title _Shakespeare in Love_ appear onscreen, Maura simply ignored Jane's comment and started the movie. She placed the remote back on the coffee table, picked up her glass of wine, and then sat down on the couch beside her friend. Almost instantly, Jane moved to accommodate the medical examiner. Maura automatically leaned back against the detective, and Jane moved to rest her arm casually around Maura's shoulders. The entire process took place without either woman saying a word, or in any way questioning the act itself. It was, Maura suddenly realized, simply the way they always ended up when they watched a movie. Sometimes it took a while to get here, such as last week when they had been arguing over the resolutions and the remote. But for longer than she could remember, watching a movie with Jane had consisted of cuddling together on the couch, or at least, it did whenever they were alone.

Maura shifted in Jane's embrace to get more comfortable and allowed her head to fall back against the detective's shoulder. "So how much of all that growling and whining about lunch earlier was just for show?"

"Hmmm," Jane murmured thoughtfully, "I'm not sure." She took a sip of beer and continued to watch the opening credits of the movie. "Maybe 70…75%" she finally said, a hint of laughter in her voice.

Maura grinned but remained silent. She had her victory. There was no reason to push any further.

"Don't make me eat kiwi again," Jane suddenly said after nearly a minute had passed.

Maura considered the other woman's statement thoughtfully for a few moments, before turning around to look at her friend. "So does that mean you would be willing to eat that salad again if they left the kiwi off?"

Jane shrugged. "I guess, but give me a couple weeks."

Maura turned back around so that Jane wouldn't see the knowing smile that was beginning to spread across her face. Jane didn't want to admit that she might actually like the salad as long as the one ingredient she had truly objected to was kept off, but that was perfectly fine with the medical examiner. If pretending that she was simply tolerating the salad and not actually enjoying eating something that was good for her was what it took to get her friend to eat healthier, Maura was more than happy to play along. "Ok," she agreed. "We'll go back sometime next month."

"Alright," Jane replied in a tone that implied she didn't really care one way or the other.

The two women continued to watch the credits of the movie in silence, before Jane suddenly spoke up again. "Hey, does that mean–"

"No," Maura replied, cutting the other woman off before she could finish, not bothering to try to hide her amusement. "It won't count as your one healthy thing to try for the month."

"Damn," Jane swore quietly. "Well, I had to try."

"I know. I'd have been a stunned if you hadn't."

_Parfois, vous êtes un enfant idiot, mais je ne sais pas ce que je ferais sans toi.  
><em>Translation: Sometimes you are a silly child, but I don't know what I'd do without you.


	3. Ditch Your New Year's Resolutions Day

**January 16 - The day before Ditch New Year's Resolutions Day **

"Alright, before I start making your sandwich, do you know what tomorrow is?" Jane asked.

Maura frowned slightly, confused by the question. "Saturday, January 17th."

"True, but tomorrow is also 'Ditch New Year's Resolutions Day'," Jane replied.

Maura rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Why am I not surprised that you know that?" she asked dryly.

Jane's face split into a wide grin. "Probably because you know me better than anyone else."

"Mmm hmm. And let me guess. You think I should 'ditch' our resolution."

Jane painted her most sincere expression on her face. "I'm only thinking of you here, Maura," the detective said. "We're over half way through January. You still haven't learned one pen spinning trick yet, so we both know the resolution is going to be called off at the end of the month anyway. At least if you abandon the resolution now, you won't have to eat a fried bologna sandwich too."

Maura nodded thoughtfully, and then rose from her seat to walk over to where she had deposited her purse when the two women had first arrived in Jane's apartment. "That's a generous offer," she said as she opened up her bag. "Especially since you've already learned three of your five phrases and eaten the food I picked out for you."

Jane ordered herself to remain cool and not allow the glee she was feeling to show. She was about to win this stupid resolution/contest. "It's ok. The salad wasn't that bad, and learning a little Italian wasn't that hard."

For a few moments, Maura simply looked at Jane with a grateful smile on her face. Then, without a word, she reached into her purse and pulled out an expensive looking pen. Setting her bag aside, she positioned the writing instrument between the fingers of her right hand.

"Thumbaround," Maura said calmly, as the pen flipped around her thumb several times in rapid succession. She began walking back over to where Jane was standing. "Fingerpass," she said, the pen spinning around and moving back and forth through her fingers. Coming to a stop beside the counter that separated Jane's kitchen and living room, she rested her forearm against the edge with her palm up, allowing Jane a clear view of what she was doing. "Charge," she continued, twirling the pen around and around between the tips of her middle and ring fingers. "Sonic," she said, spinning the pen rapidly from a starting position between the middle and ring finger to an end position between the middle and index finger, and then repeating the motion several more times.

With a superior smirk, Maura placed the pen down on the counter.

Jane quietly picked up the pen and studied it for a few moments, and then looked at her friend. "That was only four."

"I'm still working on 'Shadow.' I'll have it by the end of the month," Maura said confidently.

Jane's lips quirked wryly. She had to admit, she was actually pretty impressed by Maura's skills, as well as the fact that the blonde had known exactly what she was trying to do. "I didn't have you fooled for even a second, did I?"

Maura laughed warmly and richly. "Like you said, I know you better than anyone. Now make the sandwich, and let's get this over with."

Jane put the pen back down on the counter and walked over to turn on the stove. She had lost the battle, but she could still win the war. She had plenty of time to come up with something stupider than pen spinning for the medical examiner to learn next month, and she had already come up with something even worse to eat than a fried bologna sandwich. Maura would throw in the towel by the end of February; victory was merely being delayed a little bit.

The detective placed a pan on top of the stove and then threw in some butter. "Really?" Maura asked, her voice brimming with distaste. "Does it have to be butter? Couldn't you at least use olive oil or canola oil?"

"I could, but it wouldn't be nearly as tasty," Jane replied, biting her lip to keep from grinning. While she waited patiently for the butter to finish melting, she made a cut in the bologna from the middle to one outside edge. "You have to score it so that it stays flat when you fry it."

"Good to know," Maura replied. She sat down at the counter to watch her friend. "I'd hate to be embarrassed by curled up bologna when I make this for my mother the next time she visits."

Jane chuckled and then placed the bologna in the pan. She turned to look at the medical examiner. "So what would you prefer on the bread? Mustard, or mayonnaise?"

"I honestly couldn't have less of a preference," Maura replied.

"Alright, then we'll go half and half. One side mayo, one side mustard. That way you can decide which you like best."

"That's very thoughtful of you," Maura said. She watched Jane spread mustard across one half of a slice of bread and then apply the same treatment to a second. "So what are you doing tomorrow night?"

Jane began spreading mayo on the other halves of each of the pieces of bread. "Why?"

The medical examiner shrugged and leaned back in her chair. "I thought if you weren't doing anything, we could go out for drinks."

Jane looked at Maura in mild confusion. "I thought you had a date with Gerald."

"I did," Maura agreed, "But he had to go to Hartford to depose a witness in an upcoming case, and he won't be back until late Sunday."

"But everything is still going ok with you two?" Jane asked, as she returned the mayonnaise and mustard to the fridge.

"Everything's…fine," Maura replied, her voice flat and noncommittal.

Jane closed the door to the fridge and looked at her friend skeptically. "That doesn't sound particularly convincing."

"Everything _is_ fine," Maura said with a negligent shrug. "But I was hoping for something more than just 'fine' between us physically," she continued meaningfully.

"Oh," Jane said, immediately grasping Maura's not so subtle point. "Sorry to hear he's not rocking your world," she finished lamely, hoping that Maura would end the topic there.

Her hopes were not to be granted. "Don't misunderstand me. It's not as if I haven't reached orgasm with him," Maura explained as matter-of-factly as if she were discussing the stock market or the weather forecast. "But his technique is fairly basic and lacking in imagination. I prefer a lover who's more than merely 'competent.'"

"God, Maura," Jane groaned. "Did I really need to hear that?"

"I thought it best to be clear," Maura replied with a straight face, but Jane could hear the hint of teasing in her voice.

"Did you now?" Jane asked through clenched teeth.

"I did," Maura confirmed sweetly. "And you never answered my question."

"What question?" Jane asked, no longer able to remember what they had been talking about before Maura had given her a status report on Gerald's bedroom capabilities.

"Do you want to go out for drinks with me tomorrow night?" Maura repeated patiently.

"Oh," Jane felt a moment of unease. She had plans that night…plans that involved a woman that the detective had no idea how to explain to her friend. "No…I'm…I'm not really up for going out tomorrow night."

"OK," Maura said slowly, obviously a little puzzled by Jane's response. "We could stay in if you'd prefer. We could get take out or I could cook something."

"No, it's not that…it's just…" It was like she was slowly but inexorably being pulled into quicksand, Jane thought to herself. Maura wasn't going to just let this pass. If Jane didn't figure out a way to stop this and stop this quickly, at the end of the conversation, she was either going to have to tell Maura that she was dating a woman, or she was going to have to tell a direct lie to her best friend. "Actually, I have a date," the detective admitted, not having any idea what else to say, just desperate to buy herself some more time to think.

Maura blinked in shock, but recovered quickly. "That's great," she said, obviously pleased to hear that her friend had met someone who interested her enough to actually agree to go out with them. "Who's the date with?"

Jane couldn't blame the other woman for being momentarily caught off guard. After all, Jane hadn't mentioned dating anyone to Maura in almost five months, which was, not coincidentally, the last time that Jane had gone out on a date with a guy. The detective shook her head negatively, and then turned around and focused her attention on the bologna frying in the pan. "It's no one you know."

Maura laughed lightly. "Alright, but presumably your date has a name."

Jane's tension rose a few more percentage points. She hesitated for a moment before replying. "Erin Richardson."

Maura leaned forward on her elbows, a delighted smile on her lips. "So how did you and Aaron meet?"

Jane knew that Maura had automatically assumed that Erin was a man, and she realized that she had a chance to get out of this without revealing Erin's actual gender. She just had to play this right. "I was taking Jo for a walk and Erin stopped me and asked for directions," Jane said carefully. "We started talking, one thing led to another, and the next thing I knew, Erin was asking me out to dinner."

"Really?" Maura said, her brow furrowing slightly in obvious surprise. "You accepted a request for a date from a perfect stranger?"

"Well I did run a background check first," Jane admitted sheepishly.

Maura got up from her seat to walk over to the refrigerator. "So what does Aaron do for a living?" she asked, as she opened the door and looked inside.

Jane turned and looked at her friend. Maura was facing away from her, trying to find something in the fridge. She began to respond, to give the medical examiner a non-committal, vague, deliberately misleading answer that would preserve her secret. In a sudden flash of awareness, however, Jane realized that she didn't want to do that. She couldn't keep doing this. She couldn't keep worrying that at some point, she was going to say the wrong thing and give her secret away. She was tired of hiding this part of who she was from her best friend.

"She's a visiting history professor from NYU," Jane said, relieved that her voice actually sounded reasonably steady.

Maura immediately turned around to stare at her friend. "You're dating someone from New York City?"

For a split second, Jane thought that Maura had missed the fact that the detective had said "she." As she continued to hold Maura's gaze, however, the warmth, understanding, and absolute acceptance she could see in Maura's eyes told Jane more clearly than words ever could that her friend had heard exactly what she had said. Maura had heard, and she was completely unfazed by the fact that Jane was dating a woman.

"She's not really a New Yorker," Jane said, doing her best to speak normally. "She's originally from Ohio."

"Oh," Maura said, tilting her head slightly as she considered Jane's explanation. Eventually, she slowly nodded in acceptance. "I guess that's ok then."

Feeling her emotions threatening to overwhelm her, Jane turned away from her friend. She picked up a spatula and flipped the bologna over as she struggled to regroup. She heard Maura pull something out of the fridge before shutting the door and walking back over to sit at the counter. She hadn't realized just how scared she had been to admit the truth out loud to someone else, but as usual, Maura had managed to make everything ok.

"Thanks," Jane eventually said gruffly, her head still lowered.

Several seconds of silence followed, before the medical examiner finally spoke. "I love you, you know," Maura said quietly, her voice filled with affection.

Jane swallowed to get past the tightness in her throat. She glanced over her shoulder to look at her friend. "I know," she said. "I love you too."

Maura's lips curved into a warm smile. "I know."

Jane drew in a deep breath and then slowly let it out again, releasing the remaining tension in her body. She turned to pick up the piece of cheese she had placed on the counter and began to unwrap it. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a look of unmistakable horror appear on Maura's face at the sight of the processed cheese slice. "I was just going to use one piece," she said, trying to maintain a solemn expression but unable to keep a grin from appearing on her face. "I can use two if you prefer."

"No, one piece will be fine," Maura assured the detective. She took a sip from the bottle of water she had taken from the fridge. "So how long have you and Erin been dating?" her voice reflecting nothing more than honest, genuine curiosity.

Jane shrugged. "Not long. I met her around the beginning of December, but we've only been out a few times."

"Is she the first woman you've ever dated?"

Jane felt a sinking feeling in her gut. She had managed to successfully navigate one pitfall, but now she was faced with another. She was going to have to admit to Maura that this wasn't a recent development. She had kept this a secret from her best friend for months, and now she was going to have to admit that fact. Maura was going to feel incredibly hurt that Jane hadn't trusted her with this. "No, I've been dating women since last March," she confessed.

Maura nodded absently, a pensive expression on her face. "Are you still dating men too?"

It was a question Jane had been asking herself for months, and she had been unable to come up with an answer. When she heard the question coming from Maura, however, she suddenly realized that she did in fact know the truth. "No, I'm not," Jane replied.

Seeing Maura deep in thought as she realized what Jane had kept from her, the detective's guilt began to overwhelm her. "I'm sorry," Jane said in a rush, stepping away from the stove and over to the counter. "I didn't think about how you would feel–"

"No," Maura interrupted quietly but firmly. "You don't owe me any apologies."

"I should have told you sooner–"

Maura reached out and gently took her friend by the hand, effectively silencing the detective. "You told me when you were ready to tell me," she said, her thumb stroking the back of Jane's hand lightly. "You were under no obligation to tell me any sooner than that."

Jane drew in a shaky breath. Once again, Maura had managed to make everything ok. She closed her eyes briefly and squeezed Maura's hand. Slowly, she opened her eyes to look at her friend. "You're the first person I've told," she said softly.

Maura nodded perceptively, as she tightened her grip on the detective's hand. "Are you worried about telling your family?"

"I'm not worried about telling Frankie or Tommy, but Ma…" Jane shook her head. "I don't know how she's going to react."

A small, reassuring smile appeared on Maura's lips. "Give her some credit, Jane. She didn't have any problem with the relationship between Detective Frost's mother and her girlfriend."

Jane chuckled darkly. "Yeah, but neither of them were her only daughter."

Jane released her grip on Maura's hand, straightened up, and walked back over to the stove so that she could put the cheese on the bologna. Maura watched her friend for a few moments before speaking again. "She'll be ok with it."

Jane exhaled heavily. "You can't be sure of that."

"Yes I can."

Jane turned to face the medical examiner. "How?"

"Because you're her only daughter, and I know she loves you." Seeing that the detective remained unconvinced, Maura quickly continued. "It's ok, Jane. I'm not trying to push you. You don't need to talk to her about it before you're ready."

Jane simply nodded. Despite what Maura might believe, Jane was far from convinced that her mother would accept the news easily. She knew at some point she was going to have to tell her family though. To believe otherwise was nothing more than to continue to live in denial, and she was through with that.

Silence filled the room as both women considered everything that had just transpired. After about a half a minute, Jane noticed that the edges of the bologna were nice and crispy, so she turned off the stove and used a spatula to remove the meat from the pan. She carefully placed the bologna on one piece of bread and then with a small flourish dropped the second piece of bread on top. "_Voilà_!" she said with a proud grin, as she set the plate in front of her friend. "Would you like some wine to go with your meal?"

The expression on Maura's face as she stared at the sandwich could only be described as something akin to absolute dread. She glanced up at the other woman briefly and shook her head. "The water will do. I'm not wasting a glass of wine on this…thing."

Jane smirked at her friend and gestured at the sandwich. "Alright then. Give it a try."

Maura took another drink of water, and then unfolded her napkin and placed it on her lap. She stared at the sandwich for a few seconds more, clearly psyching herself up, and then picked it up and took a bite. She chewed slowly, her features controlled and practically stoic.

Jane watched her friend in open amusement. "So, what do you think?"

Maura swallowed the food in her mouth and then took a long drink of water. "It's…" Her voice trailed off, as she struggled to find the appropriate words to describe the experience.

"Delicious?" Jane supplied helpfully, seeing her friend unable to come up with a proper descriptor.

"Disgusting," Maura countered, her face finally twisting into a grimace.

Jane laughed and took the sandwich from her friend. She placed it back on the plate and then used a knife to cut the sandwich in half. "I assume you won't mind sharing."

Maura smiled gratefully, although the expression on her face made it clear she was not thrilled with what she still had left to eat.

Jane picked up her half of the sandwich and then walked over to the refrigerator to get a beer. The detective took a long pull from the bottle and then leaned against the fridge. She began to eat her half of the sandwich while watching Maura do the same. Thoughts of the last five minutes raced through her brain. She was beyond relieved about how everything had gone. She had "come out" to her best friend, and Maura had not only accepted the news without batting any eye, she had made it alright that Jane hadn't told her right away. The more she continued to think about Maura's reaction, however, the more Jane realized that she had a question of her own to ask.

Maura continued to slowly eat the sandwich, pausing between each bite to take a long drink of water. When she was down to the last bite, Jane finally spoke. "Have you ever dated a woman?"

Maura placed the remaining piece of the sandwich on her plate. "As a matter of fact, I have," she replied evenly. "But I don't date women anymore."

Jane's brow furrowed slightly in thought. Maura wasn't offering any explanation for her statement, but her attitude didn't make it seem as if she was bothered by Jane's question either. "Because you aren't attracted to women anymore?" she asked.

An irresistibly devastating grin appeared on Maura's face. "No," she said, as she allowed her gaze to casually slide down Jane's body before rising to meet the detective's again. "I definitely still find women attractive."

The meaning of Maura's words and actions weren't lost on the detective. She felt her heart begin to hammer in her chest as she felt herself flush. Still, Maura's response only made things more confusing. She obviously didn't have a problem with women dating women, so why would she restrict herself to only dating men if she was still attracted to women too?

"Then why…" Jane blurted out, before she realized what she was doing. She felt herself blush even deeper. "I'm sorry. It's none of my business."

"Why don't I date women anymore?" Maura asked quietly.

Unable to think of anything else to say, Jane simply nodded.

The medical examiner smiled reassuringly. "It's ok Jane. It's a fair question. The answer is that I date men because it's easier to date men."

Jane frowned. The meaning behind Maura's "explanation" was completely lost on her. '_Easier to date men'? What the hell is that even supposed to mean?_" On the one hand, Jane supposed that Maura could mean that it was easier to be "straight" than deal with the issues of being perceived as gay, a fact that Jane was more than willing to accept as having at least some truth behind it. Somehow, though, the detective didn't think that that was it. Maura wasn't the kind of person to let fears over what others would think about her dictate who she dated. She had to mean something else by her statement, but for the life of her, Jane couldn't begin to imagine what that might be.

For a few moments, Jane considered simply asking Maura to explain what she had meant. Since she was still just barely getting comfortable with discussing the topic in the first place, though, she decided to simply let the issue go for now. Instead, she would fall back onto what she did best: make a joke, and use humor to avoid directly talking about the situation.

Jane reached out and took the last bite of sandwich off Maura's plate. "So you're saying that you date men because they're in your comfort zone?" Jane asked, a slight grin on her face, as she popped the sandwich into her mouth.

Maura grinned back, acknowledging that Jane had trapped her with her own words. "I guess I do."

Jane's left eyebrow arched high on her forehead. "Strange. I thought we were supposed to be doing things to get us out of our comfort zones."

Maura nodded in agreement. "That was the plan."

"Hmmm," Jane exhaled thoughtfully. "So maybe you should rethink your 'dating only men' philosophy."

Maura laughed lightly and nodded her head. "Maybe I should."


	4. Martin Luther King Jr Day

**January 19 - Martin Luther King Jr. Day**

Maura queued up a selection of classical music and then hit play. She nodded in satisfaction when she heard the first few notes coming through her home sound system and then walked into her kitchen. She had managed to slip out a little early at the end of work in order to prepare for her dinner date that evening with Gerald. The extra time had allowed her to get everything ready for the meal she would be cooking with plenty of time to spare. All she had left to do was pick out a bottle of wine, and the last of the pre-dinner prep work would be complete.

The sound of a knock on the courtyard door followed by it opening caught her attention. "Maura?" Jane called out as she stepped inside the medical examiner's house. "You home?"

Unlike Maura, Jane had had the day off for Martin Luther King Jr. Day, so the blonde hadn't seen her friend since the detective had left her home after the football game the previous day. "Hey there," Maura said, a genuine smile of happiness lighting up her face. "I didn't expect to see you tonight."

"I know, but I had to run a couple errands and I figured while I was out I'd bring back the casserole dish Ma sent home with me yesterday." The detective leaned against the back of the couch. "What's going on?"

"Gerald's coming over tonight and I'm making dinner," Maura replied.

A chagrined expression appeared on Jane's face and she immediately stood back up. "Sorry, I didn't realize you had a date tonight. I'll go."

Maura waved her hand dismissively and then began to untie her apron. "Don't be silly. Gerald won't be here for another half hour and it won't be time to actually start cooking for a while yet. I was just making certain I had everything ready to go."

"But you need to finish getting ready for your date," Jane protested.

Maura folded her apron and placed it on the top of the kitchen island. She looked down at the dress she was wearing and then back up at her friend. "Actually I am ready, unless you see something that looks wrong?" she asked, turning in a slow circle.

As she came back around to face the other woman, Maura saw the brunette staring at her with eyes that were slightly glazed over. Unable to resist the urge to tease her friend, Maura moved to rest her forearms on the kitchen island and then leaned forward. She was fully aware of exactly what the position was doing for her cleavage, and it took every ounce of self-control she possessed not to grin when she saw Jane's eyes drop down and linger for far longer than any amount of decorum would allow. "So, do you see anything wrong?" Maura asked, deliberately pitching her tone into a more suggestive register.

Jane blinked and slowly raised her gaze to meet Maura's. "No, you look amazing," she said, a noticeable strain in her voice.

Maura straightened up. "So there's no reason for you to go, is there?"

Jane shook her head to clear it and then shrugged, a move Maura suspected was intended to convince them both that the detective had been unaffected by Maura's actions. "Alright if you're sure, I can stay a little longer."

"I'm sure," Maura replied, as she walked over to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water. "Between dinner with everyone and the football game afterwards, we barely had two minutes to talk yesterday," she pointed out, handing Jane the bottle. "I never even had a chance to ask how your date went Saturday night."

"It was fine," Jane replied noncommittally, before taking a drink of water and moving to sit down on one of the chairs at the kitchen island.

Maura pursed her lips slightly. She was actually quite certain that Jane's date had gone much better than simply "fine," but she decided not to push things just yet. "Did you enjoy your day off?" the medical examiner asked instead.

"It was fine," the detective said again. "I actually spent most of it cleaning my apartment." Jane perused the various ingredients that were neatly organized on the countertop. "What are you making?"

Maura bit her lip to hide a smile. It wasn't like Jane to be curious about food unless it involved bacon or something equally bad for her health, and she never showed any interest in what Maura was preparing for other people. The only reason the medical examiner could think of for Jane's sudden interest in culinary matters was that she was trying to change the subject, and there was only one reason she could think of that Jane would want to do that. Electing to bide her time for a little longer, Maura answered the question. "Moroccan chicken with a fruit and olive topping, served with couscous."

The detective nodded thoughtfully, as she continued to study the food. Finally she looked up at her friend. "So _not_ fried bologna sandwiches?"

"I don't want to set the bar too high the first time I cook dinner for Gerald," Maura said dryly. "What would I possibly do for an encore after a meal like that?"

"Oh I think we both know what Gerald would want as an encore, and I can't imagine he'd be disappointed by anything you did," Jane said with a smart-ass little grin.

Maura's eyebrow's shot upwards in surprise at the other woman's frank comment. _'Alright, Detective. If you want to play, let's play.'_ "I was actually referring to cooking for him a second time. However, I'm sure you're right. He wouldn't have any complaints, especially if tonight went as well for him as your Saturday night did for you," she smirked.

Jane nearly choked on the water she was drinking. Coughing and sputtering, she held up her hand when Maura tried to approach, indicating that she would be fine but needed a few moments. "What?" she finally managed to rasp out.

Maura's lips twitched in amusement. "Your date with Erin Saturday night. It obviously ended in a satisfying sexual encounter for you."

The detective coughed a few more times and then cleared her throat. "How could you know that?"

The medical examiner laughed lightly as she sat down beside her friend. "It was fairly obvious," Maura said somewhat smugly. "After all, you were practically glowing yesterday and you were in a ridiculously good mood all day long."

Jane scowled. "So what? You're saying I couldn't just be happy because I was spending time with my friends and family watching football?"

"Your mother spent the day telling you that you needed to get a haircut and complaining that you still don't know how to cook properly," Maura observed pointedly. "You only got one cannoli because Sergeant Korsak and Frankie each had four. And to top it all off, you lost your bet _to me_ on the over/under for the Seattle/Green Bay game, a bet you were gloating about winning with just five minutes left in the game. Yet despite all of that, you were grinning like a Cheshire cat from the time you first walked through the door at noon, until you finally left after the Patriots game." Maura leaned back in her chair, a confident expression on her face. "Something obviously made you very happy, so give me another reason for that dazzling, indefatigable grin you had on yesterday, and I'll admit that I'm wrong about Saturday night. But remember, the Patriots game didn't begin until after 6:30, so you can't pretend that the reason you were in such a good mood all day was because they defeated the Colts."

Jane took a small drink of water and then placed the bottle down on the island. "They didn't 'defeat' the Colts, they _destroyed_ them. That was an ass-kicking for the ages."

"Whatever, and you're deflecting," Maura said calmly. "Admit that I'm right, or give me another reason. It's your choice."

Jane let loose a breath that was half frustration, half disbelief. "Ok, ok. I'll admit you're right about how my date ended Saturday, but for the record, that was only _part _of the reason I was in a good mood yesterday."

Maura's brow knit slightly as she tilted her head to the side. "What was the other reason?"

"I'm not telling you," the detective replied, setting her jaw stubbornly.

"Why not?"

"You told me to either admit you were right, or give you another reason. I'm admitting you were right, which means I don't have to give you another reason."

It took Maura a few moments to puzzle through what the other woman had said. "But you want to make sure I know that I'm not completely right about why you were in a good mood?"

"Correct."

Maura crossed her arms and looked at her friend skeptically. "Or alternatively, there is no other reason, and you're just making that up because you don't like to lose and you want to drive me insane."

"That is also _entirely_ possible," Jane admitted with a smirk.

Maura counted to five before replying. "You're really annoying sometimes."

"I know!" the detective agreed, grinning gleefully.

Maura decided to ignore the other woman's juvenile behavior. "So how about providing some details about your date," she said, without a hint of guile.

The detective snorted. "The only 'detail' you're getting is that Erin was definitely more than 'merely competent.'"

Maura's eyes widened slightly in surprise, impressed by the relative boldness of Jane's statement. After all, even if she wasn't actually telling Maura anything specific, she was still clearly admitting that she had enjoyed her night with Erin, which was more than the medical examiner could ever remember Jane saying about any previous romantic encounter. "Fine. Maybe you'll be in more of a mood to share details after your date tonight."

"Ok, how the hell do you know I have a date tonight?" Jane demanded.

Maura laughed at her friend's consternation. "I know you, Jane. You're wearing a brand new shirt–"

"Just because I'm wearing a new shirt doesn't mean–"

"AND you spent your day off from work cleaning your apartment," Maura continued, as if Jane hadn't tried to interrupt. "You're either really worried about something, or you're getting ready for a date that you expect to end in your apartment." Maura looked her friend over speculatively. "You don't seem to be worried about anything," she pointed out evenly.

Jane groaned in defeat. "Alright, _Detective_ Isles, you got me again," she said, holding up her hands in mock surrender. "Erin and I are going to see a late movie, and afterwards I'm planning on asking her to go back to my place."

Maura looked at her friend thoughtfully. In the past, Jane would frequently become completely flustered and would rarely provide any information at all about her dates, no matter how hard Maura tried to elicit information from her. Now, though, the detective was not only openly confirming that her relationship with Erin had progressed to include a sexual component, the brunette was even relaxed enough about that fact to joke about it as well. The realization that Jane seemed more at ease talking about such matters caused decidedly mixed feelings within the medical examiner.

On the one hand, she was happy to see that Jane was finally managing to take the first steps towards moving past the idea that sex was something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. Maura had always found that attitude to be extremely unhealthy, and she was glad that Jane seemed more at ease and able to enjoy a sexual relationship with another person. On the other hand, she wasn't entirely thrilled that it was some relative stranger who had so quickly managed to bring about this change in her friend. Rationally, Maura had known as soon as Jane had told her that she was dating women that at some point, the detective was bound to meet a special woman who would turn out to be what Jane had been looking for all along. Maura just hadn't expected it to happen so quickly, or to bother her quite so much. The medical examiner couldn't help but wonder if there was something special about this new woman in Jane's life to have prompted the changes she was starting to see. The idea rankled her more than it should have.

Maura's phone chirped, indicating an incoming message and interrupting her train of thought. She rose from her chair and walked over to retrieve her phone from her purse. She frowned when she scanned the text.

"Problem?" Jane asked.

Maura shook her head absently as she typed out her response. "Just a message from Susie about some test results I was waiting on. Unfortunately they don't tell us anything useful. So," Maura asked, as she placed her phone down on the desk. "What did you and Erin do on your date Saturday?"

Seeing the disbelieving look on the other woman's face, the medical examiner let out a short laugh. "I meant _before _you had sex…or was it just sex?" she asked, teasingly. She didn't really think Jane would give her any explicit details, but at the same time, she couldn't help but wonder just how far she could push things. Mostly, though, Maura really wanted to learn more about this new woman in Jane's life and the dynamic that existed between her and Jane.

"Honestly, I wasn't even sure that's how the night would end up," Jane admitted. "We had dinner and then went dancing, and things just sort of…progressed," the brunette responded with a slight blush.

Once again, Maura was struck by the difference in her friend. Jane's usual reluctance to discuss intimate activities was certainly still present, of course, but beyond that slight bashfulness, Maura could also see something else. The detective seemed infinitely more comfortable in her own skin, and her hesitance to relate any specific details regarding her date seemed more a result of modesty rather than actual embarrassment, as it had so often seemed in the past.

And once again, Maura found herself fighting off feelings of annoyance that this woman whom Jane hadn't even known for more than a month or so was having such a dramatic influence on her friend.

The medical examiner deliberately expunged the negative thoughts from her mind. "Ahhh, dancing," Maura said, forcing a smile onto her face. "'The vertical expression of a horizontal desire legalized by music.'"

Jane shook her head, a dazed expression on her face. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Maura laughed. "It's a quote from George Bernard Shaw. It just means that dancing is a societal approved mechanism of indicating sexual interest in another person."

Jane rolled her eyes. "You mean it lets you tell someone you think they're hot," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Yes, '_Giovanni_,' that's exactly what I'm saying," Maura replied, her eyes twinkling with humor. "Dancing is a common precursor to sexual activities. As a matter of fact, it was Gerald's skills on the dance floor that attracted me to him in the first place."

"Gerald's _dance_ skills?" Jane asked skeptically.

"That's right."

"Maura, you were _waltzing_."

"Actually we mainly danced the foxtrot, but yes, we waltzed too."

Jane shook her head dismissively. "Ballroom dancing is not sexy."

"Of course it is."

"Really? You're saying that ballroom dancing gets you hot and bothered?"

Maura pursed her lips. "Come here," she said, gesturing for the other woman to approach.

"Why?"

Maura tapped her foot impatiently. "Jane, please, just come here."

The detective hesitated and then walked over to stand in front of the blonde. "Alright, what?"

"I'm going to show you that ballroom dancing is sexier than you think," Maura said, reaching out for Jane's left hand.

The brunette immediately jerked her hand away and took a step back. "I'm not waltzing."

Maura sighed in exasperation and moved forward. "I'm not asking you to. We don't need to actually dance for me to demonstrate what I'm talking about." The medical examiner held out her hand expectantly. When Jane began to shake her head again in refusal, the blonde allowed a small grin to tug at her lips. "Afraid you'll see I'm right?" she asked, knowing exactly which buttons to push to get the detective to give in.

Jane grimaced and then reluctantly placed her hand in Maura's. "No actual dancing."

"No actual dancing," Maura agreed with mock solemnity, as she placed Jane's left hand on her right shoulder. Maura then took the detective's right hand in her left, palms touching, before finally resting her right hand lightly on the small of Jane's back. The blonde positioned herself so that she was just slightly to Jane's right with only a few inches of space between them.

"Stand up straight, and look into my eyes," Maura instructed quietly, as she drew Jane closer to her.

Jane wavered for a moment and then did as she was told. Maura began to speak, but found herself at a loss for words, as the truth of her situation suddenly hit her. She was holding the best friend she had ever had in her arms. They were standing so close that Maura could feel the heat from the detective's body, and with every breath she took, she was drawing Jane's unique, fragrant scent deep into her lungs. With a flash of insight, Maura realized that her complicated, confusing feelings about Erin weren't so complicated or confusing at all. She was jealous, just not for the reason most people would be under these circumstances.

Maura had known for years that she was attracted to Jane. In truth, it would have been harder to believe that she wasn't attracted to the brunette than that she was. The homicide detective was powerful, gorgeous, caring, and smart, and Maura knew that there was nothing Jane wouldn't do for her if she were to simply ask. But the medical examiner had accepted long ago that she would never be able to have anything other than a platonic relationship with Jane, and even now, holding the brunette in her arms, knowing that the detective was attracted to women, that belief remained unchanged. For Jane, dating was a means to an ends, a way of assessing a potential partner to determine if she wanted to make a long term commitment that would ultimately result in marriage. Maura, however, preferred to keep things casual. For her, dating _was_ the "ends," and she had no interest in becoming involved in any kind of traditional, deep romantic relationship. The two of them wanted completely different things from the people that they dated, and they would be doomed from the start if they were to ever try to cross the line from friends to lovers.

Maura wasn't jealous of Erin because she was Jane's lover. Maura was jealous because Erin posed the potential to become everything that Maura was for Jane in addition to being her lover.

The medical examiner had long known that Jane could never be as emotionally close to a man as she was to a woman. The detective had spent her entire life competing with the boys, and that was never going to change. Jane would always approach any relationship with a man with a certain combative attitude, never willing to entirely let down her guard where her deepest emotions were concerned, and always holding part of herself in reserve. So no matter what other feelings Maura might have had about Jane's relationship with Casey, the one thing she had always taken comfort in was that there was a part of Jane's heart that Casey would never be able to reach, a part that belonged to her. And even though there were times when Maura felt ashamed that she received so much pleasure and relief from this fact, in the end, she didn't care. Maura knew that there would never in her life be another person as important to her as Jane. Knowing that Jane needed her, that Casey would never be able to completely replace her, had made it possible for her to deal with Jane's relationship with the army colonel.

But now Jane was dating women, and there was no longer anything that would hold the detective back from creating a bond with one of these women as deep as anything that Maura and Jane shared. Erin could be the person Jane was looking for to create a new life with, and if not Erin, then one of the women who would certainly come after her while Jane tried to find a permanent romantic partner. Even if she and Jane remained as close as they were now, an outcome Maura knew full well was highly unlikely considering how much less time they would inevitably spend together, their friendship would be fundamentally changed. So many of the things they did now, up to and including the "fake waltzing" they were currently engaged in in her living room, were, at best, weird for two people to do who were supposed to be 'just friends.' It would be out of the question for them to behave in such a familiar manner if Jane were seriously involved with another woman, just as it would be inappropriate for them to continue the teasing and flirting they engaged in on a daily basis.

Suddenly realizing that they had been standing in silence for far too long, Maura cleared her throat. "So," she said. "Holding your partner's hand…looking into the other person's eyes, all the while moving your body in perfect time with each other while you're pressed tightly together." She drew Jane in the remaining distance to her body to emphasize her point and then moved her hips against the other woman's in the semblance of a dance. "You really don't see the appeal of this?" she asked, her voice unconsciously taking on a deeper tone.

Jane swallowed hard as her hips instinctively followed the blonde's. "I guess I never really thought about it being like this."

"Maybe you should," the medical examiner replied. Maura knew that she should end the demonstration. After all, she had made her point and she was just torturing herself by prolonging things any further. Despite those facts, though, she found herself tightening her hold on the other woman and beginning to sway back and forth slowly in time with the music that filled the room. There was going to come a day when this kind of thing would no longer be "allowed," when the personal feelings of someone else would need to be considered whenever Maura wanted some "Jane time." Right now, though, there was no one else to worry about, and Maura wanted to enjoy these moments while she still had the chance.

"I like the new shirt," Maura said softly, after several seconds had passed. "Did you go shopping today?"

"No, I got it Saturday afternoon," Jane replied.

Maura arched an eyebrow in surprise as her hand lightly stroked up and down over Jane's lower back. "You went shopping Saturday afternoon?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Why didn't you ask me to go with you? I told you Friday night I didn't have anything planned for Saturday."

A look of discomfort flashed across Jane's features. A moment later, she released her hold on Maura's hand and stepped back from the medical examiner, ending their "dance." "I didn't want to bother you."

Maura found herself missing the feeling of Jane's body pressed against her own more than she would have thought, and she chided herself for her foolishness. She wasn't losing Jane anytime soon. She didn't need to act as if this was the last time they'd ever be alone together. Drawing in a deep breath, Maura slowly let it out again in an effort to regain her sense of equilibrium. "When has shopping ever been a bother to me?" she asked, confused by the other woman's response.

Jane returned to the kitchen island to retrieve her bottle of water and took a long drink. "Honestly, I wasn't comfortable asking you to help me shop for a shirt to wear on a date with another woman, especially when I…" The detective's voice trailed off uncertainly, as a flush began to appear on her face.

It only took a moment for Maura to realize what the issue had to be. "Wanted to have sex with her?"

Jane sat down and then looked directly at her friend. "_Intended_ to have sex with her."

The words were uttered quietly, but at the same time, there was a sort of calm "certainty" about the way that Jane said them that momentarily gave Maura pause. She was unaccustomed to hearing Jane speak in such an unselfconscious manner with respect to "sexual" issues. Maura thought about the woman Jane was currently seeing, and she found herself wondering just what kind of woman she must be to have inspired such confidence in her friend so quickly and easily.

Pushing aside the thought that Jane might already have actual feelings for Erin, Maura focused on the more immediately pressing issue. Jane was creating distance between them because she was worried how Maura would feel about the detective dating other women. She couldn't afford to let that attitude gain a foothold in their relationship right from the start. "Jane, I've helped you pick out clothing to wear on dates with men. You shouldn't be uncomfortable with me doing the same thing just because you're now dating women."

Jane frowned skeptically. "You don't really believe that, do you?"

"Why shouldn't I?"

"Because things are different now."

"No they aren't." Maura protested.

"Yes, they are," Jane countered. "And the longer we ignore the elephant in the room, the worse it will be."

"'Elephant in the room?'"

"It's an expression…it…it means there's an obvious issue that everyone is aware of but is ignoring."

"And what 'elephant' do you think is in this room?"

Jane sighed heavily. "For as long as I can remember, we've had this kind of harmless 'flirty' thing going on between us, and that was fine before we knew we both liked women, but now?" Jane shook her head slowly. "I'm not sure where the line is anymore between what's ok and what's not ok for us to do as friends, and I don't want to do anything that might end up hurting you."

A long silence filled the room, while the two women simply stared at each other. Maura could see the confusion and worry on the detective's face, and she realized with a sense of relief that Jane was as concerned as she was about making certain that their friendship remained as strong as ever. She could also see something else.

"You're attracted to me," Maura said, the words a statement, not a question. Part of her was thrilled at the idea; another part of her knew that that it changed nothing other than to offer the potential to complicate their friendship.

"Of course I'm attracted to you," Jane replied, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "You're beautiful, intelligent, and kind, and you're always there to support me when I need you. I'd have to be a complete idiot to be attracted to women and _not _be attracted to you." Jane took a deep breath before continuing. "And I'm pretty sure if I asked, you'd tell me that you're attracted to me too."

Maura hesitated, not because she intended to lie, since that would of course be pointless anyway, but because she wanted to decide the best way to respond. "You're right, I am," she finally agreed. "But just because I find you attractive, it doesn't mean that I'll feel compelled to act on that attraction. After all, I find Tommy attractive and I've never felt any serious temptation to pursue him."

The instant the words were out of her mouth, Maura saw Jane's lips flatten into a hard, uncompromising line and she knew that she had said exactly the wrong thing to try to reassure her friend. _'So much for thinking things through first,'_ she berated herself. "Jane, I'm sorry, I didn't mean–"

The detective rose from her chair. "It's getting late," she said in a tense, clipped voice. "I should be going."

Maura quickly moved forward and placed a hand on Jane's arm to stop her. "No, you're the one who started this. If you want to talk about one elephant, we might as well talk about the whole herd." Maura waited until the other woman gave her a brief, stiff nod, indicating her willingness to hear the medical examiner out. "Jane, Tommy and I are both adults–"

"Exactly," Jane muttered under her breath, deliberately avoiding Maura's gaze.

"And we both know how you feel about the two of us being together. There is zero chance of anything ever happening between Tommy and me, Jane. Not now, not ever."

Jane exhaled heavily, slightly mollified but clearly still not happy. "You say that, but you don't know my brother. He can be extremely charming when he puts his mind to it."

Maura smiled gently. "Trust me, Jane, for the sake of our friendship, I am quite capable of resisting a charming Rizzoli, no matter how incredibly funny, sexy, and beautiful, he, _or she_, may be."

For several moments, Jane simply stared at her friend, trying to decide what to say. Eventually, she cleared her throat and reached out to take Maura's hand. "You're the most important person in my life," she said softly, her voice filled with emotion.

Maura squeezed Jane's hand reassuringly. "And you're the most important person in mine."

Jane sighed. "But us together as a couple…it'd be a terrible idea, right?"

Maura nodded as a feeling that was equal parts relief and disappointment filled her. "It would never work, but there's no reason this needs to affect our friendship. Everything we've done up until now as friends…dinners, movies, spa days, shopping…"

"Coffee in the morning, calling you in the middle of the night when I can't sleep…"

"Staying over at each other's places when it's too late to go home?"

"All of that," Jane agreed. "We keep doing all of that, right?"

"Absolutely," Maura replied. The medical examiner paused for a moment to carefully consider her next words. "But if at some point you become involved with someone who's bothered by how close we are and you need to take a step back–"

"Then I'll stop being involved with that person," the detective replied with calm finality.

"Jane…you don't have to make that kind of promise to me."

"It's not a promise," Jane said. "Just a simple statement of fact. I don't spend time with you because I don't have anyone else to spend time with. I spend time with you because that's what makes me happy." The detective used her free hand to gently cup the blonde's cheek. "You're irreplaceable, Maura," Jane said softly. "Anyone who wants to be a part of my life will have to accept that my relationship with you is non-negotiable. Ok?"

Maura swallowed to get past the sudden tightness in her throat. "Ok." She knew that what Jane was saying was almost certainly a fantasy, but Maura didn't care. For once in her life, she was going to choose to believe in the fantasy for as long as she could.

Jane exhaled softly and then glanced at the clock on Maura's wall. "I really should go," she said, taking a step back from her friend. "Gerald might get here early and I wouldn't want to intrude."

"Alright," Maura agreed reluctantly. She watched the brunette walk towards the door to the courtyard.

As she began to step outside, the detective paused and looked back at her friend. "Maura?"

"Yes?"

Jane lowered her eyes to focus on the hand resting on Maura's doorknob. "You're the other reason."

Maura frowned and shook her head. "I'm sorry, the other reason for what?" she asked, completely confused by the other woman's non sequitur.

The detective shifted uneasily back and forth on her feet. "You're the other reason I was so happy yesterday." Jane lifted her gaze to meet her friend's. "Ever since Friday night…it's like this huge weight is off my shoulders, and I just feel really good right now." The detective cleared her throat awkwardly. "Thanks for making this ok."

For a moment, Maura simply stared at her friend in amazement, as the sudden realization that she had been reading things wrong hit her squarely between the eyes. The change in Jane's attitude wasn't due to her relationship with Erin; it was because of the support that Maura had given her when Jane had come out to her. For the first time in ages, Jane was comfortable and at ease with who she was and what she wanted, and it had been Maura's acceptance of who she was that had allowed the Jane to feel like this.

"You never need to hide anything from me, Jane," Maura said quietly. "You can always tell me anything."

The detective's head dipped slightly in acknowledgement. "Yeah well, I also appreciate you not pushing for more details about Saturday night. I know you think it's a positive thing to talk about stuff like that, but that's just not me."

"I know, and I won't push," Maura promised. "I do, however, reserve the right to on occasion tease, wheedle, inveigle, and cajole to gain information."

"I'll accept teasing and wheedling but no 'bageling' or 'caroling.'"

"Deal," Maura agreed with a smile.

Jane straightened up slightly and began to continue out into the courtyard, but then stopped again. "Oh…there's just one more thing you should know."

"What's that?" Maura asked.

"Despite what you may think, you would _not_ be able to resist the full force of Rizzoli charm if it was used against you."

Maura laughed. "You think so?"

Jane slowly allowed her gaze to travel down Maura's body and then back up again. When her eyes met Maura's, the medical examiner's breath caught in her throat at the smoldering desire she could see in Jane's gaze. For several seconds, the two women simply stared at each other silent and unmoving, until one corner of the detective's mouth tipped upwards in a lazy, sensual smile.

"I _know_ so," Jane said softly, before walking out the door and shutting it behind her.


	5. Groundhog Day

**AN: So yeah, back.**

**Apologies are in order to anyone who is actually still looking for this, but there's not really any way I can truly apologize for how long I've been gone. I will just offer the explanation that I managed to get myself going down a really, REALLY bad rabbit hole, and I was so far inside my own head that I could never figure out just why what I was doing wasn't working at all for the story (not good to get trapped in your own head BTW, leads to paralyzing self-doubt and without a good road map, it's really hard to get out of there on your own). **

**Unfortunately, literally months went by writing stuff that simply didn't fit what I wanted to do with this story, and by the time I figured out the problem with what I was writing, there was no easy way back to where I needed to be. But this story was one I really wanted to do, so I'm taking another shot. To make sure I don't lose my way again, I spent the last few months "roughing out" all the chapters. Now that I have my road map, I'm back in my own comfort zone and ready to go.  
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**To those who are still interested in reading, well thanks for the second shot. I promise to do better this time around.  
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><p><strong>February 2 - Groundhog Day<br>**

As the movie's credits began to roll, Jane turned off Maura's big screen TV and placed the remote down on the coffee table. For a few moments, the two women continued to sit together on the couch in silence, before Maura moved from her position resting against the detective's side. Jane watched her friend stand up and slowly stretch, and then pick up her empty wine glass and Jane's empty beer bottle from the coffee table.

"Well now I understand why people say 'it's Groundhog Day' when situations seem to repeat over and over again," Maura said as she walked into the kitchen.

Unable to help herself, Jane allowed her gaze to roam freely over the other woman while Maura walked away. The medical examiner was wearing a loose sweatshirt and a pair of yoga pants that, in theory, were modest and ordinary. In reality, the sweatshirt tended to gape open, exposing a smooth shoulder that begged to be caressed, while the pants hugged the blonde's curves in all the right places and accented her toned ass perfectly.

Forcing herself to look away, Jane silently berated herself for ogling the other woman. Maura was her friend, and thinking about her like that was definitely crossing over the "friendship line." Even just considering the possibility of changing their relationship from friends to lovers was asking for trouble.

Closing her eyes, Jane tried to focus on something other than how much part of her wanted to 'ask for trouble.' Unfortunately, she was almost immediately provided with a distraction that had been plaguing her all evening: the stiffness and soreness in her hands. The detective grimaced as she clenched and unclenched her fists a few times, trying to loosen things up, but she knew that her efforts were largely futile. The tightness had been building up for hours, and she knew that it was going to take a lot more than just some simple stretches to ease the dull, nearly constant pain that was radiating through her hands.

"Jane?"

With a sudden start, the detective turned to see that Maura was looking at her expectantly, and she realized that the other woman must have asked her a question. "Sorry, what?"

Maura's brow creased into a brief frown. "I asked if you wanted to take the leftover pizza home with you."

"Just the pepperoni. You can keep the veggie slices for breakfast tomorrow."

A look of distaste appeared on Maura's face. "You're not really going to eat pizza for breakfast, are you?"

"That's the plan."

"Jane, breakfast is quite possibly the most important meal of the day. You should eat something healthy, not something filled with grease and cholesterol."

"Fine, I'll take the veggie ones too. Better?"

"Oh yes," Maura said dryly. "That's so much better." With a sigh, the medical examiner began searching for a container. "I don't know why I agreed to pizza tonight," she said, as she continued to look through her cabinets. "You must have had your fill of it yesterday while you were watching the game."

"Actually, we didn't have pizza."

"Really? You usually order pizza when you are watching football."

Jane watched Maura pull out a container and begin filling it with the leftover slices. "Didn't need it, what with the nachos, chips, wings, party subs, mini pigs in blankets–"

"'Pigs in blankets'?" Maura interrupted.

"Yeah, you take cocktail wieners and wrap them in canned crescent dough…"

"Stop! There is no possible way you can finish that sentence that I'm going to feel good about," Maura said. The medical examiner sighed in exasperation. "How can you eat like that?"

Seeing the reproving look she was getting from the other woman, the detective held her hands up defensively. "Hey, don't blame me. It's your fault I ate all those things."

Maura gaped at her friend. "My fault? And just how did you come to that conclusion?"

Jane put on her most innocent face. "I was a victim of peer pressure and I didn't have anyone there to set a good example for me. I invited you to come over to watch the game with us but you turned me down."

Maura shrugged dismissively. "Gerald doesn't care for football and I don't understand it enough to dislike it."

The mention of Maura's current romantic interest caused a flash of resentment and irritation to flare up within the detective. She knew it was ridiculous to feel that way. After all, Maura could hardly be blamed for preferring to spend her evening on a date rather than watching a football game she cared nothing about with Jane and their friends. And it wasn't as if Maura had been neglecting her in any way since she had begun dating Gerald. They still had dinners together; they still watched movies together; they still occasionally ended up spending the night at each other's homes.

But just because Jane knew that logically she had no right, or even reason, to be jealous, it didn't mean that she was happy about the situation. Admittedly, she had only met Gerald once, but as far as she was concerned, once was more than enough. The man had been far too arrogant, too glib, and too shallow for her tastes, and she'd had the distinct impression that he'd been talking down to her the entire time they'd been speaking. Gerald just didn't seem right for someone as amazing as Maura, and there was something about the medical examiner's relationship with him that just felt off to her somehow. As a result, the detective couldn't help but feel annoyed every time Gerald's name was brought up.

"One more thing wrong with him," Jane muttered under her breath, "He doesn't like football."

"'One _more_ thing?'" Maura asked. "Is there something else wrong with Gerald I don't know about?"

Jane closed her eyes briefly and cursed her friend's ridiculously good hearing. She quickly ran through her options, trying to come up with a good way to respond to Maura's question, but all she could think of was that under no circumstance was she going to tell her friend that she thought her boyfriend was a superficial, condescending prick.

Realizing that several seconds had passed and Maura was waiting expectantly for her to say something, Jane blurted out the only thing she could think of. "Just what you said before. That he's bad in bed." '_Seriously?_' she berated herself. '_You went with sex_?'

"Oh," Maura replied, somewhat nonplussed. "Well to be fair, I never said that he was 'bad' in bed. I said that he was 'merely competent' and 'lacked imagination.' As it turns out, though, what he lacks in imagination, he makes up for in a willingness to 'take direction,'" Maura said with a saucy grin.

A spike of heat caught Jane low in her gut, as the image of Maura taking charge in the bedroom and giving "directions" to her lover filled her head. It was exactly what she did not need to be thinking about right now, but she knew she had no one to blame but herself for her friend's response. She had opened the door to discussing Gerald's sexual performance, and Maura being Maura had walked right through.

Blushing like she was a thirteen year old girl, Jane got up and walked over to the DVD player to retrieve the movie, hoping that Maura would attribute her reaction to Jane's well-known reluctance to discuss intimate matters, rather than her inappropriate thoughts of Maura engaged in erotic activities with a lover. She removed the DVD from the player and returned the disc to its case. As she clicked the case shut, though, a stabbing pain in her right hand caused her to inhale sharply and drop the case to the ground. She reached down quickly to retrieve the DVD, hoping that Maura hadn't noticed anything strange. When she turned and saw the medical examiner watching her closely, however, Jane knew that she had been found out.

"Your hands have been bothering you all night, haven't they?" Maura asked quietly.

Jane opened her mouth to deny Maura's statement, but a single arched eyebrow immediately told her not to try. "A little," she admitted with a shrug. She had been doing her best not to let on just how much her hands were hurting, but as usual, Maura had seen right through her attempts to act as if everything was fine. "The damn cold makes them ache." She returned to her previous spot on the couch and tossed the DVD onto the coffee table next to the remote. She flexed her fingers awkwardly and shook her hands. "I don't blame Bill Murray for wanting to kill the stupid groundhog. When I heard on the news we were getting six more weeks of winter, I felt like taking a shot at him myself."

"Punxsutawney Phil doesn't cause the weather, Jane. He merely predicts it."

The detective turned to look at her friend, a sarcastic comment on her lips. When Maura's actual words registered with her, however, she froze. "What?"

Maura placed the container with the pizza on the kitchen island and then picked up a towel to wipe off her hands. "The groundhog doesn't cause the extra weeks of winter," Maura explained patiently. "He makes a good faith prediction based on whether or not he sees his shadow. You can't blame him for that."

For several seconds, Jane simply stared at her friend in dumbfounded silence, uncertain how to respond to Maura's seemingly sincere assertion that the groundhog should not be held responsible for the fact that they were in for more winter. When she saw Maura fighting back a smile, though, the detective's lips quirked upwards. "How often is he right?" she asked, knowing with absolute certainty that Maura would have the answer.

"Punxsutawney Phil correctly predicts the weather approximately 39% of the time," Maura replied without hesitation.

Jane leaned back against the couch. "So there's a 60% chance we're _not_ going to get six more weeks of winter."

Maura frowned and shook her head. "That's not the way it works."

"I need some hope, so it's the way it works for me tonight," Jane replied, flexing her fingers uncomfortably.

Maura looked around the kitchen, assuring herself that everything had been taken care of for the evening. "Would you like another beer?"

Jane briefly considered the offer and then shook her head. It was getting late and she would be leaving soon. "No, but I'd take some water."

Maura retrieved a pitcher from her fridge and poured two glasses of water, and then walked back into the living room to sit beside her friend. She placed both glasses on coasters on the coffee table, and then took Jane's left hand in her own. "You should have said something."

Jane tried to pull away from the other woman's grasp, but gave in when the medical examiner tightened her hold. "You don't have to do that," she protested half-heartedly.

"I'm not doing it because I 'have to,'" Maura replied quietly, as she carefully opened Jane's fist and pressed her thumbs firmly into the brunette's palm.

Years of experience had taught Maura exactly how to best relieve the detective's pain, and she wasted no time in putting that knowledge to work. Jane sighed in contentment in response to the other woman's efforts. She knew that she could have asked Maura to do this for her at any point that evening, and her friend would have done so gladly and without hesitation. Despite the fact that she knew Maura was capable of working wonders on her aching hands, though, she had remained quiet. After all, asking for help would have meant that she would have had to actually acknowledge the problem in the first place.

The minutes passed by in silence while Maura continued to work to relieve the pain and stiffness in Jane's hands. Eventually, the blonde glanced up at her friend "Better?"

"Yeah," Jane admitted.

"Maybe next time you could skip the 'suffering in stoic silence' part and just tell me that your hands hurt," Maura said softly, as she released Jane's left hand and reached for her right.

"Maybe," Jane replied. She knew as well as Maura did that she probably wouldn't say anything the next time either. Admitting pain was admitting weakness, and 'weak' was the one thing she couldn't bear for others to see her as. "So what did you think of the movie?" she asked, deliberately changing the subject.

Maura's head tilted slightly to the side as she considered the question. "Well, it was certainly more appropriate that watching _Die Hard _on New Year's Day."

"Very funny," Jane said in a deadpan voice, earning a small grin from her friend. She watched quietly for several seconds while Maura continued the massage, before speaking up again. "Why is Groundhog Day even a holiday? Seems pretty weird for people to decide that a giant rat can predict the weather."

A faint smile played about Maura's lips. "You do know that groundhogs and rats are not the same thing, don't you? They're both rodents, but groundhogs are in the family Sciuridae, which includes squirrels and chipmunks, while rats are in the family Muridae with mice and gerbils."

Jane sighed and rolled her eyes, feigning annoyance. Truthfully, though, a part of her loved it when Maura began casually relating obscure information the way that other people talked about TV, movies, or other staples of pop culture. "Fine. Why did people decide to make a holiday out of a giant _rodent _predicting the weather?"

Maura shrugged. "Like many of our modern holidays, Groundhog Day actually has its origins in an early pagan holiday, in this case, Imbolc."

"Imbolc?"

"That's right. It was the holy day of Brigid, the Goddess of fire, healing and fertility. Imbolc was one of the centerpieces of the Celtic calendar…a midwinter festival halfway between the winter solstice and the spring equinox. Imbolc was a festival of light, so the celebrations focused on lighting fires.

"And yanking rats out of the ground?" Jane asked, the beginnings of a smile tipping the corners of her mouth.

Maura's brows arched upward slightly. "No, _groundhogs_ weren't a part of the celebration." Maura paused for a moment to reach for her glass and take a drink of water. "When the Roman Catholic Church converted Ireland to Christianity, they co-opted Brigid and made her a saint, and took over Imbolc and renamed it 'Candlemas.'"

Maura placed her glass back on the coffee table and then resumed the massage. "Candlemas commemorates the ritual purification of Mary, 40 days after the birth of Jesus. It was the day that all of the Church's candles for the year were blessed, and people would place lighted candles in their windows at night. Many people believed that Candlemas predicted the weather for the rest of winter. In England, the saying goes '_If Candlemas be fair and bright, winter will have another fight. If Candelmas brings cloud and rain. Winter won't come again_.'"

Jane's brow furrowed slightly in thought. "OK, I see the connection with 'six more weeks of winter,' but how does that get us to people hauling a rat out of the ground and talking to it?"

The blonde's mouth curved indulgently at her friend's continued, deliberate, use of the word 'rat.' "For centuries, people in the part of Europe that's now Germany believed that badgers had the power to predict the coming of spring. When German immigrants settled in Pennsylvania, they took that tradition with them, but since there is a distinct lack of badgers in Pennsylvania, they had to find another prognosticating animal to take its place."

Jane nodded, finally seeing the link. "And they looked around and decided, 'Hey, that fat rat over there looks like it would be as good as a badger at predicting the weather.'"

"Something like that," Maura agreed.

Jane watched Maura complete the massage by gently stroking each of her fingers. As the blonde finished, Jane caught the medical examiner's hands in her own. "Thank you," she said sincerely.

"You're welcome," Maura replied.

"So," Jane said, exhaling softly as she released Maura's hands. "Other than it being an appropriate choice for the occasion, what did you think about the movie?"

Maura paused for a moment to consider the question, and then slowly nodded her head. "I liked it."

"Really? Not just tolerated but actually liked?" Jane asked.

"That surprises you?"

"A little," Jane admitted.

"Why?"

"Because it's a movie based on the idea of something that's scientifically impossible. Doesn't that pretty much make the entire thing one big plot hole to you?"

Maura's laugh rippled through the air. She sat back facing the detective, one elbow leaning on the top of couch so that her head could rest against her hand. "The story wasn't based on science. It was based on magic."

"Since when do you believe in magic?" Jane scoffed.

Maura shrugged at the question. "I don't need to believe in magic to enjoy a movie based on the idea. As long as the film clearly establishes that it's not based in reality as we know it, then I have no problem with it containing mystical or transcendent elements. Besides, there's nothing wrong with a little fantasy now and then."

"Huh…I never would've guessed you'd be interested in fantasies."

A sly smirk stole over Maura's features. "Well, it all depends on the fantasy," she said with a wink.

Jane felt her pulse skitter slightly in response to the suggestive expression on Maura's face, and once again she found her brain racing to places it shouldn't go. She knew Maura was just teasing her. After all, the two of them had engaged in this type of harmless, friendly flirtation for years, and they had agreed that they were not going to allow the fact that they were both attracted to women, or that they were admittedly both attracted to each other, to affect their friendship. They had promised to still do all the same things that they had always done, and in theory at least, that included flirting.

The problem, though, was that Maura had no intention or even interest in following up on anything when she flirted with Jane. The blonde had stated quite definitively that she no longer dated women, and even though Jane had no idea why Maura had made that decision, she didn't doubt the truth of her friend's statement. Jane, on the other hand, did date women, and there were times when she found herself wondering what would happen if the two of them pursued their flirtatious behavior beyond the stage of harmless teasing. Maura was a brilliant, beautiful, passionate woman, and Jane knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that dating Maura would be amazing _for as long as it lasted._

And that of course was the problem.

The two of them could never work as a couple, because any sort of romantic or sexual relationship between them would be doomed from the start. Maura was looking for commitment and marriage, and Jane was absolutely not looking for either of those two things. A relationship where one person wanted commitment and the other just wanted to have a good time was a sure recipe for disaster. Jane had no intention of risking her friendship with Maura merely for the sake of a fling.

"Are you ready to tell me what I have to do this month for our challenge?" Maura asked, interrupting the brunette's mental ramblings.

Jane began to reply, but then hesitated. She had agreed to this 'resolution" of sorts only because she had thought it would be easy to convince Maura to give up on the idea. She had been absolutely certain that the no-nonsense, health-conscious Dr. Isles would balk at wasting her time learning the pointless skill of pen spinning and eating a fried bologna sandwich, but Maura had done both with barely a complaint. Jane had to admit that she'd seriously underestimated Maura's commitment to this resolution, which left her with one of two choices: she could behave like a brat and continue to come up with disgusting things for Maura to eat and stupid things for Maura to learn, or she could accept her friend's challenge like the mature adult she was always trying to convince her mother that she was.

"Well I've got it down to a couple of things," Jane replied. '_She's your best friend. Make her happy. Be an adult_.'

Maura picked up her water and took a sip. "You know, I was talking to Gerald about our resolution last night at dinner and he thought it was an excellent idea. He even thought he might like to participate–

"I want you to learn to how to do a wolf whistle," Jane said in a clipped tone.

"A 'wolf whistle'?" Maura asked, her forehead creasing into a frown.

"Yeah, you know, with your fingers," Jane replied tightly, demonstrating what she meant by placing the middle and index fingers of her left hand against her lips. There was no fucking way that she was going to take part in something where she was playing third wheel to Maura and Gerald and their little coupledom. "You've seen guys whistle at women before, haven't you?"

"I have," Maura said. "But why do you want me to learn how to whistle at women?"

"Don't be so narrow-minded. You could use it to whistle at men. I bet Gerald would love to hear you whistle at him," Jane said flippantly.

Maura slowly and deliberately placed her glass down on a coaster, and then looked at Jane intently. "So let me see if I understand you correctly. Out of all the things you could possibly ask me to learn to improve myself, you chose 'whistle at someone like a drunken frat boy'?"

Jane glanced down at her hands…the hands that Maura had just been massaging. God, she felt like an ass, but she was in too deep now. Her pride was smarting over the idea of Maura replacing her with Gerald, even if she was replacing her in something that Jane didn't even want to be involved with in the first place. A tiny voice whispered in her brain that she was being irrational, that she was wildly overreacting, but she ignored it and continued to push through. "You act like that's not a valuable skill," she muttered.

Maura's jaw was set in a grim line. "Jane–"

"The idea was to learn something out of your comfort zone, right?" Jane asked, knowing that her only defense was offense. She had to use Maura's own words against her.

"Yes, but–"

"So doesn't this fall into that category?" she pressed.

Maura closed her eyes and raised her right hand to pinch the skin at the bridge of her nose. "Alright," she said after a few seconds, her hand dropping back down to her side as she turned to face her friend again. "And what food do I have to try?" she asked warily, clearly not expecting to like what she was about to hear.

Jane reached for her water and took a long drink, partly because she was thirsty, but mostly because it provided a way to avoid Maura's gaze. '_This will do it,'_ she thought to herself. '_There is no way in Hell Maura will ever eat this_. "Poutine."

The blonde frowned and shook her head slightly. "Poutine? What's poutine?"

"It's a Canadian thing," Jane replied. "French fries covered in brown gravy and cheese curds."

Maura's jaw dropped open and a faintly ill expression appeared on her face. "You can't be serious."

"Serious as a heart attack."

"Which is what I'll likely have after eating that crime against good health," Maura shot back. "Jane, be reasonable. You're asking me to eat something loaded with fat, cholesterol, sodium, and empty calories. There's no redeeming value in something like that."

"Well I guess I came up with something else out of your comfort zone, didn't I?" Jane said heatedly. Seeing Maura about to protest further, Jane set her glass down and raised her hands in mock sympathy. "Look, if you don't want to try one of greatest things ever created, we can just call this resolution off now. It's up to you," she said, doing everything in her power not to sound like she was gloating, but unable to entirely avoid it. She was going to end this stupid thing right here, right now, and then she wouldn't have to put up with this bullshit any longer. Maura could trade resolutions with Gerald and leave Jane the hell out of it.

Maura lowered her head, and for several seconds, appeared to be considering whether or not she should call off the resolution. Clearly frustrated, the blonde breathed in deeply through her nose a few times, her jaw clenched tightly. Finally, Maura looked up to meet Jane's gaze. "Winter squash and kelp soup," she said evenly, her features perfectly composed.

Having fully expected to hear Maura agree to end everything, Jane was momentarily thrown by the other woman's words. "What?" she finally managed to ask.

"Winter squash and kelp soup," Maura repeated, a glint of steel in her eyes. "I have a new recipe I've been dying to try out. I think now is the perfect time."

It took a few moments for Jane to process the other woman's response, but once she had, she seized on one word out of all the rest. "KELP? KELP? That's seaweed, Maura," she said, her voice dripping with disgust. "That's the nasty _slimy_ crap that gets wrapped around your legs when you go swimming in the ocean. I'm not eating that!"

"It's a highly nutritious _vegetable_," Maura said coolly. Lifting her chin, she met the other woman's gaze straight on. "You agreed to eat vegetables, so if you're refusing to eat it, then _you_ are the one who forfeits and you'll admit that _you lose_."

Jane's eyes narrowed at the challenge she heard in Maura's voice. The medical examiner had essentially picked up the gauntlet that Jane had thrown down and smacked her across the face with it. Now it was up to the detective to show that she could handle anything that Maura could think to throw at her.

"Fine," Jane muttered, as she got up from the couch and began stalking away to give herself some much needed space. "I'll eat seaweed soup." There was no way that she was going to let Maura claim victory by default. Besides, the odds were still in her favor. Sophisticated Maura Isles had to eat gravy cheese fries and learn to whistle like a construction worker. That was easily worth choking down a few spoonfuls of some disgusting soup.

Reaching the kitchen island, the detective leaned back against it and crossed her arms. "So what do I have to learn?" she asked, not bothering to try to hide her disdain for the entire ridiculous affair. "Algebra?"

"Maybe next month. This month I want you to learn how to dance the foxtrot."

Jane had been prepared for a lot of different things, but "foxtrot" was definitely not one of them. "I…you…what?" she finally asked, completely thrown by her friend's response.

"I want you to learn how to dance the foxtrot," Maura repeated.

The detective simply stared at her friend with a confused look on her face. Eventually, she cleared her throat awkwardly. "I don't ballroom dance."

"Well I guess I came up with something out of _your_ comfort zone then, didn't I?" Maura asked with saccharine sweetness.

A tumble of confused thoughts and feelings assailed the detective. The memory of holding Maura in her arms while her friend had demonstrated the basics of the foxtrot was seared into her brain. As much as she had enjoyed that moment, though, she had no particular interest in learning how to foxtrot, or for that matter, learning any other ballroom step. The women that Jane went out with weren't "ballroom dancing" women. There was only one woman the detective could ever imagine herself dancing the foxtrot with, and that woman already had a dance partner.

"Why do you want me to learn to foxtrot?" Jane asked, stalling for time. She knew she wasn't going to be able to refuse if Maura insisted, but maybe if she knew the reason why the blonde had chosen this for her, she could come up with a good enough argument to convince her to pick something else.

"Why do you want me to learn to whistle?" Maura countered.

Jane frowned. "You think it's the same reason?"

Maura chuckled humorlessly. "Oh I'm absolutely certain it's not."

Jane considered Maura's statement, trying to figure out why Maura would want her to learn a stupid dance like the foxtrot. Unfortunately, she couldn't come up with a single plausible reason, and she knew that Maura wasn't going to explain unless Jane confessed the reason for asking Maura to learn how to do a wolf whistle. Since there was no possible way that she was going to admit that she had basically behaved like a giant ass because she didn't like Maura's boyfriend, the two of them were, for all intents and purposes, at an impasse.

"Fine," Jane huffed out, "I'll learn to dance." She was annoyed and frustrated, but the worst part was that she felt guilty about making Maura learn to whistle and eat poutine, and she didn't know why she should. The only reason she had gone along with this stupid resolution was because Maura had manipulated her into agreeing to participate. If anyone should feel guilty here, it was Maura, not her.

Maura sighed and then slowly stood up. As Jane watched, the medical examiner picked up both of their glasses from the coffee table and then walked past Jane into the kitchen. The detective could hear the other woman moving around behind her, placing the glasses in the sink, before finally moving to the other side of the island.

Several more seconds passed in silence.

"You were surprised that I liked the movie," Maura finally said. "Do you want to know why I liked it?"

Jane fought a brief war with herself as she debated not responding, before finally giving in. "Why?" she asked, still facing away from her friend.

"I liked what it was about," Maura replied. "Trying new things and becoming a better, more rounded, happier person…just like our deal to try new things each month."

Jane slowly turned around to face the other woman. "_That's_ what our deal is about?" she asked, sarcasm dripping from her voice. "Because I thought it was about tormenting your best friend into eating crappy foods she doesn't want to eat, and making her learn stupid things she doesn't want to learn."

A rueful smile slowly appeared on Maura's lips. "I wondered how long it was going to take you to admit that was your plan," she said softly.

Jane went still as she suddenly realized two things. First, she had just confessed to Maura that she was deliberating choosing things for the medical examiner to eat and learn that she knew would annoy her in order to try to sabotage the deal they had made.

Second, Maura was already well aware of that fact.

Uncertain what to say, Jane shifted uncomfortably and looked away. A hot wave of guilt even more powerful than before washed over her, and once again, she railed at the feeling. Damnit, she had nothing to apologize for. Maura was the one who had…who had…

Who had what, exactly? Just what was she blaming Maura for here? The fact that she had convinced Jane to do something she didn't want to do? Because if that was the case, then Jane had no one to blame but herself. Maura hadn't forced her to do anything. She could have said no. Instead, she had gone along with the other woman's request to make her friend happy, and then had proceeded to do everything in her power to make Maura miserable about it.

As she continued to think everything through, though, Jane realized that the answer wasn't quite that simple. She had been prepared to give in and choose things that Maura might actually enjoy, but as soon as the blonde brought up Gerald, Jane had acted like a petulant child. She hated the fact that her friend was spending time with Gerald…that he was filling a role in Maura's life that she was unable to fill. It didn't matter to her that that role involved doing things that Jane either didn't want to do or couldn't allow herself to do.

It also didn't matter to her that she was currently dating someone as well. After all, her relationship with Erin could never be anything more than casual and temporary. Maura's relationship with Gerald, on the other hand, had the potential to become something serious and long-lasting. Gerald posed the threat to someday take Maura away from her, and hearing Maura make even a casual comment regarding the idea that Gerald might become a part of _their_ resolution had been enough to make her see red.

Jane exhaled softly. She needed to get past this. She was acting selfish and possessive, and it wasn't fair to Maura. The blonde was free to spend her time with anyone that she wanted, and Jane being a bitch about it wasn't doing either of them any favors. As much as Jane might want to believe that her feelings of guilt were undeserved, she knew that she was the one who was in the wrong here. "I'm sorry," she said sincerely, relieved that she actually meant it.

Maura hesitated for a moment, and then stepped forward and leaned back against the kitchen island beside her friend. "I'm sorry too. I pushed you into doing something I knew you didn't want to do. I should have known you'd push back."

"Uh huh…and by 'push back' do you mean you should've known that I'd be a completely obnoxious jerk about it?" Jane asked, her voice tinged with self-recrimination.

"I wouldn't say that you were _completely_ obnoxious about it."

Jane's left eyebrow arched high on her forehead. "I notice you didn't object to the part where I said I was a jerk."

"Yes," Maura agreed, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "I noticed that too."

Jane grinned at the other woman and leaned in to bump shoulders with her. "I really am sorry."

Maura looked down for a few moments, gathering her thoughts, and then lifted her head to look at the other woman. "Jane, I didn't ask you to do this because I think I know better than you do what's best for you."

Jane nodded. "But you do think that," she said with a smile.

"Only sometimes," Maura said, grinning back at her friend for a moment, before her expression turned serious again. "But honestly, I asked you to do this with me because I thought it would be a good idea for us both to shake things up. But if you really don't want to keep doing this, we can stop after this month."

"_After_ this month?"

"That's right," Maura replied, a teasing note creeping into her voice. "Which means you won't have to learn algebra, but you _will_ have to dance at the wedding."

The wedding.

A college classmate of Maura's was marrying her girlfriend in March, and the medical examiner had asked Jane to accompany her to the wedding. Jane had nearly forgotten all about it, or more accurately, she hadn't forgotten about it as much as she had simply assumed that at some point, Maura would tell her that she intended to go with Gerald instead of the detective. After all, she had asked Jane to go with her back before she had even met Gerald. It was only logical that she would prefer to attend the wedding with the man she was dating rather than with Jane.

"I'll learn how to dance, Maura," Jane said. She wasn't thrilled with the idea, but considering what a pain in the ass she had just been, the last thing she was going to try to do was wiggle out of anything now. "But do you really still want me to go to the wedding with you?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't I?" Maura asked, a puzzled frown on her face.

Jane shrugged, thinking the answer fairly obvious. Gerald was an intelligent, handsome, cultured gentleman whom, according to Maura, was a fantastic dancer to boot. He would be the perfect companion to accompany Maura to the wedding of a wealthy socialite. "Wouldn't you rather go with Gerald?"

"No, I'd rather go with you."

"Why?" Jane asked, genuinely confused by her friend's choice.

Maura's brows drew downward as she studied the detective in silence. "Jane, if you don't want to go to the wedding with me, just say so. I'm not going to force you to go if you really don't want to."

Jane quickly held up her hands and shook her head. "No, no...I'm not saying that at all. It's just...wouldn't it make more sense for you to go with Gerald?"

"No, it wouldn't," Maura said.

"How can you say that?" Jane asked. "He's good-looking and smart…he probably has impeccable manners and I'm sure he knows all the right things to say to important rich people. Throw in his incredible dancing skills and you have the perfect partner. I'm...you know…"

Maura shook her head. "No, I don't know. You're what?"

Biting her lip, Jane looked away. "I'm none of that, Maura," she said quietly, finally giving voice to all the fear and frustration she held inside. She was none of the things Maura needed in a long-term partner, and someday, Maura was going to find someone who was. And as much as the two of them tried to pretend otherwise, Jane knew that when that day finally came, their relationship would be irrevocably changed as a result.

Maura reached out to take Jane by the hand. "Look at me," she instructed.

Jane resisted the other woman's request for several moments, before sighing quietly and turning to face her friend.

"Why do you doubt yourself?" Maura asked. "You are brilliant…funny… thoughtful…absolutely gorgeous," she said softly, as a smile appeared on her lips. "You are an accomplished detective, a devoted sister and daughter." Maura tightened her grip on Jane's hand. "And you are the best friend that anyone could possibly hope to have. I would be _honored_ to have you accompany me to the wedding."

Jane shuffled her feet and shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah, well, you won't be so 'honored' when I trip over you on the dance floor," she warned gruffly

"That's what the lessons are for," Maura pointed out, squeezing Jane's hand gently.

Realizing that nothing she said was going to change her friend's mind, the detective exhaled heavily and nodded her head. "Alright," Jane said at last, "But I still don't understand why you wouldn't rather go with Gerald. I mean you are dating the guy."

Maura grimaced slightly and released Jane's hand. "Attending a wedding with someone you are dating tends to imply certain levels of commitment and intimacy to the relationship that are beyond the currently established parameters of my relationship with Gerald. It would be inappropriate for me to ask him to accompany me to the wedding."

Jane closed her eyes and briefly covered her face with her hands, before slowly pushing her fingers back through her hair until she was clenching her fists at the back of her skull. She exhaled heavily and then cracked open one eye to look at her friend. "So you're saying you're not sure you're serious enough about him to take him as your date to a wedding?"

Maura blushed and nodded slightly. "That is a reasonably accurate assessment, yes"

Jane shook her head as she dropped her hands to her side. "God, sometimes…" Suddenly her eyes widened as a thought occurred to her. "So wait…I'm supposed to learn the foxtrot so that I can dance it with _you_?"

Maura's brow furrowed slightly. "Is that a problem?"

"No, of course not," Jane replied out loud. '_God yes!_" she said to herself as she struggled to not only block the memory of what it had felt like to hold Maura in her arms when they had just been pretending to dance, but to also resist the temptation to imagine what it would feel like when they were dancing for real. "But if I'm going to be dancing with you, then I need to learn to lead."

"Why?"

"Because if we're dancing together, I should be leading,"

"Why?" Maura asked again.

For a moment Jane just stared at her friend in disbelief. The answer seemed so ridiculously obvious that she couldn't understand how Maura didn't see it. "Because I'm…" she began, and then paused when she saw the challenging expression on Maura's face.

Maura's left eyebrow arched slightly. "Taller?"

Jane sighed in exasperation. "Come on. Maura, if you saw two women like us dancing together, you'd naturally assume that I would be the one leading."

"No, I wouldn't because that would be guessing," Seeing the detective about to protest, Maura hurriedly continued. "Jane, I learned to foxtrot while attending an all-girls boarding school. I'm perfectly capable of leading or following, so for once in your life, make things easier on yourself and learn to follow."

"Fine," Jane said, holding her hands up in defeat. "You can lead, but no dipping."

"No dipping," Maura agreed solemnly. She paused for a moment before speaking again. "So everything is settled? No other problems with going to the wedding with me?"

"None that I can think of," Jane replied.

"What about Erin?"

"What about her?" Jane asked, honestly confused by her friend's question.

"Is it going to bother her if you go to the wedding with me?" Maura asked. "I don't want to cause any problems between the two of you."

"Oh…oh, no, it won't be a problem," Jane said. Truthfully, the issue had never even occurred to her. Erin wouldn't care about Jane going to a wedding with someone else any more than Jane would care if Erin did the same. They weren't a couple, and they both knew that their relationship was nothing more than a casual fling that would end once it had run its course.

Jane glanced at her watch. "It's getting late. I really should go."

Maura looked at her watch and then frowned. "You could just stay here tonight."

"Can't," Jane said, as she walked over to the entryway and grabbed her coat. "I need to get home for Jo. My dog walker is out of town for a couple of days."

"Alright, but drive carefully. The roads still aren't completely cleaned up from all the snow we've had the last few days.

"I'll be careful," Jane promised as she buttoned up her coat. She pulled her gloves out of her pocket, and then paused as a thought struck her. "You know, if this was Groundhog Day, tomorrow would be today."

Maura shook her head in confusion. "What?"

Realizing how ridiculous she had just sounded, Jane felt herself flush with embarrassment. "I mean, if this was the movie, tomorrow would be today again."

"Oh," Maura replied, clearly not following the brunette's line of thinking. "Yes I suppose it would."

Jane shuffled her feet uncomfortably. "Tomorrow I wouldn't ask you to whistle and eat poutine."

Maura's eyes suddenly widened in understanding. She nodded and smiled at her friend. "Ok."

"So maybe I should come up with something else and I can tell you tomorrow–"

Maura shook her head and waved her hand dismissively. "It's fine, Jane. You don't need to come up with anything else for me."

"But–"

"Really, it's fine," Maura said with a reassuring smile. "It's no big deal. We're ending after this month anyway, right?"

"Right," Jane agreed. Realizing she wasn't going to change her friend's mind, she tugged on her gloves and then draped her scarf loosely around her neck. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight," Maura replied. "Text me when you get home so I know you made it there safely."

"Ok, Ma," Jane said with a grin. She turned and took a step towards the front door. "Meet me for coffee in the café before work tomorrow?" she called over her shoulder.

"Of course," Maura agreed.

Just as Jane reached for the door handle, she heard a piercing whistle coming from behind her. Quickly turning around, she looked over to where Maura was standing at the kitchen island. Her jaw dropped open when she saw the blonde smirking at her, container of pizza in one hand, the thumb and middle finger of her other hand poised at her lips.

"Don't forget your breakfast," Maura said.

Half in a daze, Jane slowly walked towards her friend. "How…how did you do that?"

The medical examiner shrugged. "I learned when I was in Africa with Doctors Without Borders."

Jane shook her head admiringly. "You know, every time I think I have you figured out, you manage to surprise me."

Maura cocked her head to the side and smiled. "I think that's a good thing."

"Yeah," Jane agreed, "So do I." She took the container of pizza from her friend. "Not that I object since I was willing to change it anyway, but how could you accept whistling as your challenge for the month if you already know how to do it?"

"I learned how to whistle to quickly get someone's attention, but I never learned how to perform the particular cadence used to express 'interest' in another person. _Technically_, I will be learning a new skill."

Jane grinned, accepting the fact that she had been outsmarted. "Well played, Dr. Isles."

"Thank you, Detective Rizzoli," Maura replied, bowing her head slightly. She stepped forward and wrapped Jane's scarf securely around her neck and then tucked the ends into the collar of her coat to secure it in place. She lightly ran her hands across the brunette's shoulders and then down her arms. "Drive safe, Jane," she said softly. "And I'll see you tomorrow."

There was nothing remotely suggestive or untoward about the blonde's actions, but Jane could still feel her pulse race in response to Maura's gentle touch. "Ok," she said with a small nod, not trusting herself to say anything else.

Jane stepped outside Maura's house and shut the door behind her. The cold wind howled around her, threatening to chill her to the bone. But as the detective began walking towards her car, one thought above all others dominated her mind and sent liquid heat coursing through her, warming her from the inside out…

God help her, but she would never be able to resist the full force of Isles charm if it was used against her.

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><p><strong>AN: For the record, I am not Canadian, but I have to say that poutine is amazing<strong>.


	6. Valentine's Day

**AN:First, thanks to everyone for their awesome reviews/feedback after the last chapter. I honestly expected that after posting after such a long absence, ******I'd get a lot of comments (maybe the majority) that woul**d run along the lines of "screw you if you think we're going to read your story after all this time." It was quite a pleasant surprise to be wrong about that. I know I didn't get a chance to personally respond to everyone who posted a review, but believe me, I read every one, and they definitely are fueling the need to keep going with this thing now that I've gotten my focus back.  
><strong>

**Second, thanks to whoever nominated this story for a Rizzles fanfic award (and me f******or "best new author")**. I definitely wasn't expecting it, and I'm really quite honored to have been nominated. **

**And third, this was always a chapter that I went round and round on, with at least four completely different ways it could have gone. As I lack a beta/editor, I was forced to harass non-Rizzoli and Isles viewing friends to get their advice. ******Here's hoping the path I picked was the right one, or at the very least, a good one. **:)**

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><p><strong>February 14 - Valentine's Day<strong>

Jane cursed under her breath as she stepped out her mother's front door and saw the first few snowflakes fluttering down from the sky. She was tired of snow. She was tired of ice. She was tired of the constant gray skies, the biting winds, and the bone chilling cold day after day after day. This winter was stretching on forever, and there was no end in sight.

The detective checked to make certain that her mother's door was locked and then looked down at the small, shivering dog she was holding in her arms. "Alright, Jo, ready to go home?"

Receiving a small yip in response, Jane grinned. A recent drug bust had shed new evidence on an old homicide cold case, and Jane had put in lots of extra hours the last several days working with a detective from Vice in an effort to determine if their suspect was responsible for the deaths of three college kids two years before. Her mother had volunteered to look after Jo so that the pup wouldn't be alone in Jane's apartment all day, and while that had certainly been better for Jo, Jane had definitely missed being greeted by her four-legged friend when she got home each night. So as soon as she was able to wrap things up for the day, she had driven over to her mother's to pick up Jo and take her home.

"Actually I can't complain too much about this storm, can I?" Jane asked, as she began walking out of Maura's courtyard towards her car. "Ma went to the store because she's worried about not being able to get out the rest of the weekend, which means that I didn't have to hear the Valentine's Day version about how I need to find a guy and settle down and get married. I guess maybe I should just be grate– FUCK!" she yelled, as her feet slipped out from under her and she went crashing to the ground.

For several long seconds, Jane sat on the cold, hard stones of Maura's courtyard, her left arm cradling Jo protectively against her chest. Cautiously, she stretched out her legs, flexed her shoulders, and rolled her head around. After assuring herself that nothing was broken or required immediate medical attention, she turned her attention to Jo. "You ok?" she asked, looking the pup over anxiously.

After receiving a quick kiss on the nose as reassurance from Jo that she was, in fact, perfectly fine, Jane carefully set her down on the ground. "God fucking damnit," she growled, as she felt the pain of the impact start to radiate through her body. She might not have suffered any serious injuries, but she was going to be sore as hell tomorrow. It was official; winter sucked, and she hated every fucking thing about it.

Hearing the sound of a door opening, Jane looked up to see Maura looking out into the courtyard. The medical examiner gasped when she saw Jane sitting on the ground. "Jane? Oh my god, are you alright?"

The detective held up her hand when Maura began moving quickly towards her. "Slow down or you'll slip too. And yes, I'm fine," she grumbled, her voice a mixture of annoyance and embarrassment.

Jane began to roll onto her hands and knees to make it easier to stand, but was stopped when Maura crouched down beside her and pushed her back down. "Take it easy," she instructed as she began to look Jane over. "Did you hit your head? Did you twist anything?" she asked worriedly.

Over the blonde's continued protests, Jane moved into a crouching position and then slowly stood up, wincing slightly as she did so. "I'm alright. I just fell on my ass. I don't need to be checked out by a doctor," she said irritably.

Jo was circling around the two women, whining quietly, so Maura picked up the little dog. "Alright, fine, if I promise not to check out your ass, will you at least come inside and let me take care of the rest of you?" Maura asked.

The detective's gaze narrowed slightly as she glared at her friend. Maura's face was the picture of innocence, but there was an unmistakable gleam in her eyes. The blonde knew exactly what she had said, and she had chosen her words deliberately.

"Yeah, like you could keep that promise," Jane scoffed. She wasn't usually the one who initiated the flirting between them, but she'd be damned if she'd back down once Maura started it.

Maura smirked at the detective and shrugged. "Probably not," she agreed unapologetically, "But come in anyway and let me make sure you're alright."

Jane cast a quick glance at Maura's front door, before looking back at her friend. "What about Gerald?" she asked flatly. When she had talked to her mother that morning about coming over to pick up Jo, Angela had mentioned that Maura had plans to cook Valentine's Day dinner for Gerald. The last thing Jane was interested in was dealing with that smug jerk, especially knowing what he and Maura would undoubtedly be doing later on that night after dinner was through.

"He isn't here," Maura replied. Her brow suddenly furrowed in concern when she saw Jane clenching and unclenching her fist. "You're hurt," she said, as she reached out to capture Jane's hand in her own.

Jane shook her head and fought back the urge to curse. "I mashed my fist into the pavement when I fell," she explained, showing Maura her scraped knuckles. "It's no big deal."

Maura exhaled heavily in frustration. "Just come inside," she said, her words now more of a command than a request. She placed her free hand on Jane's elbow and tried to guide the detective towards the front door. When Jane refused to budge, though, Maura released her hold and began walking away. "Fine, don't come in, but allow me to point out, I have your dog," she called over her shoulder, as she disappeared into her house.

For several seconds, Jane considered just walking away and letting Maura dog-sit for the night. Unfortunately, she knew that succumbing to that level of stubbornness would just be punishing herself. Cursing quietly under her breath, the detective reluctantly gave in and walked into Maura's house and shut the door behind her.

Almost immediately, the brunette was met by a delicious aroma that caused her stomach to rumble in response. Trying not to think about the fact that Maura was making something that smelled that wonderful for an asshole like Gerald, Jane looked around for her dog. After a few moments, she caught sight of Jo lying on the bed Maura had purchased for her. "Don't get too comfortable," Jane warned. "We're not staying."

Jo simply huffed out a sigh and burrowed further into her bed.

"Jane?"

Turning towards the kitchen, the detective saw Maura waiting patiently for her at the sink, a box of first aid supplies on the counter beside her. Sighing in resignation, Jane walked over to join her friend. "It's just scraped knuckles," she said, showing Maura her hand again. "Pretty sure I'm going to live."

"It may be a minor injury, but you should still give it the proper attention if you don't want it to turn into something worse," Maura replied evenly. Turning on the faucet, the medical examiner stuck her hand under the running water to gauge the temperature. Once she was satisfied, she nodded for Jane to place her hand under the water. "I'm sorry about the ice. I thought I threw down enough salt but I must have missed a spot."

"Don't worry about it. It's impossible to keep anything cleared this winter." The detective watched as the blonde opened up her first aid kit to reveal an impressive array of supplies. "Jesus, Maura. You've got enough stuff in there to open a hospital. What are you preparing for, Armageddon?"

A faint smile tugged at Maura's lips, as she pulled out a piece of soap and a small cloth. "I used to keep a standard issue first aid kit in the house, but since my best friend is constantly finding new and creative ways to injure herself, I've had to move up to a custom model with several additional features."

Not having a good comeback, Jane watched in silence while Maura wet the cloth and applied the soap to it, before taking the detective's hand and gently cleaning the abrasion. After a few moments, a thought struck her. Maura wasn't wearing her normal 'date attire' of a designer dress and fancy high heels. She had been able to move relatively quickly to where Jane was lying on the ground because she was wearing slacks and, for Maura anyway, sensible shoes. Granted, she still looked as stunningly beautiful as ever in her gray silk blouse and tailored pants, but her clothing was a far cry from what Jane would have expected her to be wearing for a date, even if the date was in her own home.

Before Jane could pursue that line of thought any further, Maura was turning off the water and lightly patting the detective's hand dry. She examined Jane's knuckles for a few moments, and then reached into her first aid kit and grabbed a small can. With practiced ease, the blonde removed the cap with one hand while she drew Jane's injured hand towards her with the other. The detective, however, quickly pulled out of Maura's grasp and took a step away from her friend. "No spray stuff."

Maura looked at the can and then back at her friend, a puzzled expression on her face. "This prevents infections," she explained, not understanding the other woman's reaction.

"I don't care what it does. It stings. I don't want it."

"It…'stings'?" Maura asked slowly.

"Yeah, it stings," Jane said brusquely. "I remember every time we got hurt when we were kids, Ma sprayed that stuff all over us and it hurt even worse than the reason she was spraying it on us. I hate that crap."

"But it kills bacteria and prevents infections," Maura said in her most reasonable tone. "You need it."

"I'll take my chances."

"Jane–"

"Uh uh. No way. Not happening," the detective said emphatically.

Maura's left eyebrow arched skeptically. "Ok, just so I'm clear here…you, Jane Rizzoli, the person who is always trying to deny when she is hurt or in pain, you are saying that this little can of antiseptic is too much for you to handle?"

"Well…when you put it like that…still no."

Maura drew in a deep breath and then let it out again. "Alright, I didn't see the need for it since technically, you are an adult, but I do know of a medical technique that will stop the stinging."

"Really?" Jane asked suspiciously.

"Yes, really," Maura said.

Jane stared intently at the other woman's neck, trying to detect any evidence of hives. After several seconds had passed and Maura's skin remained blemish-free, she nodded grudgingly. "Ok," she said, stepping forward and extending her hand to her friend. "Go ahead."

Maura flexed the fingers of her left hand for a few seconds to loosen them, and then grasped Jane's wrist. She spent a few moments carefully adjusting her grip until her fingers were positioned correctly. Taking a deep breath, she lightly pressed the tips of her fingers into Jane's skin, and then looked up at her friend. "Ready?"

Jane gritted her teeth. "Yeah."

Maura sprayed the contents of the can on the detective's hand, causing the brunette to breathe in sharply. Before Jane could react any further, the blonde leaned forward and lightly blew on the detective's knuckles. After several seconds had passed, Maura grinned up at her friend and inhaled deeply, and then lowered her gaze as she again blew cool air across Jane's skin.

Too stunned to react, Jane watched in rapt silence while Maura repeated the process two more times, her brain nearly short circuiting when the tip of Maura's tongue darted out to wet her lips. Finally, the medical examiner straightened up and looked at her friend. "How does that feel?"

Jane swallowed to get past the tightness in her throat. "Good," she managed to get out after a few seconds had passed. She lowered her head, ostensibly to examine her injury, but in reality, she needed a moment to collect herself. As much as she might try to deny it, a part of her always liked it whenever Maura took care of her. What she was experiencing right now, though, went far beyond the comforting feeling of knowing that someone cared about her. All she could think about were other ways that Maura could use her mouth to make her feel better, and the detective needed to put a stop to those prurient thoughts before they had a chance to make themselves known in the most awkward way possible. It was one thing to flirt with Maura as a joke. It was another thing entirely to suggest that they lock the doors, take off their clothes, and see what happened next.

"Did you learn that technique in medical school?" Jane finally joked weakly, desperate to move the conversation to safer ground.

"Actually, no," Maura said. She placed the cap back on the can and returned it to the first aid kit. "I learned it from my mother."

"Really?" Jane tried to imagine elegant, refined Constance Isles taking care of a scraped elbow or skinned knee, but failed miserably. "I can't picture that," she confessed.

"She had her moments," Maura said with a smile, as she began rinsing out the cloth she had used to clean Jane's hand. "Didn't Angela do the same for you?"

The detective shrugged. "Most of the time she was patching up Frankie, Tommy, and me all at the same time. There weren't a lot of opportunities to gently blow on one kid's 'owie' when two other kids were screaming and bleeding all over the place."

Jane stepped away from the sink and began walking over to the kitchen island to find out what Maura was cooking for dinner. The aroma coming from the pot on the stove was strangely familiar to her, but she couldn't quite place what it was. When she caught sight of a huge bouquet of roses sitting on the medical examiner's dining table, though, a flash of irritation raced through her, causing her to forget about the food. Her annoyance grew when she saw a large box of chocolates and a bottle of wine sitting beside the roses, along with a small box that she could only assume contained jewelry. "Wow…Gerald doesn't miss a trick, does he?" she muttered flatly.

Maura shrugged and closed the first aid kit. "He is nothing if not thorough," she replied. "I suppose that's part of what makes him such an outstanding lawyer."

Jane crossed over to study Maura's gifts more closely. One dozen perfect, long stemmed red roses…a box of imported, French chocolates…a bottle of French wine that Gerald had probably discovered while on vacation in France. And the jewelry box. Glancing over at her friend, Jane placed her hand on the lid. "May I?"

"Of course."

Drawing in a deep breath, Jane opened up the box. Her jaw tightened slightly when she saw the bracelet inside. It could be worse, she supposed. Gerald could have given Maura a ring. Still, the bracelet was obviously expensive, which meant that things must be getting serious between the two of them.

Jane shut the box and placed it back down on the table. "Gerald has excellent taste," she said. In truth, she didn't particularly care for the bracelet. It was too showy, and it didn't seem like the kind of thing that Maura would wear. Still, she had promised herself that she would be supportive of her friend's relationship with Gerald, so she wasn't going to voice her real opinion about his gift.

"I suppose," Maura replied, as she moved to stand near the kitchen island. "I don't know what I'll ever wear it with though. What about you and Erin? Were flowers and chocolates exchanged? Perhaps someone even received a red teddy?" she continued with a suggestive smirk.

Jane rolled her eyes as she walked over to lean against the kitchen island facing Maura. "No flowers, no chocolates, no teddys, bear or otherwise were exchanged."

"How could you get your girlfriend nothing for Valentine's Day?"

"Seeing as how Erin isn't my 'girlfriend,' it was pretty easy to do," Jane quipped.

Maura's head tilted to the side as she studied her friend. "What do you mean she's not your girlfriend?"

"I mean she's not my girlfriend. We're not in a committed, exclusive relationship. We're just two people who sometimes spend time together."

"And spend much of that time having sex," Maura said pointedly.

Jane's eyebrows arched upwards. "Ok, just so _I'm_ clear here…you, Maura Isles, the person who is always trying to tell me about the many health benefits of sex, you are saying that a person should only have sex with someone they consider to be a 'boyfriend' or a 'girlfriend'?"

Maura grinned sheepishly, conceding her friend's point. "Well when you put it like that, no. But your relationship is headed in that direction, right?"

"No."

"No?"

"Erin's a _visiting_ professor from NYU. She'll be leaving Boston in May to go back to New York City. There's no long-term future for me with someone like that." Seeing that Maura was clearly thrown by her comments, Jane frowned slightly. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's 'wrong,' I'm just surprised that you would pursue a relationship that you know has no possibility of becoming something serious."

"You disapprove," Jane said, her words more a statement than a question.

Maura's eyes widened noticeably. "No, of course not," she hurriedly assured her friend. "I simply didn't realize that that type of relationship interested you. But, uhm…"

Jane looked at her friend curiously. Maura was rarely at a loss for words, but it was obvious that she was uncertain how to ask what she wanted to ask. "But what?"

"Does _Erin_ know that you don't see anything serious happening between the two of you?"

Jane laughed and nodded her head. "Of course, which is why she decided to take advantage of the long weekend by flying to Ohio to visit her family earlier today. She won't be back in town until Wednesday night."

"Really? She flew to Ohio _today_?"

"Yeah, why?"

"It's just that she's lucky her flight actually made it out. They've been cancelling everything going out of and coming into Logan today because of the storm. Gerald's stuck in Chicago until Monday."

Jane's forehead creased into a frown. With the two of them working different cases this last week, their time together had been limited, and as a result, they hadn't had a lot of time to talk about personal matters. Still, it seemed a little strange that Maura hadn't mentioned that Gerald was out of town. "What's he doing in Chicago?"

"He's been there since Tuesday attending a conference. He was supposed to fly home late this morning, but his flight was cancelled. With the storm rolling in tonight, he wasn't able to get another flight until Monday morning."

"Well that su–, uhm, I mean, that's too bad," Jane sympathized, correcting her language before Maura had a chance to.

"It's fine," Maura said diffidently. "As soon as I heard the weather forecast, I knew there was a good chance he wouldn't make it back to Boston today."

"I guess that explains dinner then," Jane said with a small smile.

"Dinner?"

The detective's smile widened as she inhaled deeply, savoring the delicious aroma that filled the air. "You're cooking something Italian," Jane pointed out. "I know Gerald prefers French."

"Oh, well I've been hungry for Italian lately, and since Gerald's not around, I figured it was my chance to have what I wanted," Maura said with a coy smile.

A sly grin appeared on Jane's face. Unable to resist the temptation to tease Maura back, she slowly walked around the island until she was standing directly beside her friend. "You should have told me you were in the mood for something Italian," she said, her tone low and smooth. "I could have helped you out with that."

"Really?" Maura asked, leaning ever so slightly closer to the other woman. She allowed her fingers to lightly stroke up and down Jane's forearm, before looking up at her friend from beneath her lashes. "And how exactly could you have helped me?" she asked in a sultry voice.

Jane deliberately allowed her eyes to drop down to focus on the delectable cleavage that was so clearly available for her to view. After a few moments, she lifted her gaze to meet her friend's. "I could have called Giovanni for you," she replied, her lips twitching into a lazy smile.

Maura sighed dramatically and shook her head. "I'm afraid that wouldn't work. Giovanni isn't the _type_ of Italian I find myself craving at the moment."

Jane smirked and shrugged in feigned defeat. "Let me know if you change your mind," she said, as she stepped back away from her friend. "I'm sure he'd be happy to help you with any 'desires' you might have."

"I'll keep that in mind," Maura said dryly, her eyes twinkling with amusement.

"So…what are you making?" Jane asked, nodding towards the pot on Maura's stove.

"Italian sausage soup with tortellini...your mother taught me her recipe last weekend."

Jane's jaw dropped open slightly in astonishment. "You're taking cooking lessons from my mother?"

"I am," Maura confirmed. "I realized that even if you and I weren't going to continue our resolution, there was no reason why I couldn't come up with new things each month for me to learn. I've always wanted to learn how to prepare authentic Italian cuisine, so I asked your mother if she would be willing to teach me."

"Wow, you really are the daughter she always wanted. Pretty soon she'll be pressuring you to marry Gerald and start giving her grandchildren."

Maura laughed lightly and shook her head. "Oh I highly doubt that. Angela doesn't like Gerald any more than you do."

For a few moments, Jane simply stared at her friend in shock, too stunned by Maura's offhand comment to reply. Finally she cleared her throat awkwardly. "I uhm…I never said I didn't like Gerald."

Maura rolled her eyes at her friend. "You don't need to keep pretending that you like Gerald, Jane. It's not as if we're serious about each other anyway."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the fact that Gerald is no more my boyfriend than Erin is your girlfriend."

Jane gave her friend a dubious look. "Does _Gerald_ know that?"

Maura smiled wryly. "Yes, of course he does. Gerald is not romantically interested in me."

"Are you sure about that?" Jane asked, her voice still laced with doubt. "Because that does _not_ look like the work of a man who's just dating someone casually," she continued, as she gestured towards Gerald's gifts. "He must have dropped at least a grand on all of that stuff."

Maura shrugged carelessly. "Gerald didn't send those things to show his affection for me and win my heart. He did it because it's what's expected for a man in _his_ position to send to a woman in _my_ position on Valentine's Day."

"I don't understand," Jane said. "If he isn't interested in you 'romantically,' then why is he going out with you then? I mean all the dinners, the movies, the nights at the opera…you can't honestly tell me he's going to all that trouble just for sex."

"No, of course not. He's going out with me because having me on his arm enhances his social position."

"I don't…what are you talking about?" Jane asked, now completely lost.

"Gerald is using his association with me to advance his own social status amongst Boston's elite," Maura explained patiently. "Once he has achieved a high enough status, he will end our relationship and move on to someone less…strange to spend his time with," she finished dispassionately.

Jane felt her heart tearing apart listening to her friend be so dismissive of herself. "Maura you can't be right about that," she protested gently.

"I am," Maura said evenly. "And it's ok, Jane. I've known from the first time we went out what his intentions were."

Unable to believe what she was hearing, Jane straightened up and crossed her arms over her chest. "He told you he was only interested in you as a way to climb up the high society ladder?" she asked skeptically.

"No, of course, not, but it's not as if he's the first man to realize that the perks to dating an Isles outweigh the downsides to dating someone as strange as me, at least for a while anyway."

"Ok first off, stop referring to yourself as 'strange,'" Jane said tersely. "And second, if you really believe he's just using you for your social status, why are you putting up with him?"

Maura shrugged matter-of-factly. "Because I'm using him too," she said simply.

Jane's mouth dropped open in shock. "What?"

"I'm using him too," the blonde repeated calmly.

"Maura, don't try to tell me that you're worried about how others see you socially," Jane scoffed. "Or that you'd date someone just because it made you look good to people in Boston's elite society," she continued, nearly sneering her words at the end.

"No, of course not. I'm using Gerald because sometimes I get tired of feeling alone."

Jane lifted her left hand to briefly rub her temples. "When will you get this?" she asked. The detective stepped forward and then reached out and took Maura's hand in her own. "You're not alone anymore. You have friends and family who care about you–"

"I don't mean that kind of alone, Jane," Maura interrupted, softly but firmly. "Sometimes I need someone to go with me to charity events or political dinners, or art films, or–"

"You have me for that."

"We both know you hate going to those things, Jane," Maura said.

The detective grimaced. There was no hint of recrimination in Maura's voice. She was simply stating a fact that they both knew to be true. Still, Jane felt guilty. She knew that Maura frequently put up with things that Jane liked but that held no interest for the medical examiner, and truth be told, she complained about it far less than Jane did when she was forced to go along with something Maura liked. She owed her friend better than that, especially if her whining was forcing Maura to spend time with an asshole like Gerald just so she had someone to go to stuff with her.

"I'm sorry. I should be better about doing things you like to do."

"It's alright, Jane, there's no reason for you to be sorry for anything. To be honest, Gerald may have his faults, but he's also excellent company at social events, and it's nice to go to the opera or watch foreign films with someone who actually enjoys them too. And besides," she continued, when she saw Jane getting ready to protest again, "Even if you did learn to enjoy going to those things with me, you still can't help me with _all_ the forms that my loneliness takes," Maura finished quietly, her words spoken with open, raw honesty.

"Oh," Jane said, blinking in surprise. "Oh," she repeated, as the full meaning of Maura's words penetrated her consciousness.

"Yes…'oh,'" Maura said. "Sometimes I need to feel wanted…desired…even if it's only for a little while."

"Even if it's not real?" Jane asked, unable to stop herself.

"Sometimes it's easier when it's not real."

Jane studied their joined hands while she considered her friend's response, trying to understand what Maura meant. Finally giving up, she looked up at the other woman again. "You aren't using Gerald," she said quietly.

A small smile played at the corners of Maura's mouth. "You're just saying that because I'm your friend."

Jane tightened her hold on Maura's hand when she began to pull away from the detective's grasp. "Do you think I'm using Erin?"

"It's not the same thing, Jane."

"How is it any different?"

"It's different because you both have agreed to a temporary relationship that includes various dating elements, up to and including sexual intercourse, that will end when Erin returns to New York City. Gerald and I, however, have made no such agreement. He takes what he wants from the relationship, while I take what I want from it, all the while maintaining the illusion to ourselves and everyone else that we are, in fact, a couple with a potential future together."

Jane shook her head. "No," she said firmly. "The only one using anyone here is Gerald. You're not asking for anything more from him than what you are offering."

Maura chuckled softly. "I still think you're biased because you're my friend, but I'll take it," she said, squeezing Jane's hand affectionately.

"You're right, I'm biased. There's also the fact that Gerald is a total dick." Seeing Maura's wide-eyed look, Jane shrugged unapologetically. "Hey, you said I didn't have to keep acting like I like him anymore."

Maura grinned. "I hate to have to break this to you, but your performance wasn't particularly convincing."

Before Jane think of a suitable comeback, her cell phone began to ring. Releasing Maura's hand, she pulled out her phone from her jacket and looked at the screen. "It's Detective Ramsey. He said he'd call once he finished reviewing the remaining files."

"Go ahead," Maura said. "I need to check on Bass and give him his dinner."

Jane swiped her thumb across the screen of her phone and then lifted it to her ear. "Rizzoli," she said, as she watched Maura walk out of the room.

The files had turned up nothing else of importance, so Detective Ramsey had little new information to relate regarding the case. He did, however, let Jane know that the results of the analyses of the additional blood samples found at the crime scene would be completed by Monday, and that once they had the results, they could decide what to do next. After agreeing to meet Monday afternoon to discuss their options, Jane ended the call and returned her phone to the inside pocket of her jacket.

Her conversation with Ramsey finished, Jane's thoughts immediately went back to the conversation she had just had with Maura. She had never considered the possibility that Maura was dating Gerald simply as a "temporarily" arrangement. Of course, she wasn't entirely clear on whether Maura's relationship with Gerald was the kind of relationship the medical examiner preferred, or if Maura was settling for the only kind of relationship she thought she could have. If it was the latter, then Jane needed to find a way to make her friend realize that she deserved more. If it was the former…

If it was the former, then what exactly? What difference did it make to her if, like Jane, Maura preferred to keep her relationships casual and brief? It wasn't as if she was considering the idea of trying to have some sort of "friends with benefits" situation with Maura, was she?

Jane shook her head, forcefully dismissing the thought. She was being ridiculous. For one thing, Maura had made it clear that she no longer got involved with women. For another, even if Maura would consider the idea of being with a woman again, they had both agreed that it would be stupid for the two of them to engage in any kind of sexual relationship with one another. The knowledge that Maura apparently shared her views regarding relationships didn't change the fact that crossing the line from friends to lovers would almost certainly just set off a ticking time bomb that would eventually blow up in their faces.

The detective's thoughts were abruptly interrupted by the sound of her phone notifying her that she had received a text message. Retrieving her phone from her pocket once again, she was surprised to see that she had a message from Erin.

'_Fun day at the airport. Flight delayed twice and finally cancelled.'_

Jane frowned. Apparently Maura's comments about problems at Logan were right on the mark. '_So you're still in town?' _she texted back.

Erin's reply came back quickly. _'Yeah. Soonest they can rebook me is Monday afternoon. Think I'll just reschedule and go next month.'_

Jane exhaled softly while she considered how to respond. Before she could reach a decision, another text from Erin appeared on her phone.

'_Any plans for tonight? I could come over and we could get snowed in together.''_

Jane cast a quick glance at the doorway that Maura had disappeared through. Up until a few minutes ago, the detective had been under the impression that Maura was having dinner with Gerald, so she had never once considered the possibility of the two of them spending the evening together. But with Gerald stuck in Chicago, it would be the most logical thing in the world for Jane to stay over at Maura's for dinner and a movie. After all, she and Maura hadn't spent a lot of time together the past week, and it would be nice to just relax and enjoy the evening with her best friend.

On the other hand, she certainly couldn't deny that the idea of spending the night and a good part of tomorrow trapped inside with Erin was very, very appealing. As an added benefit, the snow would keep her mother at home and prevent her from dropping in unexpectedly to find Jane and Erin together, meaning that for once, she didn't have to worry about any messy confrontations or their equally messy follow-up conversations.

'_Sounds perfect,' _Jane typed. '_I'm about to leave Maura's. I'll pick up some food and be at my place in 45 minutes.'_

'_You're at Maura's? You sure I'm not interrupting any plans?'_

For a moment, Jane wavered, but she realized after a few moments that there was no reason for her hesitation. She would never break plans with Maura just to hook up with someone else, nor would she abandon her friend if Maura needed someone to be there for her and support her. But neither of those scenarios described the situation she was in now. Maura wouldn't be upset with her for wanting to spend the evening with Erin.

'_No plans. Just picking up Jo from my mother's.'_

Erin's response was quick and to the point._ 'OK. See you in about an hour.'_

Hearing footsteps, Jane looked up to see Maura walking back into the room. "Bass enjoying his dinner?" she asked, as she slipped her phone back into her pocket.

Maura smiled. "He is, and now that Bass has his dinner, what about you?"

"Me?"

Maura laughed lightly. "Dinner, movie…Jo's here so you can spend the night and we can get snowed in together."

Jane felt herself flush at the idea of getting "snowed in" with Maura. Of course, it wouldn't mean the same thing as being snowed in with Erin…or would it? The questions she had asked herself before came roaring back in full force: would Maura be interested in adding sex to the list of things that they did together? And if so, would Jane be interested too? If she were to be completely honest with herself, Jane knew that the answer to that question was a resounding 'yes.'

Which was exactly why she needed to go home now.

"Oh…um, thanks, but I should be going," Jane said, as she began moving towards the door leading out to Maura's courtyard.

Maura's brows drew downward in a confused frown. "You're leaving? Did something come up with the case?"

"Huh? Oh, no. Ramsey was just letting me know that the analyses of the samples they sent to the lab should be ready Monday morning. But I need to get to the store and get food to stock up for the storm before the place gets cleared out by everyone else."

"Are you sure? We could build a fire later. I even have marshmallows you could roast."

Jane hesitated for a moment, as the idea of sitting cuddled in front of a fire with Maura filled her thoughts. The image was unbelievably tempting…too tempting in fact. It was just one more reason that she needed to put some distance between herself and Maura for a while. The truth of the matter was that ultimately, nothing had really changed between the two of them. She just needed some time to process what she had just learned. Once she had, she'd be fine again with their relationship continuing just as it was.

Jane forced what she hoped was a reassuring smile onto her face. "I'm sure," she said, before calling for Jo.

Maura frowned slightly as she studied the detective carefully. "Is everything alright?"

Jane grimaced internally. As much as she knew that Maura would understand if she told her that she was going to spend the night with Erin, Jane was reluctant to do so. The odds were all but certain that Maura and Angela would end up talking tomorrow, and at some point, Angela would likely comment on the fact that Jane wasn't around. That would put Maura in the awkward position of having to keep Jane's "secret," and once Angela realized that Maura knew something, it would only be a matter of time before she got the information out of her.

"Everything's fine," Jane said. "I just think it would be better for Jo and me to spend the night at our place tonight." It wasn't a lie exactly. It just wasn't a complete answer. She could always explain later if the issue came up again.

"Alright, if you think that would be best," Maura replied, obviously disappointed. "Breakfast at the café Monday?"

Jane bent down and picked up Jo. "Let's make it lunch," she said. If Erin ended up spending the night tomorrow, Jane certainly wasn't going to toss her out the door Monday morning without breakfast.

"Alright, lunch it is," Maura replied. "Text me when you get home so that I know you made it there safely?"

Jane nodded. "Sure, and I'll see you Monday," she promised, before turning and walking out the door.


	7. President's Day

**AN: So by my standards, this is a pretty short chapter at only 2,700 words. **

**A couple things I figured I should address...first, a few people have questioned where this story is with regard to the timeline of the show. Essentially it's set somewhere in season 5ish with a couple caveats, namely that Jane was never pregnant, and there was no Jack. I'm not planning on ever addressing either of these events, and they would only serve to complicate a couple things I intend to write, even if they are presumed to have happened in the past.**

**Second, while I absolutely guarantee Rizzles is endgame here, there will be other individuals in Maura's and Jane's lives before that finally occurs. These are two women in their 30s...they're allowed to have relationships with other people while they are figuring out what they really want. And no, I'm not going to be describing those other relationships in any great detail (i.e., there will never be an "Erin and Jane chapter" where we see them dating), but they will exist. So if you can't read about Maura and Jane dating someone else without referring to them as desperate horny sluts in your reviews, well this isn't the story for you.**

_**Voting has started for the Rizzles awards, so head on over, read some great stories, and show your love by voting for your favs.**_

* * *

><p>"Hey."<p>

Maura looked up from her laptop when she heard Jane's voice. "Hey yourself," she replied, smiling at the sight of her friend standing in the doorway of her office. "Glad to see you were able to make it in alright."

The detective grimaced slightly. "Well there were a few moments when my car and I didn't agree on where we should be headed, but nothing worse than what I've dealt with already this winter. How about you? Any problems?"

"Nothing serious. Fortunately the roads were plowed and salted before I needed to start my commute."

Jane nodded towards the laptop on Maura's desk as she shifted her weight back and forth on her feet. "Are you working on something important?"

"I'm finishing up a performance review for our new pathology resident, Dr. Jacobs." Noting how the other woman was fidgeting, Maura's couldn't help but grin. "You're looking for the report on the knife, aren't you?"

Jane nodded sheepishly. "Yeah, is it ready yet?"

"As a matter of fact, it is," Maura said. The medical examiner stood up and walked over to push past her friend so that she could step outside her office. "Susie, could you get the weapons report on Detective Ramsey's suspect for Detective Rizzoli please?"

"Of course, Dr. Isles," Susie immediately replied.

Maura stepped back into her office and returned to her desk. "I believe you're going to be happy with the results," she said casually.

The detective's eyes lit up with excitement. "Really? Is it the same knife that was used to kill the BCU students?"

Maura frowned and shook her head. "You know I can't actually confirm that it was the same knife, Jane," she admonished her friend, as she began to type away on her laptop. "But I can say that the knife matches the physical characteristics of the weapon that was used in the BCU murders, so it's definitely possible that it is the same knife."

Jane sat down on the chair she hated the least in Maura's office. "All things considered, that was the best result we could have hoped for so I'll take it."

Maura looked over at her friend. "How are you feeling? Any lingering issues from your fall Saturday?"

Jane shrugged carelessly. "No problems. And other than hating winter even more today than I did last week, I'm feeling fine. I can't believe we got another foot of snow."

"The storm was definitely one of the worst we've had in a while. I certainly didn't envy you having to take Jo outside yesterday in the middle of it."

"Yeah, neither of us were very thrilled about it," Jane grumbled.

Maura began typing again. "To tell you the truth, I was a little worried when you didn't respond to my texts asking how the two of you were doing until late last night. I was half afraid that you took Jo out and never made it back to your apartment."

"Yeah…sorry about that. I wasn't on call, so I wasn't paying a lot of attention to my phone."

Maura looked up at her friend curiously. While it was true that there would have been no reason for Jane to have been worried about missing phone calls from work yesterday, it was still unlike her to completely ignore her phone for hours on end. "Are you sure you weren't having problems because of your fall?"

"No, I was just busy…you know, tied up doing stuff," the detective said vaguely.

"'Doing stuff'?" Maura asked, thoroughly confused by Jane's response. "What kind of 'stuff'?"

Jane shifted uncomfortably in her chair. "Erin came over and we were…you know…occupied," she replied, somehow managing to look everywhere in Maura's office except at the medical examiner herself.

Maura frowned and shook her head "I don't understand. I thought you said that Erin flew to Ohio and wouldn't be back until Wednesday."

The detective shrugged. "That was the plan, but her flight got delayed a couple times and then finally got cancelled."

"Oh," Maura replied with a small nod of acceptance. Despite herself, though, she felt a flash of annoyance arc through her. She turned back to her computer and resumed her work on the performance review, trying to dismiss the feeling for the foolish emotion that it was. They had both agreed that the two of them would never work as a couple. And even though Maura now knew that Jane actually could be interested in a short-term, physical relationship, she still had no doubts that their decision not to cross the line between friends and lovers had been the right one for both of them. There was no reason that it should bother her that Jane had spent the previous day with her lover. Absolutely no reason at all.

And yet it did.

As much as she tried to fight it, Maura found herself struggling with feelings of envy every time Erin's name was mentioned. The simple truth was that it bothered her that Erin was filling a role in Jane's life that Maura was unable to fill. It didn't matter that that role involved doing things that the medical examiner couldn't allow herself to do with Jane. It also didn't matter to her that Jane had made it clear that her relationship with Erin was casual and temporary, so there was no reason for her to be concerned that Erin would ever take Jane away from her. The medical examiner still had to deal with the reality that there was a part of her that desperately wanted Jane, wanted _all_ of Jane, but Erin was the one who actually got to be with her.

Determinedly pushing those feelings aside, Maura fell back to what had long ago become her go to method for dealing with the fact that she was attracted to her best friend but would never be able to truly have her: teasing and flirting and pretending that she didn't care about Jane being involved with someone else. "Having your flight delayed and then canceled can be very frustrating," she mused. She glanced at Jane out of the corner of her eyes, a small smirk tugging at her lips. "I hope you did everything you could to relieve her tension."

"I did my best," Jane replied evenly.

Seeing that her friend was refusing to rise to the bait, Maura decided to up the ante. "I'm curious, though," she began casually, her eyes fixed firmly on her computer screen. "When you said that you were 'tied up'–"

"No! I did not mean that literally," Jane said quickly, cutting the blonde off before she could finish her question.

"Just checking," Maura said, carefully schooling her expression so that her features were the picture of innocence. "I didn't want to misinterpret what you were trying to convey to me about your carnal activities."

The blonde heard her friend mutter something unintelligible under her breath, but knowing that Jane would likely refuse to repeat herself, she continued to work on the review. She knew from experience that Jane would never provide any actual details about what went on between her and any of her sexual partners, and truth be told, these days the medical examiner was truly grateful for that fact. It was hard enough knowing that Jane was having sex with someone else. Hearing about the actual things that they were doing together would be just too much to handle.

With a few last keystrokes, Maura finished the review and saved the file. Leaning back in her chair, she returned her attention to her friend. While she had been working, the detective had moved to stand near the window and was looking out into the lab. As she watched the other woman, a thought suddenly struck her. "So when did they finally get around to cancelling Erin's flight?" she asked curiously. She had been stuck in that situation before, and she knew that an airline could drag things out for hours before it finally admitted that its plane wasn't actually going anywhere. Hopefully for Erin's sake, it hadn't been too terribly late before she had been able to get out of the airport and over to Jane's.

For several moments, the detective appeared not to have heard Maura's question. "She texted me around 6:00 to tell me that her flight was cancelled," Jane finally said.

The blonde frowned when she heard her friend's reply. While she hadn't been paying a lot of attention to the time yesterday afternoon, she knew that Jane had been at her home somewhere around then. "6:00?"

Jane continued to face away from the medical examiner, preventing Maura from gathering any clues about what she was thinking from facial cues. "Uh huh," she mumbled.

Maura closed her laptop. "So…she texted you right _after_ you left my place?"

Jane turned around to face her friend. "Actually, she texted me right _before_ I left your place." Seeing Maura's confused expression, the detective gestured awkwardly before continuing. "While you were checking on Bass."

Maura slowly stood up and walked around to the front of her desk. "So you knew that her flight was cancelled and that she was still in town before you left?"

"Yeah."

Maura brow furrowed slightly, as she tried to make sense of what she was hearing. "I don't understand. Why didn't you tell me she was still in town?"

"I didn't think it mattered," Jane said with a diffident shrug.

Maura's left eyebrow arched upward as she looked at her friend in disbelief. "If you didn't think it mattered, you would have told me your plans."

"Not necessarily," Jane denied.

"Really?" Maura asked skeptically. "If Erin hadn't texted you to let you know that she was still in town, would you have accepted my invitation to stay for dinner?"

For several long, silent seconds, the detective held Maura's gaze, before finally lowering her head slightly and looking away. "Probably," she admitted.

"Which means that the fact that Erin was still in town and you were planning on seeing her affected your decision," Maura pointed out, her "victory" feeling completely hollow. "So how can you think that it didn't 'matter' that she was still in town?" she demanded, her irritation with Jane's evasive answers beginning to rise.

The detective held up her hands in surrender. "Look, Maura, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told Erin it was ok to come over."

Maura closed her eyes briefly and drew in a deep breath. "Jane," she said, slowly, choosing her words with care and deliberation. "I'm not upset that you spent the night with Erin instead of spending the night with me."

The detective's brow creased slightly. "You're not?"

"No, of course not," Maura replied, a hard edge of exasperation tingeing her voice despite her best efforts to remain calm. "You and I aren't a couple. You can see whomever you want whenever you want, and in any case, you made your plans with Erin before I asked you to stay for dinner."

Jane ran a hand through her hair and shook her head slightly. "Ok, then what's the problem?"

"The 'problem' is that this is the second time you've hidden the fact that you were going to spend time with Erin from me," Maura replied curtly, her patience rapidly beginning to slip away.

Jane heaved a huge sigh and rolled her eyes. "You are making waaaaay more out of this than you need to."

"Am I?" the medical examiner challenged her friend. "The first time it happened, you told me that you weren't comfortable with me knowing about your date with Erin because you were uncertain about what was appropriate for you to share with me, and you were worried about hurting me. I thought we settled that."

"We did."

"Then why are you still hiding your plans with Erin from me?"

"God, Maura," Jane growled. "Can't you just drop this?"

"Not until you tell me the truth," Maura replied, crossing her arms over her chest.

The seconds passed by in silence as the two women glared at each other stubbornly.

"Fine," Jane said grimly. "You want the truth? The 'truth' is that I was worried that if you knew I was spending the rest of the weekend with Erin, you'd end up telling my mother about her."

Maura's mouth dropped open in shock. "You actually think I would tell Angela about you and Erin? How could you think I'd do something like that?"

"Seriously, Maura?" Jane shot back, throwing her hands up in the air and gesturing wildly. "You _can't_ _lie_, and my mother is one of the greatest interrogators who's ever lived." Seeing Maura getting ready to argue with her, the detective hurriedly continued. "Tell me, did you see my mother yesterday?"

"Of course. She came over after Tommy came by to shovel out everything for us."

"And did my name come up? Did she make some comment about the fact that I wasn't there?"

"She did," Maura conceded. "She was surprised that you hadn't spent the night."

"Uh huh…and just how long do you think you could have kept Erin from my mother if she'd suspected for even a second that I was with someone yesterday?" Jane asked triumphantly. "Hell, you should thank me for not putting you in that position to begin with."

Maura felt her temper rise in response to the detective's patronizing attitude "You're right," she replied derisively. "Thank you so much for having so little faith in me. That was very considerate of you."

"Aww come on," Jane groaned in frustration. "It's bad enough that you could accidentally tell Ma about Erin anyway. Don't be mad at me just because I didn't see any reason to increase the chances of it happening by telling you I was going to spend the rest of the weekend with her."

Maura studied Jane carefully, as a slow realization began to dawn on her. "Do you regret telling me about Erin?"

"That's not what I said," Jane protested.

"And that's not an answer," Maura replied quietly.

The seconds ticked by as a silence thick as mud oozed between the two women.

A light knock on the door followed by the sound of it opening abruptly caught Maura's attention. Susie stepped in the room with a smile that instantly vanished when she caught sight of the two women facing each other stiffly. Clearing her throat nervously, Susie handed a folder to Jane and then beat a hasty retreat, closing the door quietly behind her.

Maura moved back around her desk to sit in her chair and then opened up her laptop. She was angry, and she was hurt, and it was taking every ounce of control that she possessed not to yell at Jane to get out of her office, but she would be damned if she would give the detective the satisfaction of seeing her react as anything other than a professional. "As I said," she began stiffly, "The results of the tests show that the knife found in the suspect's apartment matches the physical characteristics of the weapon that was used to kill the victims in your cold case. Now if there's nothing else that you need, I should to get back to work. We're extremely busy down here at the moment."

Jane hesitated briefly, and then nodded and began walking towards the door. She paused with her hand on the knob and looked back at the medical examiner. "Maura, we need to talk about this, but not here at the precinct. Can we go somewhere other than the café for lunch?"

Maura looked up at the other woman, her features carefully schooled in a neutral expression. "Actually, Jane, I won't be able to have lunch with you today."

"Oh, ok," the detective replied. "I get it. You're too busy to take time for lunch. Maybe…"

"No," Maura interrupted quietly but firmly. "I mean yes, I am busy but that's not why I can't have lunch with you."

"Okay," Jane said slowly, her confusion evident on her face. "Then why can't you have lunch with me?"

"Because I don't want to," Maura said, her voice cold and exact, and dripping with disdain. She allowed her words to sink in for a few moments before continuing. "As you said, I can't lie. I don't want to risk a case of hives by allowing you to believe that I'm passing on lunch with you because I'm busy."

For several seconds, Jane held Maura's gaze, a slight tightening of her jaw the only outward indication that she had even heard the medical examiner's answer. Then, without another word, the detective opened the door and walked out of Maura's office.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So yeah, I know, Jane is not at her best here. All I ask before you rake her (and me) over the coals is to have just a small amount of faith and wait until the next chapter first.<strong>


	8. Chinese New Year: Part 1

**AN: Sorry about the delay. I had one issue that I felt absolutely had to be addressed here, but I went round and round on POV and what else got discussed here as opposed to the next couple chapters. **

* * *

><p><strong>February 19 - Chinese New Year: Part 1<strong>

Jane walked through the morgue towards Maura's office, nodding politely to Senior Criminalist Susie Chang as she did so. It had been three days since her fight with Maura. Three days she had not seen, spoken to, or even so much as texted her friend. Three days telling herself that she would be damned if she would make the first move to apologize.

Three lonely, miserable days trying to convince herself that she was right, and Maura was wrong.

To say that the detective had been frustrated and angry when she had left the medical examiner's office Monday would have been putting it mildly. They had agreed that there was nothing between them, which meant that she didn't owe Maura any explanation regarding who she chose to spend her time with. Hell, if she didn't want to share that information with Maura at all, that was within her rights too. After all, if Jane had told her about Erin Saturday night, Angela would have learned that her daughter liked to sleep with women by Sunday afternoon. Keeping information from Maura Isles was a critical element in keeping information from Angela Rizzoli. The detective was more than justified in her decision not to tell Maura about her plans with Erin, and damn Maura for trying to make her think otherwise!

Once she'd had a chance to calm down and take a step back, however, Jane had had to admit that she wasn't blameless for their fight. She hadn't exactly lied to Maura Saturday night, but she hadn't exactly been honest either. And while she still felt that Maura had overreacted to the whole situation, the detective understood why the blonde had been hurt by the fact that Jane hadn't said anything about spending the rest of the weekend with Erin. They were best friends, and best friends didn't deliberately hide information like that from one another. To make matters worse, she had placed the blame for her actions on Maura, using the other woman's inability to lie as justification for not telling her the truth.

Of course, all of this could have been avoided in the first place if Jane had just said "no" to Erin's suggestion and spent Saturday night with Maura. There were multiple problems with that solution, however. For one thing, there really hadn't been any reason for her to turn Erin down. After all, if Erin hadn't been planning on flying home to Ohio, the two of them would almost certainly have planned on spending Saturday night together. And it wasn't as if she had broken off plans with Maura to spend the rest of the weekend with Erin. Erin has asked first, and Jane had accepted.

The real problem, though, was that Jane knew that her reasons for deciding to spend the weekend with Erin instead of Maura weren't entirely based on "who asked first." Ultimately, her decision had been based as much on wanting to spend the night with Erin, as it had been on being afraid to spend the night with Maura.

The exact nature of her relationship with her best friend was becoming extremely confusing for the detective. The flirting, the teasing…all of it was beginning to seem a bit too "real," and she wasn't entirely certain anymore if that was a bad thing, or a good thing. The simple truth was that it was getting harder and harder to resist the urge to push the boundaries of their friendship and see what could happen between them, especially now that she knew that Maura wasn't actually interested in Gerald as anything more than a temporary distraction. Part of her wanted to believe that she could have her cake and eat it too. After all, she was having a casual sexual relationship with Erin, and that was working out just fine. Why couldn't she have the same sort of relationship with Maura?

The detective sighed to herself, recognizing the fallacy behind her wishful thinking for exactly what it was. Her no-strings-attached relationship with Erin worked precisely because there was nothing to their relationship beyond the sexual component. Sure, they might occasionally have dinner or coffee, or even go out dancing or catch a movie together, but all of those activities were just a means to an ends, where the "ends" was winding up in bed together. Her involvement with Erin was based solely on sex, which meant that as soon as either one of them was ready to end that part of the relationship, the relationship would be over. The two of them would go their separate ways, and never have to deal with the other one again.

Jane's relationship with Maura, on the other hand, was complicated and involved. They were best friends who worked together and spent the majority of their free time with one another. Hell, Maura was basically a member of Jane's family. Even if the two of them could somehow manage to avoid the pitfalls of adding a sexual component to their relationship for a while, what would happen when one of them inevitably lost interest? What would happen when one of them decided that she wanted to pursue someone else? How could things be anything other than awkward and uncomfortable for them once they were no longer sleeping together, but were still integral parts of each other's daily lives?

Coming to a stop in front of the door to Maura's office, Jane forced her muddled thoughts from her head and knocked lightly. Hearing her friend call out to come in, she took a deep breath and then opened the door to find the medical examiner sitting in a chair looking through a folder. "Hey," Jane said hesitantly, not at all certain what kind of reception to expect.

A small but genuine smile appeared on Maura's face. "Hi."

"Can I come in?" the detective asked, wanting to be sure that she was welcome before she barged her way in to Maura's space.

"Of course," the blonde replied, closing the folder and lowering it to rest on her lap "I understand that congratulations are in order. I heard that Mr. Blascoe confessed."

"Thanks," Jane said, relieved that Maura no longer appeared angry and was willing to speak with her. She closed the door to the medical examiner's office and leaned back against it. "And thanks for your help with the knife. We never could have gotten the warrant if we hadn't been able to match Blascoe's knife to the description of the weapon used for the murders."

"Susie was the one who did the actual analysis. You should thank her."

"Yeah, I'll do that."

An awkward stillness enveloped the room, as each of them considered what to say next.

"I'm sorry I–"

"I'm sorry I–"

Both women fell silent when they heard the other begin to speak. They looked at each other uncertainly, trying to decide what to do, before Jane nodded at her friend. "Go ahead."

Maura carefully placed the file she was holding down on the table in front of her, taking time to gather her thoughts. After a few moments, she lifted her gaze to meet her friend's. "I wish Monday had been Groundhog Day," she said wryly. "I'd really like to try that conversation again."

Jane grinned, feeling some of the tension leave the room. She moved to sit on the end of the couch near her friend. "Yeah, me too," she agreed.

"What would you do differently?" Maura asked.

"I'd tell you about spending the weekend with Erin right from the start instead of trying to hide it from you," Jane replied immediately, not needing to think about her answer. Regardless of what she should or should not have done Saturday, there was no doubt in her mind what she should have done Monday. "What about you?"

The medical examiner shook her head slightly, a small frown slipping across her face. "I wouldn't ask about Erin at all. The less I know about her, the easier things are for me," she said ruefully.

Jane nodded in understanding. "Yeah, I get it. I feel the same way about Gerald."

Maura's brows lifted questioningly. "What?"

Jane shrugged and looked away. She hadn't intended to have this conversation now, but if Maura could admit that she didn't want to hear about Erin, Jane could admit the same about Gerald. "I don't like hearing you talk about Gerald, especially when it involves the two of you doing something together as a couple," she confessed, trying but only partially succeeding at keeping the bitterness she felt towards Gerald out of her voice. "I know we agreed that we can't be together and I have no right to be jealous, but I can't help it. Every time I think about you and him together," she continued, as she turned back to look at her friend, "I just want to…" Jane paused when she saw Maura gaping at her in wide-eyed surprise. "What?"

Maura blinked and closed her mouth. "That wasn't what I meant," she said slowly.

The detective shifted uneasily, a flicker of apprehension tickling along her spine. "It wasn't?"

Maura shook her head. "No, not at all," she replied.

Embarrassment flooded through the detective as she realized her mistake. She could feel the heat stealing into her face, and she knew that her cheeks must be flushed crimson. Before she could make a move to escape, however, Maura reached out and caught her by the hand. "But just because it's not what I meant, it doesn't mean it's not how I feel."

For several seconds, the detective remained frozen in place, trying to determine if there was any way that she could be misinterpreting what the other woman was saying. "Really?" she finally asked.

Maura nodded. "It's…difficult for me to hear about you spending time with Erin. And I hate that I feel like that. I hate that I feel envious and possessive when I should be happy that you've found someone who makes you happy. And most of the time I am, but sometimes…" The medical examiner's voice trailed off and she shrugged helplessly.

Jane lowered her head briefly to look at Maura's hand holding her own, before looking back up at her friend. "Sometimes you wish it was you."

For a few moments, the two women gazed at each other in silence, both of them understanding exactly how the other one felt because they each felt the same way. "Sometimes I do," Maura admitted. She sighed softly and shook her head. "I'm not very good at sharing you with other people."

Jane exhaled heavily. "I'm not very good at sharing you either."

Maura's thumb lightly stroked across the back of Jane's hand. "We need to get better at it," she said quietly.

"I dunno…resenting everyone you've dated has worked pretty well for me the last five years. Why change now?" Jane asked only half in jest.

Maura tilted her head to the side. "Because you're a mature adult," she said, her response part statement, part question.

"When did I agree to that?" Jane grumbled, earning a small smile from her friend.

"Alright, then how about because otherwise we're just going to drive ourselves crazy?" Maura asked.

Knowing the other woman was right, the detective nodded in acceptance. "Just give me some time, ok?"

"As long as you'll give me time too," Maura agreed with a smile.

Jane squeezed Maura's hand lightly and then released it. "I have to go meet with Detective Ramsey to tie up some details about the case and then I'm off for the rest of the day. How about coming over to my place tonight for dinner?"

"I'd like that," Maura said sincerely.

"Great," Jane said, as she pushed herself up from the couch. "I'll have dinner ready around 7:00." The detective started walking towards the door, but then stopped as a thought struck her. "So what _did_ you mean?" she asked curiously.

"Hmmm?"

"When you said it was easier for you not to know anything about Erin? What did you mean?"

"Oh, that," Maura said with a dismissive wave. "I simply meant that the less I know about her, the less likely it is that I could let something about her slip to Angela."

A pang of remorse shot through the detective, as she realized that she hadn't actually addressed the rest of what had happened Monday. It was bad enough that she hadn't been honest with her friend. Shifting the blame for her behavior onto the blonde had been a low blow to say the least. "I'm sorry. It wasn't fair of me to say that to you."

"Why not? It was the truth," Maura said matter-of-factly, without a hint of reproach in her voice. "I admit I was upset at first, but once I had a chance to think about it, I realized you were right. If you'd told me that you were spending the weekend with Erin, I probably would have told your mother about her when she was asking me about you on Sunday. Angela would have found out that you're interested in women, and it would have been my fault."

Jane closed her eyes and lifted a hand to rub across her face. She drew in a deep breath and then exhaled slowly as she collected her thoughts. It was time to take responsibility for her actions, or rather, her inactions. The real problem was not Maura's inability to lie; it was Jane's lack of courage. She walked back over to sit beside her friend once more. "No," she said quietly, as she met Maura's gaze, "It would have been _my_ fault."

"How would it have been your fault?" Maura asked, her face a mask of confusion.

"Maura, there is nothing stopping me from telling my mother that I like women except for the fact that I'm too much of a coward to tell her," Jane pointed out evenly. "Hell, I could text her right now and tell her if I wanted to."

A look of concern immediately appeared on Maura's face. "Actually, although I firmly believe that your mother will be completely accepting when you do decide to tell her, I don't think you should inform her by text message. It's unlikely that she would appreciate receiving that sort of information through such an impersonal medium."

For a few seconds, Jane simply stared at her friend, her emotions vacillating between disbelief, amusement, and affection. "So how about email?" she finally quipped.

A sheepish grin appeared on Maura's face at the realization that Jane was teasing her. "I would recommend against it."

"Ok, good to know," Jane said with a smirk, before her expression grew sober again. She reached out and took Maura's hands in her own. "Look, if something happens and you end up telling my mother the truth before I get up the guts to do it, that's on me, not you. OK?"

"Jane–" Maura began to protest.

The detective squeezed her friend's hands and shook her head to cut her off. "OK?" she asked again, the tone of her voice making it clear she had no intention of accepting any other answer.

Maura nodded her head in agreement. "Ok, but I've already taken steps to make certain that it's not going to be an issue anyway."

"What do you mean?" Jane asked warily.

"I mean that I identified the different ways that your mother could ask me personal questions about you that could result in my revealing the fact that you like women to her. I then devised appropriate responses to all of them so that I will be ready no matter what she might ask."

For a few moments, Jane simply stared at her friend, completely tongue-tied by Maura's casual announcement. Eventually, though, she managed to find her voice. "Maura, that's impossible. Do you have any idea how many different ways Ma could ask you about this?"

"Seven."

"What?"

"There are seven different ways," Maura said patiently.

"Oh come on, be realistic," the detective scoffed. "There are dozens, hell hundreds of ways my mother could come at you on this."

"True," Maura agreed, "But ultimately they all fall into one of seven categories."

Jane rolled her eyes and shook her head at her friend's naiveté. "Riiiight. And just how did you come to that conclusion?"

"Monday night I created a spreadsheet containing all the possible questions your mother could ask me that could lead to me telling her that you like women," Maura replied matter-of-factly, as if her 'solution' was simply the most obvious and practical way of handling the situation. "Afterwards, I grouped each of the questions into categories. After careful review, I realized that all of the questions fell into one of seven categories."

Jane stared at the blonde in amazement. Her knee jerk response here was to mock and ridicule everything that Maura was saying. There was just something so completely adorably 'Maura' about her friend's actions, however, that Jane couldn't help but find it absolutely endearing.

"Maura, that was really…nice of you to try, but not everything is a scientific problem that can be solved through analysis," Jane said slowly, struggling to keep all hints of sarcasm out of her voice. "There's no way you could have come up with an answer for every possible question that my mother could ask you."

"Actually, although I'm still refining the phrasing of a few of my responses, I'm quite certain that I'm ready for any scenario."

Throwing her hands up in exasperation, Jane gave up trying to reason with her friend. She would just have to prove to her that it couldn't be done. "Really? So if my mother says 'Has Jane mentioned anyone special,' you'll have an answer for that?" the detective asked sardonically.

Maura's lips curved into a confident smile. "Category one...questions revolving around the issue as to whether or not you are dating someone. My answer would be that 'Jane hasn't mentioned any men to me since she dated Lucas last fall.'"

Jane blinked in surprise, not really having expected the other woman to have such a ready answer. Her eyes narrowed slightly as she studied her friend. "Does Gerald have a friend you could set Jane up with?"

"Category four...questions revolving around the issue as to whether or not I could help to find a man for you." Maura chuckled softly and shook her head. "I think we've seen how much Jane likes the dates I've found for her in the past. I think it's best if I just stay out of the matchmaking game where she's concerned."

The detective's eyebrows shot up high on her forehead, again impressed by the other woman's easy response. She had obviously underestimated her friend. Still, Maura couldn't have an answer for everything. "Why can't Jane find a nice man?"

Maura shrugged. "Jane's job is undoubtedly intimidating to a lot of men. It would take someone very special to be able to deal with having a homicide detective for a wife."

Once again, Jane felt herself experiencing a surge of respect for her friend's efforts. But she knew there was one thing Maura couldn't get around…a direct question. "Is Jane gay?"

Maura met the detective's gaze unflinchingly. "She's never identified herself to me as such."

"I've never identified myself to you as gay?" Jane said skeptically.

Maura shrugged. "You have never explicitly used that term when referring to yourself. Besides, just because you are interested in women, that doesn't mean you are 'gay.' For all I know, you could be bisexual or pansexual."

Jane fell silent as she considered Maura's response. "Do you think Jane is gay?"

"As I said, she's never identified–"

"No…I'm not asking what you _know._ I'm asking what you _think_."

"I don't like to guess. You know that."

"I do, but I'm asking you to do it anyway. Tell me what you think."

Maura hesitated for a moment and then reached out to place her hand over Jane's. "What I think, Angela, is that _if_ Jane were gay, it wouldn't make any difference to either of us. We would both love her as much as we love her now. I personally don't feel any need to ask her about it, but if you do, then I think you need to talk to Jane about it yourself."

The detective brows drew downward in a frown. "Seriously? You'd avoid telling my mother that you think, hell, that you _know _I like women by telling her she needs to ask me herself?"

Maura flashed her friend a smug grin. "Yes, because we both know that your mother would never simply come out and ask you anything like that point-blank."

Jane's face broke into a grin as well, recognizing the truth of Maura's statement. Angela Rizzoli would never employ the direct route when trying to find out information about her children. If she couldn't get something out of Maura, her backup plan would be to try to get something out of Frankie. Jane, however, knew better than to tell her brother anything she didn't want her mother to find out about. While Frankie would never intentionally rat her out, Jane knew that her mother had been able to trick him into being her stool pigeon ever since they were kids.

Raising one hand up, Jane signaled her surrender. "I give. You're ready for anything my mother can throw at you," Jane conceded.

"Thank you," Maura replied, inclining her head slightly to accept her victory.

Jane glanced at her watch and then grimaced. "I really do need to go meet with Detective Ramsey before it gets any later." She stood up and crossed to the door. "Don't forget, dinner will be ready around 7:00."

Maura nodded. "I'll probably go home and change first and then I'll be over."

"Perfect," Jane said with a grin. "I'll see you then."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So my final solution for dealing with the tone and POV of this chapter was to split it into two parts. For reasons I'll explain in the next part, I am really looking forward to the end of this particular day.<strong>


	9. Chinese New Year: Part 2

**AN: So I apologize again for the absence. Long AN at the end explaining the situation I found myself in the last several months so I don't have to waste anyone's time with it here. Things are straightened out now and I should be able to start posting regularly again.  
><strong>

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><p><strong>February 19 - Chinese New Year – Part 2<strong>

Maura inhaled deeply, savoring the aroma coming from behind the door in front of her. Jane had apparently decided on Italian for their meal, and it smelled absolutely delicious. Smiling in approval at her friend's choice, Maura knocked firmly on the door to Jane's apartment.

The door opened mere seconds after she had finished knocking. "Perfect timing," Jane said, stepping back to allow the blonde to enter. "Dinner's almost ready."

Maura slipped out of her coat and handed it to the other woman. "And what are we having?"

"Baked rigatoni with a Caprese salad," Jane replied, hanging Maura's coat up on a nearby hook.

"It smells wonderful. Where's it from?"

"What?" Jane asked over her shoulder, as she began walking towards the kitchen.

"Where did you get dinner from?" Maura asked. "Calabria? Or did you try that new place on Summit Road?"

Jane turned around slowly and watched in silence as the medical examiner moved to sit down at the counter separating the kitchen from the living room. "I got it from my kitchen."

It took a few moments for the meaning of the other woman's response to register with the medical examiner. "You cooked dinner yourself?" she asked, her voice tinged with disbelief. "You're not just warming up take out in the oven?"

"You don't have to act so surprised," Jane huffed indignantly. "I do know how to cook."

Maura dipped her head slightly and fought back a smile. "Technically true, but it's not something you normally do if you can avoid it."

Jane rolled her eyes as her lips twisted into a grimace. "I don't usually feel like going to the effort after working all day, but I had the afternoon off, so I figured it'd be nice to have something besides take out for a change."

"Well, I appreciate you going to so much effort," Maura said sincerely. "I'm sure it will be delicious."

"That's better," Jane said, somewhat mollified. "And since you're being nice, you may have wine with your dinner," she continued, picking up an already open bottle from the counter.

"Thank you," Maura replied, her mouth curved in amusement.

Jane filled a glass for the medical examiner and then poured a second for herself. The detective handed the wine to the blonde. "_Salute!_" she said, extending her glass towards Maura's.

"_Salute!_" Maura replied, touching her glass lightly to Jane's. She took a sip and then nodded in approval. "Mmmm…very nice. Did you make this too?" she teased.

"Yup. Stomped the grapes last week."

Maura started to reply but paused when she heard her phone ring. Pulling it out, she frowned when she saw who was calling. She had told Gerald that she would be having dinner with Jane that evening, and had explicitly asked him to text her rather than call. She looked up at her friend. "It's Gerald," she said apologetically. "We're going to dinner and a play tomorrow night, and I asked him to let me know what time he would be picking me up."

Jane nodded in understanding. "Go on. I'll get the salads."

Maura swiped her thumb across the screen and lifted her phone to her ear, reaching for a pen and piece of paper as she did so. "Hello Gerald," she said, keeping the irritation she felt at being disturbed out of her voice through sheer force of will. She listened for a few moments while he talked about the plans he had made for the following night, jotting down a few details so that she wouldn't forget them. After about a minute had passed, though, and Gerald showed no sign of wrapping up the conversation, Maura politely, but firmly, did it for him.

With a small sigh, Maura placed her phone down on the counter and stared at it pensively. This wasn't the first time that Gerald had ignored her explicit request not to be called while she was with other people. All things being equal, she would have been content to see him for a few more months, but Gerald's continued inability, or perhaps more accurately, unwillingness, to respect her wishes and allow her her privacy and personal space, was causing the medical examiner to begin seriously questioning just how much she wanted to continue her involvement with him. In addition, despite what she had said to Jane, she had found Gerald's gifts on Valentine's Day to be far more extravagant than what was warranted based on the nature of their relationship. The bracelet he had given her was simply a ham-handed attempt to throw his wealth around in a misguided effort to impress her, and she was growing tired of ignoring the fact that he was nothing more than a social-climbing snob.

"You've really gotten good at that."

Blinking in mild confusion, Maura looked up at her friend. "What?"

Jane nodded towards Maura's hand. The medical examiner smiled wryly when she realized that she had been absently twirling the pen through her fingers. As strange as it might seem, she had discovered that she really enjoyed the activity. Not only was it an excellent exercise for improving her dexterity, she also found it oddly satisfying to master new moves. "What can I say…I have _very_ talented fingers," she said with a suggestive wink.

Jane coughed as she nearly choked on her wine. Wiping her mouth with the back of her hand, she shook her head at her friend. "Really, Maura?"

"I'm a doctor," the blonde pointed out, her eyes now wide in feigned innocence. She set the pen aside and reached for her salad. "Having nimble fingers tends to go with the job."

Jane rolled her eyes and carefully took another sip of her wine. "Yeah," she drawled, "That's what you were referring to."

Maura simply grinned cheekily at her friend and then picked up her fork. She took a small bite of the salad and then hummed appreciatively. "This is wonderful."

"Thanks," Jane replied. "The rigatoni should be ready in a few minutes."

Maura nodded as she used her fork to cut a tomato in half. "Is it one of your mother's recipes?" she asked curiously.

"Yeah, it was one of the first things she ever taught me to make." The detective paused for a moment, a reflective expression appearing on her face. "It was also one of the _last_ things she ever taught me to make. For some reason, cooking lessons with Ma have never really gone well."

"I can't imagine why that would be," Maura quipped.

"It's a mystery yet to be solved," Jane replied, a faint note of sarcasm lacing her voice. "But I suspect it's mostly due to the running commentary."

Maura paused just before she was about to take another bite of salad. "The running commentary?"

"Yeah, hearing all about how I need to learn to cook so that I can find a husband and properly feed all the grandchildren I'm supposed to be providing her," the detective said diffidently. "I've never really enjoyed that part."

Maura gave her friend a look filled with sympathy. "You know, she only pushes you about that because she wants you to be happy."

Jane frowned in annoyance. "Really? You're going to take her side on this?"

"I'm not saying that your mother doesn't occasionally cross the line when it comes to interfering in your life." Seeing Jane's outraged expression and recognizing that her friend was about to explode, Maura hurriedly amended her statement to try to placate the detective. "Alright, she _frequently_ crosses _way_ over the line when it comes to interfering in your life. But at least as far as marriage and children are concerned, she's doing it because she wants you to be happy, and she honestly believes that you won't be happy until you have children."

"Yeah," Jane scoffed, "Because I'm so maternal."

"Because it brought _her_ happiness," Maura pointed out quietly. "You and your brothers are the best things to ever happen to your mother, Jane. She assumes the same will be true for you."

Jane exhaled heavily as she considered her friend's words. After a few seconds, she waved her hand negligently. "Yeah, well, that's why I'm always saying you should never assume anything. It just leads to problems that could easily be avoided if people just waited until they had all the facts before they jumped to conclusions."

"Yes," Maura agreed dryly. "You're very wise that way."

"I know, right? You could learn a lot from my example," Jane said with a cocky grin.

"I'll keep that in mind," Maura said evenly, refusing to take the obvious bait. "While we're on the subject of learning, though, if you ever decide that you're interested in learning to make your mother's recipes, I could teach you what she's teaching me."

Jane's left eyebrow rose a fraction as she looked at her friend appraisingly. "Without any commentary?"

"Well, without your mother's commentary anyway," Maura replied with a half shrug, before a faint smile began to play about the corners of her lips. "I'm not making any promises about other things I might choose to remark on."

Jane snorted softly and shook her head. "Yeah that might be even worse." She watched for a few moments as Maura began eating again, before placing her fork down on her plate and pushing her salad slightly to the side. "There's something I've been wanting to talk to you about."

"Oh?" Maura glanced up briefly at her friend. "And what would that be?"

The brunette hesitated before speaking. "You know what today is, don't you?"

Recognizing that whatever was on the other woman's mind deserved her full attention, Maura set her fork down as well. "You mean the beginning of the Lunar New Year or Chinese New Year?" she asked.

Jane nodded in agreement. "Right, so I was thinking…maybe we should make a new resolution to make up for the one we cancelled."

Maura blinked in surprise, completely caught off guard by her friend's suggestion. "What did you have in mind?"

Jane lowered her gaze as she traced invisible patterns across the counter's surface. "How about each month, I pick a food for you to try and something for you to learn, and you do the same for me?"

Maura's forehead creased into a frown. "Jane, if you're suggesting this because you feel guilty about what happened, it's alright. You don't need to do this."

"That's not why I'm suggesting it," the brunette denied. "I just think it would be a good way for us to get out of our comfort zones a bit." Jane looked up to meet her friend's gaze and flashed Maura a crooked grin. "I heard somewhere that's a good thing to do."

Maura took a sip of wine and considered the other woman's proposition. "So you really want to do this?" she finally asked.

"I do," Jane confirmed. "As long as we can agree on some ground rules."

"Such as?"

"No algebra," Jane replied, her face serious, but Maura could see a glint of amusement in her eyes.

"Alright," Maura agreed with mock solemnity. "No algebra."

"And no seaweed ever, in anything," Jane said emphatically. This time, there was no glint.

"Agreed."

"And I swore off healthy foods for Lent," Jane said, as a grin quirked her lips.

Maura rolled her eyes and shook her head "Nice try, but you're supposed to give up something you actually enjoy for Lent. Which does beg the question…" she asked, her voice trailing off meaningfully.

Jane held up her glass. "Beer."

Maura couldn't help laughing at her friend's response. "Well that explains why you're drinking wine. Alright, any other rules?"

Jane paused for a moment, and appeared to be struggling to decide what she wanted to say. "You can't do this with Gerald too," she finally blurted out, deliberately avoiding Maura's gaze.

"What?" the medical examiner asked, not understanding what her friend was talking about.

The detective cleared her throat uncomfortably. "You can't do this with Gerald too. You told me he was interested in the idea, but if we're going to do this, it has to be _our_ thing." Jane exhaled heavily and shook her head. "I know I agreed to try and get better about sharing you with other people, but I don't want to share this with him. Ok?"

Maura nodded. "Ok." It was an easy enough request to agree to. Her relationship with Gerald had a definite expiration date, and she had a feeling that that date was approaching fast. There was no point in committing to an ongoing challenge with him when she knew they would probably be through in another month or so.

The blonde tilted her head to the side and studied her friend. "Was that it?"

Jane took a sip of wine. "Sort of, but I also have one…suggestion, because I think you were looking at this the wrong way before."

"How so?"

Jane swirled her wine around in her glass for a few moments before responding. "When you came up with this plan, you wanted me to choose things for you to learn like how to cook authentic Italian dishes, didn't you?"

"Of course. The idea was to improve ourselves."

"I thought the idea was to get us out of our comfort zones."

"It's the same thing."

"Really?" Jane asked skeptically. "Does the idea of learning how to make linguine carbonara actually make you 'uncomfortable'?"

"Well, no, I wouldn't say it makes me 'uncomfortable,'" Maura conceded, seeing her friend's point.

The detective pushed her glass to the side and then leaned forward so that her forearms were resting on top of the counter. "Maura, you've spent your whole life learning about classy, grownup things like opera, and Shakespeare, and what fork to use when you eat fish. So if you really want to get out of your comfort zone and be exposed to new things, then I should pick impractical, childish things for you to learn, and unhealthy, delicious food for you to eat."

Maura considered her friend's suggestion. She had to admit, there was merit to Jane's proposal. After all, the purpose of the resolution had been to move them out of their comfort zones. What better way for her to do that than to try things she would normally never consider trying?

"And what would I pick for you?" Maura asked.

"Classy, grownup things," Jane said, a broad smile covering her face.

Maura regarded her friend thoughtfully. "And you'd really be ok with that?"

"I really would," Jane said sincerely.

Maura nodded slowly. "Alright, I agree to your ground rules–"

"Great–"

"But," Maura warned, ignoring the interruption, "You should be aware that I have a recipe for Swiss chard smoothies that I've been wanting to try for a while now."

Jane's brow furrowed slightly. "Swiss chard?"

"It has a taste similar to beet greens or spinach, although it can be a little more bitter," Maura replied. "So if you decide to try to torture me by making me eat something as disgusting as poutine again…" she said pointedly.

"You have a Swiss chard smoothie locked and loaded, and you won't be afraid to use it. Got it."

Maura took a sip of her wine and then set the glass back down on the top of the counter. "So have you figured out what you want me to do next month?"

"Actually, I have. In honor of the fact that St. Patrick's Day will be next month, I want you to eat one _small_ bowl of Lucky Charms for breakfast."

The thought of eating a sugar-packed cereal was nearly enough to make her blench, but Maura had to admit, a small bowl certainly wouldn't hurt her. "With or without milk?"

"With, and you have to drink the milk afterwards."

"Of course, because it wouldn't be a complete breakfast if I didn't drink rainbow-colored sugar milk." Seeing Jane's grin beginning to falter, the blonde smiled. "It's fine. One small bowl is fair."

"So no smoothie, right?" Jane asked

"No smoothie," Maura reassured her friend. "What would you like me to learn?"

"Well, at first I was going to ask you to learn a magic trick, but I was afraid that you might see that as lying and break out in hives," Jane said with a smirk.

"Probably," Maura agreed.

"So instead, I want you to learn how to do a 'bar bet.'"

"What's a bar bet?"

"A bet you do in a bar."

"Thanks," Maura deadpanned. "That was helpful."

Jane chuckled lightly and shrugged. "Remember a few weeks ago when Nina laid out a line of four coins and a line of five coins and then bet Frankie she could move one coin and make two rows of five?"

"I do. She moved the extra coin on top of the coin joining the two lines."

"Right. That's a bar bet…a stupid trick you do in a bar, usually to get someone to buy the next round of drinks. I bet Nina could teach you one."

Maura considered the idea for a few moments. It was certainly the sort of thing she would never have chosen to learn on her own. "Alright, I can do that." She picked up her wine glass. "I suppose this means I need to start giving some thought as to what I want you to do next month."

"Actually, I have a suggestion for what I could learn for March," Jane said, as she stood up and walked past Maura into her living room.

The blonde paused, her glass still several inches from her lips. She slowly placed her wine back down on the counter, and turned around to face her friend. A slightly suspicious expression began to steal over her features, as she began to wonder if she had just been gulled. "And what would that be?"

Jane shuffled through several pieces of paper that were covering her coffee table, before finding the one she wanted. "This," she said, walking back over and handing the flier to her friend.

Maura's eyes widened in surprise when she read the words on the paper. "Wine tasting?"

"Yeah. I know I'll never be as good at it as you are, but I figure I could at least learn enough to have some idea what you're talking about when you talk about wine."

Maura scanned the information on the flier. The class looked interesting, and she had to admit, she was actually rather impressed by Jane's choice. It was exactly the kind of thing she would have picked for the detective to learn. "Ok. Wine tasting it is," she said, placing the flier down on the counter.

Jane cleared her throat nervously. "And I was thinking…I don't want to interfere with your relationship with Gerald or the time you spend with him–"

"Yes you do," Maura interrupted, smiling to blunt her words.

Jane grinned sheepishly. "OK, yes, I do. But I promise this suggestion isn't about that." She took a deep breath before continuing. "Maybe you could come to the classes with me?" she asked hopefully. "I know it's a beginner's course and you'd probably be really bored, but it would be less intimating if you were there with me."

Maura reached out and caught her friend by the arm and gave her a reassuring squeeze. "Of course I'll go. Even if it's a beginner's class, there's always something new to learn about wine," she pointed out. "Besides, drinking wine with you sounds like the perfect way to spend an evening."

An unmistakable expression of relief flashed across Jane's face. "Thanks! Now all you have to do is come up with a food for me to try."

Maura tapped her chin contemplatively for a few moments before replying. "I think that this month, we can make things easy. I'll pick a couple bottles of wine for you to try after we've attended the class, and you can let me know what you think of them, OK?"

"Sounds perfect," Jane agreed. "So we have a deal?" she said, extending her hand towards the medical examiner to seal the agreement.

Maura smiled her acceptance as she grasped Jane's hand in her own. "We have a deal."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So the deal was I was struggling with this chapter for awhile, mainly needing to be certain about what happened here since it was going to determine one way or the other where I went next, and I kept going back and forth about which of two ways I wanted to go. My only writing partner is someone who encourages me to write (as I encourage him), but his ability to actually serve as much of a sounding board is limited, so I was driving myself crazy trying to figure out which way I wanted to go, since each option had its advantages.<br>**

**Unfortunately, right about the time I settled on an option and got several chapters roughed out, I had a coworker decide that the best way to elevate himself was to try to sabotage me, and since nepotism is a wonderful thing, my hands were/are fairly tied as far as what I can do about it (as a bonus, he managed to convince one of my closest friends at work that I was trying to sabotage her, so she joined him to save herself from me. Credit where credit is due, he's an amazing liar). **

**Needless to say, this didn't put me in the best frame of mind, and I've had to spend a lot of my "free time" over the last few months working extra hours to make sure my position in the company was secure. But I've now managed to get to a good spot, actually spent vacation time chillin' with a friend a few weeks ago who is a great "plotter," and she let me bounce all my ideas off her and helped me to refine what I was doing. I have about 10 more days to go of putting in 15-hour work days, and then after that I should finally be free to spend my evenings writing again.**


	10. Employee Appreciation Day: Part 1

**AN: **Thanks for all the encouraging reviews.

* * *

><p><strong>March 6 – Employee Appreciation Day: Part 1<strong>

Jane flung open the door to the morgue and stormed inside, muttering angrily as she did so. Two weeks ago, one of the city's most successful prosecutors and his wife had been found murdered in their home. There were no witnesses to the crime, and very little physical evidence of any kind had been found at the scene. Every single lead they had pursued had come up empty, and the pressure she was under, both from herself and from everyone else in the damn city, was beginning to wear on her. She was tired; she was frustrated, and if the tirade she had just unleashed on Nina up in BRIC to start out the morning was anything to go by, her grip on her self-control was pretty much gone.

As she strode through the room towards Maura's office, one of the junior criminalists looked up at her with a smile and began to welcome her to the lab. He immediately lowered his head and busied himself back in his work, though, when Jane leveled an icy glare in his direction, clearly warning him that today was not the day to try to engage her in small talk. Not sparing the tech a second thought, Jane continued her purposeful steps until she was standing in the open doorway to Maura's office. Seeing the other woman standing by her desk engrossed in the file she was reading, Jane knocked firmly on the door to get the blonde's attention. "Do you have the results from the Collins' DNA test yet?'' she asked brusquely.

Maura paused in her reading to look up at her friend. "Good morning, Jane," she said with pointed politeness.

The brunette rolled her eyes as her breath escaped in an aggravated huff. She knew her failure to offer even the most basic greeting before asking a question had been rude, but right now was not a good time for a lesson in manners. Jane nodded her head irritably in vague acknowledgement of the point she knew Maura was trying to make, and then moved into the room and shut the door behind her. "Sorry," she said, her tone making it clear that she didn't actually feel any remorse for her actions. "Do you have the results?''

Maura held up the file she had been reading, her right eyebrow arching high on her forehead in response to Jane's curt tone. "Delivered five minutes ago."

Jane waited a few moments for the blonde to continue, before stepping forward impatiently. She swallowed hard and tried to hold on to her temper. "So can I see it?" she asked tightly.

"'_May'_ I see it," Maura said in her nit-picky manner that sometimes Jane found adorable, and sometimes she found annoying, and right at that particular moment, she found to be the single must aggravating thing she had ever seen anyone do in their entire life.

"Oh Jesus-fucking-Christ, Maura!" Jane ground out, so angry she was practically vibrating with rage. "Just give me the goddamn folder!" she snarled, as she snatched the file out of the blonde's hands and then turned and stalked away.

Standing with her back to the other woman, Jane opened up the folder and began to quickly scan its contents. It only took a few seconds to realize that, like every other possible clue they had found, the DNA tests on the blood stains they had found at Spencer Collins' home were a dead end. Once again, they had nothing. Two weeks of combing over the crime scene for physical clues, of medical tests, of interviewing anyone who could have an interest in seeing Spencer Collins dead, and they had absolutely nothing to show for their efforts. They were just spinning their wheels, and not getting any closer to finding the murderers.

The sound of Maura's phone receiving an incoming text message interrupted Jane's gloomy thoughts. As she listened to the other woman pick up her phone, the realization of what she had just done slammed through the detective. She had charged in looking to pick a fight. She'd been rude, and aggressive, and completely over the line of acceptable behavior when she had taken the folder from Maura. Closing her eyes briefly, she focused on her breath, determined to be completely in control of herself before she faced her friend. Maura would be well within her rights to yell at the detective the instant she turned around. The last thing Jane needed to do was react and get defensive and just escalate everything all over again.

Jane drew in one last, deep breath and then slowly let it out again, before finally turning to face her friend. "Maura, I'm…" The brunette paused when she saw the other woman looking at her phone strangely. "What's wrong?"

The medical examiner continued to focus on her phone as she answered. "That was Frankie. He wanted to let me know you were in a really bad mood, so if I saw you, I should be careful not to 'poke the bear.'" Maura looked up at her friend, a thoughtful expression on her face. "I'm not familiar with that phrase, but judging by the context, I think it's safe to say that I managed to do just that."

"Yeah," Jane said apologetically.

Maura looked back down at her phone. "He also says that you 'tore Nina a new one.'" The medical examiner raised her gaze to meet her friend's. "Judging by the fact that you are walking around freely, I will assume that doesn't mean that you actually physically assaulted her."

"No, it means she said something that pissed me off, and I yelled at her like a 'Grade A' bitch."

Maura placed her phone back down on her desk. "And what did she say?"

Jane shrugged and looked away, the overwhelming sense of failure she felt right at that moment making it impossible for her to look Maura in the eyes. "She said that no one Spencer Collins put away has gotten out of jail recently, and that they were checking all known associates of everyone he ever put away, but that's a lot of people, and so far, none of them have come back as any kind of positive lead…and it will be days before we can possibly check everyone."

Jane drew in a deep breath and turned to look at her friend. "But you know what? It doesn't matter anyway, because checking all those guys out is a completely pointless waste of time, because the killer wasn't supposed to be a killer, he was supposed to be a burglar," Jane continued, her voice rising slightly as her gestures began to grow more animated. "A couple of guys decided to rob the place, and Collins and his wife just came home at the _wrong fucking time_, which means they were killed by two completely random guys who are new enough to being on the wrong side of the law that they've never gotten arrested and fingerprinted…or had their DNA collected," Jane snarled, holding up the folder she had taken from Maura for emphasis.

Realizing that she was starting to lose her temper again, the brunette dropped the folder onto the coffee table and then collapsed onto Maura's couch. She leaned her head back against the top cushion and closed her eyes, briefly allowing herself to shut out all the voices of the people that were pressuring her to solve this case. She heard Maura walk over to the couch and then felt the cushions shift as the blonde sat down beside her. Exhaling softly, Jane opened her eyes and wearily rolled her head to the right to look at her friend. "And that while we're wasting our time chasing after all the people connected with the guys Collins put away, the case is getting cold, and if I don't figure something out soon, I'm going to have to hear Crowe busting my ass about this every day for the rest of my career."

Maura placed a hand on the brunette's leg and began rubbing soothing circles just above her knee. "Nina certainly had a lot to say. I had no idea she could be so talkative."

Jane chuckled tiredly. "Oh yeah, she's a real 'Chatty Cathy' when she gets on a roll."

Maura nodded absently. "Yes, well, I can't say that I really agree with 'Nina's' assessment of the situation."

Jane sighed heavily. "We're never going to find who killed Collins unless they're dumb enough to get caught in the future for something, and we get some kind of match then."

"You don't know that," Maura protested.

"I don't _not_ know that," Jane countered with a faint grin. After a few seconds, though, the grin disappeared and Jane's expression took on a much more somber tone. "Seriously, Maura, the smart money is on me failing here."

Maura shook her head and shifted to sit closer to her friend. She brushed the hair off the detective's forehead and then began lightly running her fingers through Jane's dark curls, gently massaging her scalp as she did so. "I don't know what you mean by 'smart money,' but I'd never be foolish enough to bet against you."

Jane snorted softly with laughter. "That has got to be the corniest thing you've ever said to me."

"Oh I'm sure it wasn't the absolute corniest thing I've ever said to you," Maura said seriously, but her eyes were sparkling with humor.

"Really?" Jane teased. "You're positive it wasn't?"

"Oh no," Maura corrected. "I'm sure, but I'm not positive."

A look of confusion appeared on Jane's face. "What?"

"To be 'sure' refers to being certain in one's beliefs," Maura explained. "I _believe_ that the odds are that at some point in the past, something I said was cornier; therefore, I am sure of this fact. To be positive, however, refers to having actual, concrete evidence, not simply theory and speculation. As I lack that kind of evidence, I cannot be positive that it wasn't the corniest thing I've ever said."

"God, you are so…so not normal," Jane said, shaking her head in dazed wonder. "You have no idea how much I love you for that," she murmured, as she leaned against her friend's side and rested her head on Maura's shoulder. The brunette sighed softly in contentment and closed her eyes when she felt Maura's arm wrap around her and hold her close. She'd missed this…this spending time with just the two of them. There was just something about being in Maura's presence that could just instantly begin to calm her. Or at least, it could when she wasn't acting like an out of control asshole, she acknowledged to herself remorsefully.

"I'm sorry about the way I acted before," Jane said in a hushed voice. "I had no right to yell at you or take that file away from you. It was disrespectful as a friend and a colleague." The detective swallowed hard, before forcing herself to meet the other woman's gaze. "I promise I won't do anything like that again."

Maura smiled at her friend gratefully. "Thank you. And I'm sorry about giving you a hard time earlier. You don't need someone correcting your grammar."

Jane shrugged negligently. "It's ok. Someone has to do it," she said, her grin briefly spreading to her eyes, before fading. "I'm really getting worried I'm not going to get these guys," she said quietly.

Maura pondered Jane's words for several seconds, and then pressed a kiss to the top of the detective's head. "I'll tell you what. I'll make you a bet that you do."

Jane's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really?" she asked, a bit taken aback by the unexpected offer. "What would we each get if we win?"

"If I win…hmmm…" Maura mulled the question for a few moments, before a slow smile began to appear on her face. "If I win, I get to pick the location of our vacation, and you will let me pay for getting us there."

Jane's eyes narrowed slightly. "But we'll split everything else?" she asked, unwilling to agree to let the other woman pay for anything more. Receiving Maura's nod of confirmation, the brunette nodded as well. "OK, and what do I get if I win?"

"If you win, I will not only state in front of as many witnesses as you would like, that you were right, and I was wrong, I will also‒"

"You will also say that I was right about poutine being a wonderful food," Jane interrupted with a broad smirk.

Maura's jaw clenched slightly, but she nodded her head. "And I will also say that poutine is a wonderful food…AND," she hurriedly continued, seeing Jane about to interrupt again, "I will tell your mother directly, in words that cannot be misunderstood or misinterpreted, that she needs to stop interfering and let you live your own life‒"

"DEAL!" Jane said, quickly sitting up and extending her hand.

Maura accepted Jane's hand and shook it with a smile. Just as the blonde began to pull away, however, a thought suddenly struck the detective and she tightened her grip on her friend. "Wait…there's no way for me to win this. I can't win 'never.'"

"Yes," Maura agreed, barely holding back a smile, "I thought offering to tell your mother to butt out of your life might entice you to agree before you realized that."

The medical examiner once again tried to release herself from their handshake, but Jane simply tightened her grip again. "You have to give me an end date."

"I don't think I do," Maura denied. "The deal was made in good faith."

"Good faith?" Jane scoffed. "You tricked me. You just admitted it."

"That's true, I did," Maura agreed thoughtfully, "That was probably a mistake on my part."

"Maura," Jane rumbled warningly.

"Ok, ok, you're right. I owe you an end date." The medical examiner rose gracefully from the couch and walked over to her desk to pick up her cell phone, before returning to sit at Jane's side once more. The detective watched as her friend brought up her calendar. To her surprise, Maura then extended the phone to her. "Here. Put it in."

Completely confused, Jane took the phone from her friend. "When is it?"

Maura waited for Jane to look up and make eye contact before answering. "The end date for the bet, assuming that you do not catch the ones responsible sooner, is the day that you agree to close this case. So just go ahead and mark that on my calendar for me, and we'll have our date."

Jane stared at her friend in silence, unable to do anything more than simply appreciate just how thoroughly Maura had managed her. They both knew that Jane would never agree to close the case. Even if the department someday chose to shut the case down, the brunette would never stop investigating until she found the men who were guilty. Finally, she lowered her head and laughed wryly. "I guess I can't argue with that, can I," she asked gruffly, as she handed Maura's phone back to her without any date marked.

"You could try," Maura said. "But you would lose." She placed her phone on the coffee table and then reached out and took Jane's right hand in her own. "You're off your sport, Jane. Are you getting enough sleep?" she asked gently.

"Game, not sport, Maura. Off your game. And I'm getting as much sleep as usual."

Maura cocked her head slightly to the side. "Are you eating healthy?"

"Same as usual."

"So no to both questions?" Maura chided, her voice a strange mix of both reproval and resigned amusement.

Jane turned to look at her friend. "My health food for the month is wine. Maybe I just need to start drinking lots of wine."

"Well, I don't think we should try excessive drinking just yet," Maura replied, "But why don't you come over to my place tonight? Let me cook dinner for you. Then afterwards, you can fall asleep on my couch while we watch a movie."

The offer, if Jane were honest with herself, was very tempting. She knew some time off would probably do her good, and beyond that, she just plain and simply missed spending time with Maura alone. The problem, though, was that her growing desperation to find Spencer Collins' murderers made it difficult for her to let up for even one night.

Suddenly Jane frowned, as a thought struck her. "It's Friday. Didn't you tell me you had a date with Gerald tonight? Something involving a special bottle of wine?"

Maura nodded slowly. "I was planning on cooking for him, but considering everything that's going on right now, Gerald would understand me spending the evening with you instead of him."

Jane resisted the urge to argue the point, but she seriously doubted that Gerald would be particularly 'understanding' about anything that involved her. The detective sighed inwardly. Now that she thought about it, she remembered Maura telling her all about the perfect meal she had planned to make to go with the special bottle of Gerald's favorite wine she had picked up. Truthfully, a very large part of her wanted to say 'yes' to Maura's offer purely for the sake of messing up Gerald's evening, but she couldn't do that. She had agreed that she would be better about sharing Maura with others. Forcing her friend to give up a special night just so Jane had some place to fall asleep watching a movie would be pretty much the opposite of that goal. "I can't right now, Maura. Once this case is over, though, I'll definitely take you up on that."

"I understand," the medical examiner said with a resigned sigh. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Jane began to respond, but stopped at the sound of an incoming text. She quickly pulled out her phone, hoping to see a message from Korsak. Disappointment filled her, however, when she saw that the text was from Erin. All but certain what it was going to say, she opened the message, dimly aware of Maura rising to her feet and walking away as she did so. It only took a few moments for Jane to confirm her guess: Erin was asking if she wanted to get together for drinks that night. Exhaling heavily, Jane began composing her response.

"Is something wrong?" Maura asked.

"No, it's just…" Jane's words trailed off distractedly for a few moments as she continued to type. "It's uh…it's just that one of Korsak's CIs contacted him and said he had information, so Korsak went to meet with him. I was hoping this was Korsak telling me we had an actual lead." She finished her message and returned her phone to her pocket. She looked back up at her friend and saw that Maura was now leaning back against the front of her desk. "But it was just Erin asking if I wanted to go out tonight. This makes the third time in a row I've turned her down," Jane said with a half shrug. "She's going to start thinking I'm avoiding her."

Maura looked at the brunette curiously. "Is everything alright with the two of you?"

"Everything's fine, I just don't have time to see her right now."

Maura hesitated for a moment before replying. "Maybe you should make the time."

"I don't feel like going out with anyone right now," Jane said, leaning back into the couch and closing her eyes. She knew she should get up and go back upstairs, but she was tired, and it wasn't as if they were making any progress anyway. Besides, as soon as she got up there, she was going to have to apologize to Nina, and she had no idea yet what she was going to say.

"It might help."

"What?" Jane asked distractedly.

"You're obviously very stressed," Maura said pragmatically. "Sexual activity has been demonstrated to reduce stress and anxiety and lower blood pressure. It's also been shown to improve analytical thinking, help a person to sleep, and improve overall mood, all of which would be helpful for you right now."

Jane slowly sat up straight, a look of utter incredulity on her face. "Did you just tell me that I need to get laid?"

Maura frowned slightly as she considered the question. "Yes," she said calmly, after a few moments had passed. "I suppose I did."

Jane snorted in disbelief. "Yeah, I'm not doing that."

"I don't understand why not," Maura replied, clearly puzzled by the other woman's objection to her suggestion. "You've said yourself that your relationship with Erin is largely based on sex, so why not take advantage of that fact. Take the night off, relax, and tomorrow you can return to the case refreshed and rejuvenated."

"Look, once this case is over, I'll be more than ready to call Erin up and spend the night 'rejuvenating,'" Jane said meaningfully, "But if I had sex with Erin right now, it would just be…wrong."

"Why would it be wrong?"

"Because I don't want to be the kind of person who fucks someone I don't care about, just to forget about the fact that I had a crappy day," Jane snapped in annoyance, before catching herself again. Reminding herself that Maura wasn't trying to make her mad, that she was honestly just attempting to suggest the course of action that she thought would be the most helpful, the brunette paused to take a steadying breath before speaking again. "If I was with Erin tonight, it'd just be about taking control and using her without caring how she felt, and then leaving as soon as I was satisfied. Erin may not be my girlfriend, but I'm still not going to treat her like that."

The medical examiner nodded her head in understanding. "Alright...I see, and honestly, I think that is a great attitude to have about sex." Maura tapped her chin thoughtfully. "So unfortunately, while sex would provide numerous benefits that would be helpful to you right now, you cannot have sex with Erin because you don't want to feel obligated to reciprocate, or even care about how she is feeling, and you don't want to feel guilty about that fact either."

"That's not exactly how I would have put it, but I guess that's close enough," Jane muttered, wishing Maura would just drop the whole thing.

"Well then the answer is simple," Maura said. "You need to have sex with someone who understands your situation, and would only care about your pleasure and seeing that you got exactly what you needed, without any expectation of reciprocation once you had achieved your release." A teasing glint appeared in Maura's eyes, as a suggestive grin began to play about the corners of her mouth. "I believe the answer to your problem is right in front of you."

For an instant, time seemed to come to a crashing halt, and Jane nearly forgot how to breathe. Maura couldn't possibly be suggesting what it sounded like she was proposing, could she? Sure, they had admitted that they found the other attractive, and they flirted with each other all the time, but they had also both agreed that they could not cross the line between friends and lovers.

Fighting back the images of Maura naked in bed, gasping and moaning with pleasure, writhing beneath someone who was definitely NOT Gerald, Jane swallowed hard to get past the tightness in her throat. "It is?"

"Well," Maura said, her head tilting slightly to the side, "I suppose it's more accurate to say that the answer is 'close at hand,'" she said, nodding meaningfully towards the detective's hands.

It took Jane's brain several seconds to push aside the thoughts from before and process what her friend was saying, but once she did, she felt her embarrassment level ratchet up several more notches. "Jesus, Maura. Really?" she demanded. God what was wrong with her? How could she have allowed herself to believe that Maura was suggesting they have sex? They had agreed not to go there, and yet she constantly found herself imaging what it would be like to have Maura Isles as a lover.

Forcing those thoughts aside, Jane instead focused on the current problem facing her: Maura's suggestion. "I'm not doing…that," she muttered, feeling her cheeks flaming bright red.

Maura waved her hand dismissively. "Honestly Jane, masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of. Take some time tonight to draw yourself a bath, relax, and then just take matters into your own hands, so to speak."

Jane shook her head and rose to stand. "Okay we are so not talking about this." If the choice was between talking about sex with Maura, and swallowing her pride and apologizing to Nina, the apology was the clear winner.

"Why not?"

Still reeling, Jane struggled to find a way to escape from the conversation. "Because you're my friend," she replied, in a tone that indicated the answer should be obvious without her having to say it.

"I'm a doctor."

"You're not MY doctor," Jane growled through clenched teeth.

Maura sighed. "Jane–"

"No no no no no!" Jane said emphatically as she began walking towards the door to Maura's office. Clearly, this was her punishment for having indecent thoughts about her best friend. "We are not having this discussion. Not now. Not ever."

"Alright," Maura said, holding up her hands to signal her surrender. "I'm sorry. The last thing I intended to do was cause you even more stress."

"I know," Jane said tightly, as she paused with her hand on the door handle. And the fact was, she did know that. Maura was just trying to help. The problem was that right now, Jane was finding it hard to remember that she couldn't pursue a sexual relationship with her friend. Making matters worse, Jane wasn't entirely certain she would have turned Maura down if the medical examiner had been making the offer that Jane had thought she had.

"Look, I need to go apologize to Nina for taking everything out on her earlier," Jane said. "If I'm in the building later, maybe we could have lunch together?"

A look of chagrin flashed across Maura's features. "I'm sorry. I can't, I already made arrangements to take everyone out for lunch. It's Employee Appreciation Day."

"Which explains the presents I saw out there when I was walking through the morgue," Jane mused. "It's ok," she reassured her friend. "I'll grab something from the café."

"Or I could bring something back for you," Maura suggested.

The detective shook her head. "Don't worry about it. I'll be fine."

"Well at least take a break for coffee with me this afternoon."

The detective's left eyebrow immediately shot up high on her forehead. "Seriously? Dr. Isles is going to encourage me to drink coffee in the afternoon?"

"I think under the circumstances, I can make a determination that drinking one regular cup of coffee this afternoon would not do you irreparable damage," Maura said with mock solemnity.

"Awesome. Then we are scheduled for one 'regular' cup of coffee," Jane said, holding her hands about a foot apart to demonstrate her ideas as to what constituted a regular size cup.

Maura rolled her eyes but otherwise did nothing to disabuse the brunette's notion regarding the size of a regular coffee. Instead, she walked over to stand beside her friend and placed a hand on her right arm. "Jane, I'm sorry about giving you a hard time earlier."

"I told you, it's ok."

"No, it's really not," Maura said quietly, her voice filled with concern. "I should have realized that this investigation is putting a lot more stress on you than normal." The medical examiner shook her head slowly. "I'm usually better about recognizing how you are feeling. I don't usually need Frankie to tell me when you're really upset," she continued ruefully. Maura lowered her head and fell silent for a moment, before exhaling heavily. "I don't know, lately, where you and I are concerned, I just feel so...so…"

"Out of sync?" Jane asked quietly.

Maura looked back up to meet her friend's gaze. "Yes."

A long pause filled the room, as both women considered what to say next.

Jane finally broke the silence with a soft laugh. "This doesn't bode well for us dancing together at the wedding next week, does it? Maybe you should rethink taking me."

Maura smiled and gave her friend's arm an affectionate squeeze. Shaking her head, she walked back over to the coffee table to retrieve the file Jane had deposited there earlier. "Sorry, but you're not getting out of this that easily. I'm sure we'll be fine."

"Sure, or positive?" Jane teased.

Maura flashed her friend a sly smirk. "As I lack certain critical data that I would need in order to make an analytical judgment, I am relying on my beliefs, and therefore, I am sure, not positive."

"Uh huh…and just what beliefs are you relying on here?" Jane asked. "That I am always amazing at everything I do?"

"No, that _I_ am an amazing dancer," Maura said with a smug grin. "So I should be able to smooth out any mistakes that you may make."


End file.
